


Diametrically Opposed

by unknown_knowns



Series: The One Good Thing in Seattle [2]
Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, College, Drama, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, LGBTQ Themes, acts as a replacement for the events of the game, all of the TWs for Jefferson, alternative universe, but I couldn't find a tag for that, but also people can communicate, mostly inner-demons actually, revolving POV, seriously the dude is creepy af, so that works itself out, time powers still exist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-14 20:11:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 48,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8027380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknown_knowns/pseuds/unknown_knowns
Summary: The one good thing in Seattle didn’t want Max Caulfield anymore.But that was her past.Max begins her new life in college.But that was her future.Her past and future collide. Old friends are threatened; new friends are found.The center cannot hold without some careful needle-threading.Meanwhile, a person resigned to their fate threatens to ruin it all.





	1. Awake

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, friends.
> 
> I wrote this as a character study. The POV revolves primarily around Max, Victoria, and Rachel. Chloe, Nathan, and Mr. Jefferson are secondary. Vixine is definitely my main ship, but both of the listed ships are plot-relevant and both are important to Max's personality and motivations. 
> 
> See the [Series](http://archiveofourown.org/series/557492) for more information on how exactly this is an AU.
> 
> This was written as two acts. The first act deals with Max's (re-)establishing relationships, and can largely be seen as a prequel to the events of the game. The second act deals with Mr. Jefferson and can largely be seen as a replacement to the events of the game. Act two gets worse before it gets better, but I promise, it does get better.
> 
> Comments mean the world to me. Especially if they're thoughtful. I'll try to reply to every one of them!
> 
> I also [have a tumblr](https://i-know-unkown-knowns.tumblr.com/) if that's your kink or you want to ask me things.

Tomorrow came too quickly.

Her phone screeched out an angry buzzing noise and her hand reached out to silence it before her eyes even opened or her brain even started to work.

The silence that fell immediately afterwards was almost as relaxing as when she first laid down.

But …

Max knew what that sound meant.

That wasn’t her usual morning alarm. That was the late warning one.

She had maybe ten minutes to do all of her morning rituals and get to her first class.

Maxine Caulfield was going to be late for her first day of college.

She was going to mess up literally the first thing she could have for the semester.

So with a severely exaggerated groan, she peeled herself out of her bed and ambled over to her clothes closet.

When she opened it, her own face greeted her from the mirror attached to the closet door.

Tired. Dazed. Distant.

The bags under her eyes were new, but … with a smile, she reached up and tossed her fingers through her head to flatten out some of the bed head, and to feel out some of the texture of her unkempt brown locks.

She was still alive, still herself, and her first day of college had officially started.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all. She hadn’t even lost any of her freckles. That was a thing a thing that happened, right?

 _Focus, Max. You have somewhere to be_.

She pulled her attention away from that mirror and quickly picked out some clothing.

Her fashion sense wasn’t all that, but one of her childhood friends had impressed upon her a certain method for picking out clothes that made it seem like she almost knew what she was doing.

She had picked out some of her nicest clothes that could still be considered “casual”.

After all, you have to dress for success when you’re meeting the legendary Mark Jefferson for the first time.

Plus, it made her feel more confident to wear good clothes.

She got dressed, decided she didn’t have the time to shower or do much else with her hair, and left for class.

Outside of her door, she checked her phone. Ten minutes.

Well, she needed more exercise, anyway.

When she made it outside of the dorm after what could have only be described as brisk walking slash jogging slash freaking out, she paused and breathed in the fresh, chilly air.

The sun was out in full force, but there was still a clear bite to the air that helped to wake her up more thoroughly.

None-the-less, there was plenty of people out and about. It helped that it hadn’t snowed recently.

It made her smile. So many new faces. So many opportunities.

Her eyes broke away from the scene to look downwards to her pocket, where her hand was already fishing her phone and some earbuds out.

She was just about to put one of them in when an unfamiliar voice registered very distinctly in her ears – volume at the level of a shout.

“Max! Over here!”

Her eyes shot up.

Strangers wouldn’t know she preferred to be called “max” instead of her full name, but this voice was definitely new to her.

So … _how?_

Her brows furrowed and her eyes narrowed as she scanned around for the source of the interruption.

Two girls, dressed rather nicely, sitting under a tree.

One was a blonde, and the other a brunette.

The blonde was waving her hand in a beckoning motion emphatically.

Max bit her lip.

She really didn’t have time to dawdle, but … strangers knowing her name had her insatiable curiosity piqued. 

She could at least see what they wanted before jetting. Her hand – which had frozen the instant she heard her name – slowly put her phone and earbuds back into her pocket and she made her way over to the tree.

As she got closer, she could make out more details.

The blonde was wearing more fashionable clothes – they looked expensive, too. Her hair was long.

The brunette was fastidiously filling out some paper work. Max didn’t get much time to absorb her appearance before the blonde started talking.

“There you are! Hi!”

“Um, Hi. How’d you know my name? We haven’t met ---”

“Oh, right! Silly me. I’m Taylor. Taylor Christensen. I’m Victoria’s friend.”

Victoria. _Victoria._

 _Shit_.

She _totally_ forgot Victoria would be here, too.

Max realized she was starting to space out from this revelation –-- memories coming flooding back, new anxieties surfacing --- so to give herself some time to process, she carefully sat down in front of the two, legs crossed.

She tried to focus on the conversation instead of the implications of the news.

“Hi, Taylor. Victora’s, uh, a name I haven’t heard in a while. She tell you much about me?”

“Duh.”

Max frowned.

“We haven’t said a word to each other in … two or three years, now.”

Taylor shifted uncomfortably for a few seconds.

“Yeah, I know.”

She looked around, and then hesitated.

“Look, Max, I know things didn’t end in the best ways between you two, but can you try to at least be friendly with her?”

“Why? She sure hasn’t been to me.”

“You still care about her, don’t you?”

 _Owch_.

Right for the jugular.

Just what the hell had Victoria told her?

Now it was Max’s turn to shift around uncomfortably and hesitate on a response.

Max was at a serious information disadvantage here and didn’t know just how much this girl knew about her relationship with Victoria – a lie could seriously backfire.

She settled on honesty.

“I don’t know. It’s been _so long_ , Taylor …”

Max then remembered she was _late late late late,_ and, with a grimace, she started to stand up.

“Ugh, I’m late for class. Can we talk about this later?”

“Oh. Yes. Right. Of course. Here --- “

Taylor fished out a little piece of paper with a number written on it. Max finished dusting herself off.

“It’s mine. You let me know when you have some time to talk about this, alright?”

Max took the offered paper.

“Alright. Thanks Taylor. It was nice meeting you.”

“It was nice meeting you too, Max.”

Max continued on her way to class, now with even more angry bees buzzing around in her head.

How _did_ she forget that Victoria was going to be here?

She was never very quiet or subtle about it.

Max knew they both wanted to go here.

Had she really sealed all of that off that effectively?

Why hadn’t Chloe brought this up at all? Max had talked to Chloe about Victoria a lot.

 _Ugh_.

The rest of the walk slash franticly unplanned exercise was uneventful, save for all of her thoughts.

When she arrived to the door just outside of her first class, the weight of all of this had her head tilted with a hand rubbing her temples.

All she had to do was just push open the door and try to forget, to focus on ---

A hand grasped at her shoulder and forced her to still.

Well, she was still after she almost shot ten feet up in the air, anyway.

She opened her eyes, looked up, and diligently reminded herself to _breathe_.

“Maxaroni and cheese! You’re still on for tonight, right?”

Chloe’s grinning face greeted her.

Of course it was Chloe.

She had no choice but to let some of her friend’s good vibes rub off on her.

Chloe’s eyes were always bright when she was looking at Max, and she had this kind of grin that was almost impossible to remove.

She kept her brown-blonde hair shorter than Max kept hers, but usually styled it more.

Max even saw her with a Mohawk once, but that lasted for all of a week.

Chloe’s fashion sense was hilariously mismatched with Max’s.

Chloe spent a lot of her time with skaters, and dressed in appropriately ill-fitting clothing. Only her plaid jacket really settled in the right ways on her.

Everything that Max had fit her well – in fact these stupid jeans often felt like they fit her _too_ well.

Max preferred bright, solid colors.

Chloe liked patterns, darker colors, and graphic tees.

“Of course, Clo. I wouldn’t miss meeting Rachel for the world.”

It wasn’t technically a lie, but it wasn’t the whole story, either. Max didn’t say that she was still freaking out with very confusing, sort-of-kind-of jealous emotions with Chloe and Rachel being together.

It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Chloe with the information – she trusted Chloe with her life – but she felt guilty and hated that she even had these emotions in the first place.

It wouldn’t be fair to burden Chloe with them.

When Max and her family fucked off to Seattle and Max got some new friends, Chloe was supportive. When Max gushed about her first crush, Chloe was supportive. When Max was raw after her first heart break, Chloe was supportive.

Chloe had never been anything but the best friend in the world to her.

And she couldn’t return that in genuine for no damn good reason other than her stupid brain and its stupid illogical emotions.

And it _sucked_.

But the silence had gone on for too long now.

Max was staring without realizing it.

“Is there something on my face? You weren’t thinking about the mohawk again, were you? I told you, that was --”

“Oh! Uh, sorry. I’ve just been thinking a lot about today.”

This got a laugh out of Chloe.

“Dude, when aren’t you thinking a lot? So long as you don’t bail.”

Chloe’s smile faltered slightly. _Shit._ Did Chloe sniff out she had not told her everything? She was freakishly good at doing that sometimes.

“You alright Max? I like the threads, but it looks like someone took a marker to your eyelids.”

“Just… tired. And um, maybe a little late.”

Chloe’s smile returned in earnest. Often, the only way to get Chloe off of her trail was to distract her with another topic she just _had_ to tease Max about.

“Awww, my little maxipad still cares about being late. Well don’t let me hold you, then. I wouldn’t want to get in the way of you sucking Jefferon’s di ---”

Max shoved her to shut her up before she could finish.

“Chloe!”

But they were laughing and giggling and giddy all the same.

After she had hugged Chloe goodbye, she had _almost_ managed to forget how nervous she was about meeting Jefferson.

 _Almost_.

When she was pushing the door open, her stomach was still doing this stupid nervous tying thing that felt terrible and it was impossibly distracting.

Her eyes scanned the room. It was entirely indoors – no windows -- and pretty small; there were enough seats for maybe 20 people, and the tables weren’t perfectly aligned; a sign that they were moved frequently, Max’s brain intuited.

The room itself was entirely uninspiring past that – boring gray walls with a boring gray ceiling and no discernable decorations.

Not even some posters.

Jefferson wasn’t here yet. She wasn’t late.

She found a seat near the middle to take.

Placing her bag down felt like more of a weight off of her than it actually was.

It just felt so good to _not literally screw up your first chance at screwing up_ that she found herself sighing contently and smiling unaided.

Her attention then wandered around the room.

Lots of people chatting all around her – the murmur was loud enough to ensure some privacy in casual conversation.

The desks on her sides were pulled off into a group pow-wow off to another side of the class.

The seat behind her was vacant.

The seat in front of her housed a studious-looking blonde with her hair up in a cute little bun. She was the only one not engaged in conversation.

_Do some chit-chat, Max. It’ll be nice to have some friends in this class._

She tapped the girl’s shoulder from behind and put on her best, warmest smile to greet her as she turned around.

“Hi, my name is Max. What’s yours?”

“Oh, hello. I’m Kate.”

Kate was impossibly warm and accepting. Unlike Chloe’s grin, which was erratic and felt like more a function of her barely-contained energy, Kate’s smile was slow and reserved. Her eyes never broke contact and she managed to seem interested in every word Max had to offer. Even though Kate hugged at herself and seemed unsure of her own contributions to the conversation, she was a great listener.

They didn’t have all that much to talk about, though.

Kate’s interest in photography was peripheral; she was an artist in the greater sense.

Her true passion was her drawings, but she still entertained other activities, like music and photography.

It had to have been a few minutes past when class was actually supposed to start when the door finally opened and Mr. Jefferson walked in.

Right behind him was none other than Victoria Chase. Kate turned to face forwards again.

Max’s breath hitched. Not only was Victoria at the same school she was, but the same classes?

Victoria had changed.

In appearance, at least.

Her hair was longer at the top and bangs and shorter at the sides than Max ever remembered it and she was wearing far more makeup than she really needed to – but it did give her face this impossibly _perfect_ quality to it.

It looked like she had pressganged every inch of her face into complying.

She didn’t even have an errant hair sticking out rebelliously, despite the wind-swept style looking like something that would be susceptible to the day’s wear.

And of course, her clothes were immaculately pressed and perfectly coordinated.

Victoria always prided herself in her fashion sense.

Victoria, for her part, was too busy doting after Jefferson to notice Max.

At first.

After he had hushed and dismissed her, she finally had a good chance to see the classroom proper – and to notice Max.

And therein was the unmistakable look of shock and worry - even if Victoria immediately recovered, Max had gotten good at reading Victoria’s brief flashes of emotion on her face.

It was pretty much the only way to read her when she didn’t want to be read, which was pretty much always.

Victoria was making a bee line for Max. Max had a split second of freaking out before she remembered her surroundings.

_Dummy, the chair behind you is the only one left._

As Victoria sat in the seat behind her, Max wondered what tack the blonde would take.

Victoria was the one who started ignoring her first.

Would she continue?

She was suddenly reminded of Victoria’s own words to her, all of those years ago.

_Chin up. Puff your chest out. Think for a few seconds before you speak so you don’t stammer. Be assertive._

She couldn’t let the ball stay in Victoria’s court.

She might never play ball that way.

Max sucked in a deep breath, shoved down the thoughts in her head screaming at her to stop, and turned around.

“We need to talk.”

Max said it as forcefully as she could manage.

Surprise. Confusion. Concern. Frustration. Concern again.

Victoria’s face shuffled from expression to expression for an uncharacteristically long time.

In another context, it would have been quite amusing.

Eventually, she settled on an aloof expression that she often wore.

Max was definitely not paying attention to the lavender perfume Victoria had on.

Even if it was her favorite.

Nope.

“After class.”

“Alright.”

A Victoria willing to talk to her was an improvement over a Victoria ignoring her.

Max turned back around just in time to glance a worried-looking Kate looking in their direction, who hurriedly looked away as soon as she was seen – was she eavesdropping? What ---

“Welcome everyone to your first day of Introduction to Photography class. I’m Mr. Jefferson. I’ll be your instructor. For many people, photography …”

The class was starting.

Of course.

_Focus, Max. Do not get caught not paying attention on your first day of class._

With some difficulty, she extracted herself from her life just for this hour to listen to Jefferson.

Class ended too soon.

Mr. Jefferson had “a way with words” if she was being charitable, or he was a bit stream-of-conscience-rambling-old-man if she wasn’t.

Still, he clearly was very excited and interested in photography, and his words oozed out deeper knowledge into all kinds of the more obscure parts of photography.

She was so excited to learn more.

So excited, in fact, she found her body picking up her bag and walking to the front of the class before her mind really fully finished reconnecting itself.

“M-Mr. Jefferson? I’m a huge fan of your work. My name is Max …”

He looked up and offered her an earnest smile.

“Always a pleasure to meet a fan. I hope you’ll have some interesting photos that we can discuss this semester.”

“I --- “

In her periphery, she saw Victoria leaving the class. Shit. Max really did need to have that conversation with her.

“I … I definitely will do that.” It pained her to end the conversation so quickly. “I really have to get going; I agreed to meet someone after class. It was nice meeting you, Mr. Jefferson.”

“Goodbye, Max.”

Max hoped her smile seemed genuine even when her mind was racing with thoughts of Victoria up and vanishing – spending the rest of the semester sitting as far away from her as possible, pointedly refusing to acknowledge she even existed –--

She was so caught up in these worried thoughts she was more than a little bit surprised that Victoria was just waiting there for her right outside the class room door, leaning on some wall, absent-mindedly picking at her phone. 

Max caught her breath and forced herself to look more calm. Freaking out was the last thing she needed to do before her first real conversation with Victoria in years.

“Max _ine_.”

Max flinched. Her “full” name was usually reserved for when Victoria had been angry or frustrated at her.

She knew just how to emphasize the absolutely wrong parts of Max’s name. Just like Victoria's father.

But.

Two could play at this game.

“ _Vicky_.”

All things considered, it wasn’t the best start.

“Did you just ---“

Victoria groaned in this way that she did whenever Max did something so horribly awful it caused her physical pain.

In this case, using her absolute least favorite pet name.

It was of little surprise when Victoria’s hand came up to rub at her temples and her eyes closed.

Max basically had the _Victoria Chase Owner's Manual_ and knew all of these little ticks she had.

“Look. Max.”

Her tone was softer and lower.

Maybe she regretted starting this conversation that way, too.

When her hand was finished, she put her phone away and crossed her arms in a posture that was so Victoria she might as well have trademarked it by now. Another one of her ticks.

“What happened was years ago. We’re different people now. Can we just move on and stay as … acquaintances?“

The hesitation on the last word Max picked out immediately.

Her brain worked in over drive to process what it meant.

Victoria never hesitated on words.

She had “dramatic pauses”, but she never spent even a second floundering like a fish.

She must have planned to say another word, but chickened out at the last second.

Was she going to say “friend”?

Should Max press her on this?

Did she even want to? Victoria was the asshole, here. Reconnecting could just bring her pain.

“A-alright. You don’t hate me anymore? You were pretty clear …”

She trailed off.  Victoria grimaced.

“That I didn’t want to see you ever again. Correct.”

Victoria sighed. She spent a few seconds with her eyes closed.

“And I meant it, then. But no, I don’t hate you. You just made me afraid, Max. And it took me a while to accept you didn’t mean to. So …”

Victoria gestured vaguely in front of her with a hand,

“… can we play nice or not?”

Made her afraid? How did --- why would --- didn’t _mean_ to?

With more conscious effort, Max slowed her thoughts down.

It wasn’t going to do her any good to hyper-analyze whatever Victoria said right now.

Instead, she nodded, and put on her best smile again.

“Yes. We can play nice.”

“Good, I’ve got …”

Victoria trailed off now, with her gaze looking somewhere behind Max.

Max turned her head to follow what was going on, and saw Kate’s backside hurriedly walking away. What …?

“Weirdo bitch was staring. Good thing you’ve took my advice to heart and decided to be presentable in public, or I’d have to kill her for seeing you with me.”

Victoria’s words brought her back to reality. Along with it, her head turned back.

Despite herself, Max found herself wanting to defend Kate.

“She’s really nice, Victoria. You shouldn’t judge people so quickly.”

Victoria’s eyes rolled.

“She’s nice for all of five minutes until she finds something that goes against her religion. Then you’re just another little heretical whore she’s superior to.”

“She’s not --- “

Victoria raised one of her hands, putting her index finger against her own lips.

“Shush.”

Max wrinkled her nose.

“Wait until tomorrow and see if she’s still all buddy buddy to you after she’s seen you with me. You think _I_ have spines? Just wait until you see her.”

Max looked back again to where Kate was, and thought back to in class, that scandalous look she had when she saw Max addressing Victoria. Victoria being right about this didn’t sit right with her, but …

“Hey Vic. Who’s this chick?”

Another new voice, and _jeez Max, stop spacing out for like five minutes, please._

When her head swung back, she saw a scraggly man with a hard set jaw, crazy intense eyes, and some brown hair with as much attention paid to it as Victoria’s.

He had a good foot of height on Max, and it didn’t look like the bright red varsity jacket he was wearing fit him quite right.

She couldn’t really read his expression or body language. Max always had more trouble figuring out men, but he was especially opaque to her.

He was a little stiff, like parts of his body weren’t assembled correctly. His hands were shoved into the pockets on his jacket.

He sniffed through his nostrils a little too frequently and it was a little too noticeably loud.

The way his eyes seemed to be looking _through_ her instead of _at_ her is what had Max most unsettled, though.

He didn’t blink enough. Max found it difficult to meet his gaze.

Max unconsciously moved closer to Victoria.

Victoria looked to Max, then back to the new face.

“Nathan. This is Max.”

Something like recognition passed through his face, and his expression softened. His lips even curled up into a soft smile.

Most importantly, his eyes stopped doing that _thing_. Max let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding in.

Did he always give strangers that look …?

“Oh.”

His hands came out of his pockets to rest by his sides in loose fists. His posture straightened.

Max could look him in the eyes now.

She knew this emotion.

Happy.

Content.

”If you’re cool with Vic, then you’re cool with me.”

He looked to Victoria.

”You comin’ or we bailing?”

“I’m coming. I was just catching up. Talk to you later, Max.”

“Yeah. Talk to you later, Victoria.”

Max watched them walk together until they rounded a corner and were out of sight.

Numbly, she pulled up her own agenda to see where she was supposed to be.

Free. She had an hour of free time, then a class that took her right up to lunch time.

Perfect.

Some time to go lay down outside and just figure out everything was just what the doctor ordered.

She made her way outside.

If she was being honest, thinking about it more really wasn’t making it any less strange.

She’d been laying here for a good half hour, listening to the chilliest Sufjan Stevens mix tape that existed _in the world,_ and just tried to fit all of the pieces together.

Kate. Victoria. Nathan. Chloe. Rachel. Taylor.

Taylor. Right. She’d probably want to know about the exchange with Victoria.

Max rolled onto her side and pulled out her phone and that little piece of paper from earlier. She tapped out a quick message.

 _Hey Taylor, it’s max_ , _tori is chill w/ me now ^_^_

_Already? Damn girl, u quick. Give me the deets tonite, k? will come to ur room_

_Ok!_

Max realized only a bit too late that she had used her personal pet name for Victoria with Taylor.

She felt a flush rush to her cheeks.

At least Taylor didn’t seem to notice.

Max would probably get _hyper_ -murdered if Victoria ever saw that.

And for some reason, that silly, morbid thought had her giggling like an idiot.

It felt nice to not be ignored by her anymore.

It really had been so many years now.

It was hard.

But more than that, Nathan looked so … happy? after knowing who she was.

All of these years, and Victoria wasn’t saying terrible things about her behind her back?

Maybe Victoria felt bad for being such an awful friend.

That’d be something else.

A remorseful Victoria Chase.

She didn’t think her initial meeting with Jefferson went poorly, either.

Max couldn’t help but to come off as scatterbrained, what with immediately disengaging after starting a conversation, but, at least she didn’t trip over her own words or anything.

That just left tonight, with Rachel and Chloe.

If that went down even kind of like how the rest of this day had, that would turn out just fine, too.

Maybe she could even unpack these stupid jealous feelings with Taylor or Victoria and not worry Chloe about it at all.

Max closed her eyes with a content sigh. All of those anxieties seemed so trivial now …

 

When she opened her eyes next her phone was screeching at her again.

She should have known better to lay down when sleep-deprived. 

She pulled up her agenda.

What was her next class?

_Chemistry?_

Did she really need to go that?

It was so comfortable here …

_No. Bad Max. Be good._

The boring, responsible side of her won this battle.

She got up, stretched, and patted down her clothes to shake off any loose grass clinging to it.

Time to be a responsible college student.

She made it to her next class.

Max frowned when she got into the class room.

This one was much larger – it could probably fit about 100 students.

The layout was slanted, so that students farther back sat up higher.

And it was still all gray everywhere – what was the point of going to an art school if they made everything so offensively bland?

She took a seat near the front.

Most of the science-y subjects were not her strong suit and she could use any advantage she could get.

The teacher was up front on a raised platform, talking with some students quietly.

It didn’t seem like she was late here either.

Score.

“Yo!”

For the second time today she almost had a heart attack.

Max really needed to pay more attention to her surroundings.

Carefully, she turned her attention to the source of the voice – a young man who had decided to choose the seat right next to her.

_Why …?_

There was plenty of free seats all around her. He didn’t have to ---

_Oh, duh, Max, he’s trying to make friends. Be nice._

She put on her best smile.

“Hi. I’m Max.”

“Awesome! I’m Warren.”

Like Chloe, this guy was just full of excited, nervous energy.

He grinned all of the time, too. His hair was just as lazy and unkempt as Max’s.

He had an endearing graphic printed onto his tee – a cat reading a book titled _World Domination (for cats)_.

Her smile felt more genuine now. It helped that he was kind of cute, too.

His eyes looked down to the bag by her feet, then back to her. Somehow, his grin consumed even more of his face.

“I couldn’t help but notice that pin on your bag … you like _Final Fantasy_ , don’t you?”

_Oh my god._

Max spent the next however many minutes gushing with Warren.

He was into every little weird niche geeky thing she was into. They didn’t really have the time to go into much depth about Warren’s crazy fan theories, but Max knew she wanted to hear them.

Later.

After class, they exchanged numbers.

She was way too booked to talk to him again today.

Maybe tomorrow? She had a free period.

He tried to hug her goodbye.

That was _kind of_ weird.

The rest of her classes went by with her paying less attention – since she knew the material – and less interesting people in them.

She picked up a few names, but knew she would probably forget them later.

After all of her classes, she got back to her room and basically collapsed onto her bed, folding like a wet piece of paper.

She didn’t even bother to collapse face-up, and the thoroughly undignified posture didn’t bother her in the slightest.

The reasonable part of her told her she’d get cramps if she stayed like this.

Warm. Relaxing. Soft.

She closed her eyes.

_No. Bad Max. You’re meeting Rachel and Chloe soon. You’re going to totally oversleep._

But the sensible part of her mind didn’t have any power here. This was sleepy Max’s domain.

She was out like a light before she had another thought.

 

The sensible part of her was right, of course.

Sleepy Max was greedy with sleep and wanted far more than a power nap.

She didn’t wake up to her phone this time, but instead to the barely-restrained giggling in the ether above her.

People were in her room. She should have probably locked her door before she passed out.

She groaned, forcing herself up into a sitting position with eyes that didn’t want to open, muscles that didn’t want to move, and a brain that was still in la-la land.

She blinked like she was trying on new eyes as they focused on her intruders.

Of course, it was Chloe, and …

Rachel.

Max’s eyes widened and her mouth was gaping before she could stop it.

Chloe really wasn’t kidding – Rachel was drop-dead gorgeous.

She had this indomitable aura around her, a kind of giddy, but well-controlled energy.

If Chloe was jittery and imprecise, Rachel was exacting and just.

Chloe’s moves were jumpy and exaggerated – everything Rachel did was intentional and fluid.

Chloe giggled again, but started first.

“C’mon dude, don’t ogle my girlfriend so obviously.”

“Awww Chloe, relax. We just woke her up. I’d be more concerned if she was coherent right now.”

Max was just starting to get into the details of Rachel’s face and hair before fully absorbing their words.

She had the decency to blush furiously when her mind caught up, and looked down to the floor, at her shoes.

“See, look what you did!”

“Me?! Excuse you! You’re the one that made her speechless.”

Max forced her brain to work.

_Come on Max, first impressions matter._

Not that Rachel seemed to mind - of course she would relish in her embarrassment, just like Chloe.

Max stood up, but this was foolish of her, and her punishment was to almost fall over as soon as was up.

Tired legs didn’t want to work like that, and her horrible sleeping posture had left her cramped all over.

Chloe shoved a hand on Max’s arm to steady her.

“Woah there, tiger. You’re really tired, aren’t you? You sure you’re still up for this?”

Finally, Max forced her throat to make words. Her smile that followed it was genuine, but the haze and tire in her eyes was just as genuine and unmistakable.

“Y-yeah. I just … uh… O-overslept, and …”

 _Eloquent, Max_.She looked at Chloe with pleading eyes, hopeful her friend could fill in the gaps.

“Aren’t used to waking up with two hot girls admiring how dainty and elegant you are when you’re sleeping, of course.”

Max groaned and rolled her eyes. They both giggled.

If nothing else, Chloe’s terrible jabs was doing wonders for waking her up.

Max ran her hand through her hair to smooth out some of the bedhead.

Chloe sensed Max was good enough to support her own weight, and pulled away.

Max had hoped that the reverie she felt a few moments ago was just due to literally just waking up and being caught off-guard, and wasn’t just going to be an enduring thing whenever she was near Rachel.

She turned her attention back to her.

Nope. Still gorgeous. Damn.

_Focus, Max._

Rachel’s arms were crossed, and she had found a nice wall to lean up against, but nothing about her posture read stress, dissatisfaction, or boredom.

Her smile was warm and her eyes danced in subtle ways whenever Max’s own met them.

Casually, Rachel raised a hand to push an errant strand of brown hair away from her face.

Rachel’s hair was long, straight, and well-maintained.

Max was envious of it.

“So uh. That was embarrassing. I’m Max. Hi.”

“Oh you don’t even know embarrassing yet. Chloe’s got some _amazing_ stuff on her phone and …”

Max’s hackles shot up.

“What!”

The two erupted in boisterous laughter, cackling like the evil little hyenas they were.

Max only just now realized how much they really were a match for one another – and by that, she meant they were both terrible awful people who were going to tease her well beyond the point her face would be totally covered in blush and it wasn’t fair at all since _one Chloe was bad enough_.

“Oh jeez, I’m just kidding. Hi Max. I’m Rachel.”

Well. At least Rachel knew when to throw Max a bone. Max tried to find a topic that wasn’t going to result in more humiliation.

“S-so uh. What are we doing? Dinner?”

“Duh.”

Chloe chimed in and raised up a bag and -- _wow Max how did you totally miss that_ – she could smell tacos.

“Ooh! Tacos!”

The tacos were great. They spent the next hour or so just catching up, and, despite her horribly embarrassing introduction, Max felt like she was going to get along just fine with Rachel.

She was pretty sure the blush wasn’t going away anytime soon, though. It was a good thing both of them found it endearing.

Eventually they finished their food, and the conversation died down. Chloe got up first, collecting the garbage and shoving it in the bag from whence it came in an uncharacteristically fastidious manner.

“Oooh, good girl. I’ve got you so whipped.”

Rachel’s quip came as Chloe finished. It unbalanced her.

“S-shut up.”

 _Well, at least I’m not the only one that gets flustered by Rachel._ Max grinned stupidly, content now that the attention wasn’t on her. But she kept quiet, lest they both decide to focus on her again.

“Anyway, Max. This was awesome. We should chill again soon.”

Chloe seemed to have Max’s same strategy of trying to distract the teasing onto another topic. Max was happy to oblige her friend.

“Yeah, definitely. I miss just being able to … you know, hang? It’s been so long, Chloe.”

“Don’t I know it.”

Chloe grinned.

“Well, you’re stuck here for a while. So I’m totally installing like … a bean bag chair ...”

“Chloe.”

“You know, liven up the place a bit.”

“Chloe.”

“You know what? Some posters would be good too. I’m thinkin’ some naked ladies.”

“ _Chloe._ ”

“Maybe some kissing … “

“Chloe!”

“What!”

“You’re the worst!”

They all shared a laugh. Chloe and Rachel made their way to the door. Max got up to follow and see them out.

Chloe opened the door first, and almost ran thoughtlessly into Victoria as she started on her way out.

Thankfully, she had the presence of mind to stop before then, and instead just stopped with a dumb, shocked look on her face.

Victoria wasn’t alone. Nathan was right next to her. Nathan wore his shock and confusion openly. Victoria was like a stone.

Rachel was the only one who seemed happy about this.

Max started to panic.

Her relationship with Victoria was way too fragile at this point to risk Chloe and Rachel getting too cheeky. Nathan was a totally unknown element, too. She needed to diffuse this before it became a “situation”.

“Victoria?!”

“Chloe.”

“Victoria.”

“Rachel.”

“Max …?”

_Breathe in. Puff your chest out. Think about what you’re going to say. Be assertive._

The voices were jumbled in Max’s ears.

It didn’t matter.

She shoved her way through Chloe and Rachel to stand between the two groups, and pointedly ignored Chloe’s attempts to get her attention.

Her brain had come up with a satisfactory excuse for once.

Or at least she hoped.

“Thanks, Victoria, but I don’t need that photography book. I found a copy online. But thank you _sooo_ much for the help.”

Victoria paused.

Nathan looked to Victoria, then to Max.

Thankfully, he was still going with the not-soul-piercing-gaze.

Max hoped her expression was enough to sell.

Victoria wore confusion for a tenth of a second before she caught on – then sighed a quiet moment to herself in relief at the easy out of this situation.

“Very well. We’ll see you tomorrow then, Max. Come on, Nathan.”

Nathan scoffed.

“Yeah, whatever.”

As they turned to walk away Max turned around and took a step or two back.

Rachel was still grinning. Max wondered if she ever stopped, or if it was some kind of defense mechanism, like Victoria had.

Chloe watched them walk away with open shock. Her mouth was still gracefully agape.

“Chloe ...?”

Max tried.

“Dude.”

Chloe’s voice was quiet and soft and very un-Chloe-like. The color had drained out of her face.

“You did not tell me it was _that_ Victoria.”

 _Oh_.

“Didn’t I …?”

Max sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck, thinking back to all of the prior conversations.

Victoria’s last name had never really been all that relevant.

Chloe probably thought Max’s “Victoria” was still in Seattle.

“You just … I can’t… With… Victoria!”

Chloe didn’t find words easy by now, apparently. Rachel decided to intervene.

“Alright, that’s enough fun for tonight. Come on dear, stop ogling so obviously at Max’s girlfriend.”

The wry echo of Chloe’s own words and the accusation had them both groaning. Max was going to protest, but Chloe beat her to it.

“Max we --- we have to talk about this.”

“ _Later._ ”

Rachel insisted, now physically moving her smaller girlfriend out of the way and back towards their own room.

Rachel shot Max a look she couldn’t quite figure out while she hauled the constantly protesting Chloe off.

When the door to the stairs had closed and everyone was out of sight, Max’s brain started working again.

 _Well_.

That didn’t go as bad as it could.

At least seeing how happy Rachel and Chloe made one another eased some of her _stupid_ feelings.

Max went back into her own room, closed her door, and flopped down on her bed.

She found her phone to check what she had missed while she was out cold.

A long series of texts from Chloe asking about where she was before their meeting.

They weren’t actually supposed to meet in Max’s room, originally.

Another text from an unknown number asking much the same thing – Rachel, she figured out from the contents.

Then a recent one. From Victoria.

She gulped.

_You owe me an explanation. Meet me tomorrow at lunch. I’m buying. No hipster food._

Max tried very hard to ignore the very persistent part of her mind that was stuck on repeat – _date date date you have a date with Victoria tomorrow –_ and tried to come up with a reply that didn’t sound lame.

_ok!_

Keyword being “try”.

Max splayed out on the bed with a deep, tired sigh. Even though she had napped a lot today, she was still tired as can be.

She slept fitfully and erratically last night – she was lucky she didn’t sleep right through all of her alarms.

She started pawing at her clothes to get them off.

Now she had some time to start wondering just why Victoria was right outside of Max’s room.

This was the only room at the end of the hall.

They couldn’t have been trying to visit anyone else.  

This level was for freshmen.

Victoria wasn’t.

Was she trying to chill out?

Reconnect?

Better introduce her to Nathan?

Unannounced? At night?

Were they trying to get into her room when she wasn’t home?

Victoria had her number.

For a while, they were in daily communication. Victoria knew how to talk to Max.

How hard was it to let her know she was on the way?

And Chloe’s reaction.

She looked so defeated. Betrayed?

Max couldn’t find exactly the right words to put with the face, but it put a worried pit in her stomach.

This information clearly was upsetting Chloe.

Max hoped it was out of shock and frustration that Max had somehow omitted Victoria’s last name and not out of some hatred or distaste for Victoria.

That would just … complicate things.

Max suddenly stopped stripping off her outer layer of clothing right when her skinny jeans were about to thigh level.

_Taylor._

She was supposed to come over tonight.

Max really desperately wanted to shower and just sit under some hot water for a little while though, and she wasn’t going to put back on these clothes after that.

Taylor probably wasn’t going to be scandalized by a night gown, she decided. She was still basically a stranger but probably knew more about Max already than most people did.

She kicked off her jeans while fishing for her phone again.

_I’ll be ready to talk in 30 minutes, meet me then_

It wasn’t going to actually take her 30 minutes to shower, but she definitely was going to be taking a long shower, and didn’t entirely trust herself to not fall asleep for a few moments in the calming waters.

She found her bag full of soaps and shampoos and made her way to the shared showers.

 

After she turned the water on, she cranked the heat up and stepped back.

_Yes._

This was exactly what she needed.

She spent entirely too long with her head craned back, just soaking up the aggressively warm waters and breathing deeply.

After what felt like hours, she washed her hair and skin with actual soap and shampoo, then after just a few more moments of soaking up, she killed the water and dried off.

Back in her room, she found the largest tee shirt in her closet and put it on.

It came down to her knees and kept her plenty decent, while being comfortable enough to sleep in.

On the flip side, it was so large and spacious it made her look like an 8-year-old.

She took a comb to her hair while waiting for Taylor to come – right after the shower was usually the only time her hair was well and truly reigned in.

Max heard knocking on her door. She put the comb away, ambled over, opened the door, and let Taylor in.

Taylor took a seat on Max’s couch. Max sat down on her bed.

It was too quiet at first. Taylor was gently smiling but not quite comfortable around Max yet. She did come prepared, though.

“So … Tori?”

_Well, crap. She did notice._

Max opened her mouth, but, nothing quite came out.

She could feel the heat on her checks.

Taylor’s eyes were bright and her smile was now wide, she was clearly excited.

“Yeah, uh. I used to call Victoria that back when we knew each other.”

“It’s _soooooo_ cute.”

Taylor was practically squealing.

Max shook her head and sighed.

“That was years ago, Taylor. Victoria has only started talking to me again, today, remember? I just slipped up, is all. I’ve been operating on like two hours of sleep all day.”

Taylor’s excitement dulled.

Max could have sworn she was even pouting a little at the news, like she really wanted Max to be on pet-name territory with Victoria already.

“Anyway, what did you even want to talk about? It seems like Victoria has told you everything about me and her already.”

Taylor shook her head.

“Not everything. She didn’t tell me why she got mad at you in the first place.”

Max flinched.

She crossed her arms.

Taylor’s expression fell a little further.

“And you expect me to tell you? Victoria’s your friend, and confided in you everything but that. She clearly doesn’t want you to know.”

Taylor put her hands up in a classic “I surrender” and sighed.

“You make it sound so awful, Max. It’s not like I’m going to tell her that I know right after I asked you to try and be nice with her.”

Max fidgeted.

“Then why do you want to know?”

Taylor stood up, and took a few steps closer to Max. She brought her smile back.

“I want to know if you were as important to her as I’m theorizing.”

Max’s mouth did the thing where it opened and refused to talk again.

_What was that supposed to mean?_

Taylor sensed she had lost Max, and hesitated before continuing.

“If you killed her cat or something, then I’m totally over thinking everything. But I don’t think you killed her cat, Max. I think you got too close to her, and it freaked her the fuck out.”

Max bit her lower lip.

Victoria’s words from earlier came back – _You scared me, Max_ – and a few pieces started to fall into place. 

Taylor’s theory made sense.

She could at least know the basics.

“Promise me you won’t tell her? Or the tori thing?”

“Yes yes of course! Spill it, girl!”

“Alright, alright. Fine. You win.”

Taylor inched closer. She was practically grinning from ear to ear as sat next to Max.

“I tried to kiss her.”

“I knew it!”

Taylor was jittering with all kinds of happy energy. Her hands were up in loosely-clenched fists by her chest.

“You knew it?”

“Well I didn’t know _exactly_ that you tried to kiss her. But like I said, I think you had gotten too close to her. Plus, I was about ninety percent sure Victoria is a lesbian.”

Max shook her head again.

“No, she’s definitely not. I said I _tried_ to kiss her. I didn’t get to. She saw what was coming and cut me off. She told me very clearly that she wasn't.”

“Eeeh …”

Taylor made a weird kind of noncommittal noise. Her hands fell back down onto her lap.

Did she really not believe her? What was the point in even asking Max if she was just going to doubt it?

“Is that all? You just up and randomly tried to kiss her one day?”

Max shook her head.

“No, there’s more to it than that but … it’s not the best part of my life to relive. No offense, but I don’t really know you yet, and that’s too personal for now.”

Max fidgeted.

“Can we talk about it later?”

“Oh! Sure. I didn’t even --- Sorry, Max.”

“Yeah.”

Max tried to relax.

Taylor wasn’t trying to make her uncomfortable or depressed.

More than a little nosey, but Max wondered if Taylor had more skin in this game than she was letting on.

“So what happened today with Victoria?”

This was easier to talk about, at least.

“Oh. Um. She was in my intro to photography class and ---“

“Your what? _Intro_ to photography?”

“Yeah, why?”

“ _Duh_. She’s not a freshman, Max.”

Max blinked. Of course she’s not a freshman, why –

 _Oh_.

Victoria shouldn’t have been in that class.

“Veeeeeeery Intereeeeeeeesting. Please go on.”

Max’s head was still reeling. How did she not notice that sooner?

Taylor was giving her this expectant look though – her eyes were hungry for more. Max had to focus.

“Anyway. Uh. We met after class. It didn’t start out wonderfully, but she wanted to be ‘acquaintances’ by the end of it. Then she got upset at Kate for staring at us and Nathan appeared. He kinda creeped me out until Victoria told him who I was, then it was like he was a totally different person. Then just an hour ago she was right outside my door – with Nathan – and I had to cover for her.”

Taylor looked confused.

“Why would you have to do that?”

“Because Chloe and Rachel were in my room.”

“Rachel was in your room?”

“Yeah?”

“ _Max_. Rachel is totally Victoria’s arch-nemesis. Please don’t tell me they saw one another.”

“Y-yeah, they did. But, they made away without much incident. Victoria sent me this kinda angry text afterwards, demanding to meet her for lunch tomorrow and explain.”

Taylor murmured and paused.

“Wow, you had an exciting day, Max.”

They sat in companionable silence.

Taylor was trying to process all of what she just heard.

Max was trying to figure out how Victoria ended up in the same class as her.

She was also trying to fully figure out Taylor’s motivation in doing all of this.

Eventually, Taylor spoke.

“Well. It sounds like you have a date tomorrow with Victoria. And we need to make sure it goes well.”

Max’s hackles raised. She really didn’t need Taylor trying to set her up with Victoria.

“’We’? And why?”

“Yes, ‘we’. I have a vested interest in Victoria being happy. And she likes you, dummy.”

“So?”

Max’s words came out more forcefully than intended. She almost flinched at herself.

Taylor stiffened.

“Taylor, Victoria ignored me for _years_. A-and after we had gotten so close, too. Do you have any idea how badly that hurt? She was the only thing interesting in Seattle. Everything sucked without her.”

Taylor remained quiet. She found some part of Max’s floor interesting to look at.

“I’m not just going to --- ugh.”

Max was getting more and more flustered and frustrated. Her voice had this harsh quality and volume to it and she knew it was from anger. This was a wound that cut deep.

She couldn’t take it out on Taylor.

She took in a deep breath.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you, but I should probably get to bed now anyway, Taylor. I don’t want to be exhausted tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

Taylor’s voice was quiet and drained. She got up and made her way to Max’s door, with a little slump in her step.

Max felt a little guilty. Taylor meant well.

“Hey, uh. I’ll… text you tomorrow after I meet with Victoria, alright?”

“Alright, Max. … Thanks. Good night.”

“Good night.”

Taylor left. Max got up to secure her door, turn off the lights, and then crawl into bed.

The reasonable part of her protested.

There was no way she was going to sleep with all of the things that happened today.

She had to sit and think.

To flush out some of these angry bees.

But the reasonable part of her had underestimated sleepy Max again.

It wasn’t going to be like last night.

She fell asleep.


	2. Entangled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe won't let it happen again.
> 
> Victoria struggles with the ghost of her past.

Victoria was on auto-pilot.

She often was, but this morning was an extreme example.

Last night, Victoria had demanded that Max meet her at lunch to explain just what the hell she was doing with Rachel.

Late at night.

With that _stupid_ blush on her face.

With her hair all fucked up.

And those _stupid_ cute freckles.

In retrospect, it was a stupid thing to do.

The last thing Victoria wanted was to be with Max in any extended period of time.

It wasn’t because she hated Max.

The opposite, in fact.

At some point in their lives, they were literally inseparable.

Victoria knew exactly what her feelings were.

Like everything in life, her feelings were something that she had carefully mapped out, organized, and attempted to compartmentalize as much as possible.

A Chase didn’t let their emotions get the better of them.

A Chase didn’t get into a lesbian relationship.

But she knew she was becoming increasingly anxious and unbalanced.

She had made a plan earlier and Max had already ruined it by having other friends.

In hindsight, a text probably would have helped.

Her anxiety was flaring up in the most annoying ways.

She spent her entire morning basically fretting over every single detail and replaying various ideas she had for how to apologize.

She was so doomed.

Especially, thoroughly, unacceptably doomed.

But Victoria wasn’t Max.

No matter how deep into thought she got, she was always capable of functioning and her _situational awareness_ \- something she had tried very diligently to instill into Max all of those years ago - was always operating at peak efficiency.

 

Classes were suffered through quickly enough.

Max was too busy worrying about Kate to worry about her.

That was fine.

That would make this easier.

Nathan found her after her last class before lunch.

“Yo, V. You want to get a bite to eat?”

“No, Nate. I told you earlier; I’m having lunch with Max.”

He smiled.

“You going to apologize to her today?”

He was the only one who knew about her full, complete emotional involvement with Max.

He was about the only one that could be fully trusted with that information.

She sighed and rubbed at her forehead.

“I don’t know. I don’t think she’ll accept it. I've already been _kind of_ mean to her.”

It was the truth. Nathan frowned.

He leaned in closer.

“What, Max?”

He scoffed.

“I don’t know how you did it, V, but you managed to convince yourself the nicest girl in the school won’t accept your apology.”

Her eyes shot wide open and she opened her mouth to say something, but deep down she knew he was right.

Nathan didn’t know Max very well personally, but he knew about pretty well everything Victoria and Max had done together.

And he certainly knew about Max’s arresting, sometimes naïve, sometimes nosy-as-fuck compassion.

She looked away.

For a brief moment, she was able to put the worries about lunch out of her thoughts.

If a Chase ever showed their emotions, she’d be smiling.

She did need to find Max, though, it was getting close to that time.

“Come on. Let’s go find her. I am actually pretty hungry.”

“Yeah.”

She passed Taylor and Courtney on her way down the halls.

Courtney was nice, but ultimately a helpless push-over door mat. She didn’t provide Victoria with the push back she sometimes needed from her friends.

Taylor, on the other hand, was a good friend.

Victoria had almost fucked up and lost her too, because of course she did.

Ever since Victoria apologized after that, they were almost as close as she was with Nathan.

But Taylor had other issues.

She was incredibly incessant about knowing more about Max and Victoria had the nagging feeling she was either going to make a move on her herself or do something else incredibly stupid like spill all of the beans.

That wouldn’t do.

She couldn’t know the full story.

A Chase is always in control of the situation.

She gave them a wave. They came over. They chatted casually. She wasn’t paying attention.

Victoria kept her eyes on the door into the chemistry class.

She had extracted Max’s schedule out of her via another demanding text - so that Victoria could plan her morning perfectly - and knew Max was going to be out momentarily.

But Max didn’t come out alone.

She came out with nerd boy.

W-something.

Whammy.

_No, come on. You’re not even trying._

Warden.

_Maybe._

He _would_ have a dorky name like that. Named like a fucking video game character or something.

She frowned.

There was no way in hell Max was going to stand her up and go to lunch with _him_.

Nathan put a hand on her shoulder.

“That dude has no idea what personal space means. And he’s a total pussy. Squeeze him. He’ll squirm like a pig and she’s yours. She’ll pr’olly even thank you for it.”

She looked over to him with an eyebrow raised.

Nate took a sip from some soda she didn’t remember him getting. He released her shoulder.

Max could handle some creepazoid, couldn’t she?

_No, Victoria. She’ll be nice to him until the end of time. Max is nice to everyone. Even you._

Victoria accepted Nathan’s theory.

She bid her friends “au revoir” and made her way to the two.

Max saw her first.

Her eyes went wide.

There was this pleading look on her face after that momentary flash of panic.

Victoria had seen this look on Max's face before.

She was trying to remember where and when she last saw it.

“… so that’s why you’ve got to know how to handle the smaller tank, or your trash is going to get totally out of control, and you won’t be able to manage your aggro …”

Victoria frowned.

Warden was rambling about something totally incoherent.

Max was painfully polite and didn’t know how to disengage.

Victoria crossed her arms and took up her confident pose.

_Crush him._

“Beat it, nerd. Max is with me, now.”

“--- What? Hey – you can’t … just … ahh … ah! Uh, Hi. Victoria.”

Warden started to protest, but by the time he had turned around and realized who it was, the fight had totally left him.

_He knows who you are. How you only hurt people._

“I have lunch with Victoria, Warren.”

 _Warren_.

That’s what it was. And it was only slightly less dorky than Warden.

He should have been named that instead.

Warren shot Max the most hilarious look before laughing nervously.

“You! With Victoria. Uh. Wow. Okay. I’ll… see you later.”

“Right.”

Victoria burned holes in his head with her eyes until he got the fucking clue and left already.

“Uh, Thanks, Victoria. He’s really nice, but …”

Max was looking up to her with a warm smile. Victoria was definitely not noticing how her smile always seemed to change the contours of her face and freckles in the most endearing way possible.

Victoria rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“But he doesn’t know to take a hint.”

“Y-yeah… something like that…”

“Come on. I don’t want to stand in line for days.”

“Ah-alright.”

Max sounded really nervous.

She was impressively composed yesterday – she had this determined look on her face and steel in her voice. When she demanded that they talk, Victoria was caught totally off-guard.

For a moment, Victoria was worried that being a total bitch to her had changed her.

That having to deal with the literal worst friend in the world burned out that bright light of hope within her, and just left another broken husk of a human being.

Misery loves company.

But here she was.

The same nervous, apprehensive, nice-beyond-all-reasonable-measure girl she knew from Seattle.

Victoria deserved none of it.

Well, Max was the same, only she dressed better now. Victoria wasn’t going to complain about that.

 _Fuck_.

She suddenly remembered the last time she saw that look on Max's face.

When Victoria was bullying some idiot loser in high school.

Victoria tried to keep her breathing steady, but her anxiety was threatening to become overwhelming, now.

Max probably thought she was the biggest asshole in the world, still.

_You'll just hurt her, again._

She tried to shove that terrible part of herself down long enough to go through with lunch.

They both wanted salad.

One of the shops _had_ to sell salad that wasn’t talking about their hippy-dippy non-GMO stance.

Max’s pragmatic stance of “just pick one and go” wouldn’t work here.

This had to be perfect.

Victoria had perfectly planned a salad date before.

She'd go with that plan.

 

They found one, eventually, and placed basically the same order of Caesar salad.

Only Victoria wasn’t a literal fat piggy piggy, so she ordered it without any cheese and light on dressing.

Eating around Max kind of sucked now.

Max picked nervously at her food and had trouble keeping eye contact.

For some fucking reason Victoria couldn't help but keep her face as hard as a stone.

This felt like their first day in high school again.

Victoria thought she had changed.

Maybe she hadn’t.

After one particularly brave Crouton decided life was better in her wind pipe, Victoria was done eating.

Coughing it up was the least dignified thing in the world and she’d be damned if she had to do it twice.

She shoved her plate towards the center.

Most of the food was still there.

Maybe half.

She didn’t care.

Max looked worried.

She carefully looked up from her plate.

And puffed her chest out.

“You can eat the rest, Victoria. I’m not going to tell anyone you’re actually a human and need food.”

Was that sass?

Or humor?

_She spoke out of line. Show her the error of her ways._

Victoria gave her a glare.

Her response was entirely automatic now, from years of dealing with asshole friends.

“Hard pass. Have any other advice for turning me into a pig?”

But this wasn't the person she wanted to be to Max. 

There was a conflict there.

_No. Stop that. Be a fucking a normal person for once._

She tried to soften her look, but Max had already seen it and broke eye contact, looking down at her food miserably.

_Fuck. Good job, Mega-bitch. How many times have you made her sad, now?_

She tried to ignore her awful side.

It was difficult when it picked at the very things it encouraged her to do.

“I can’t help you if you don’t let me, Victoria.”

No, no, fucking --- not _that_ sentence ---

 

Victoria forced her thoughts to just stop for a few seconds.

Something Max had told her to do whenever they got into a fight was to breathe in deeply and count backwards.

Usually by the time she counted down from 20 Victoria wouldn’t even know why she was so upset.

She’d be able to think clearly and reasonably.

It probably wasn’t healthy.

But it’s saved her ass at least a few times now.

20.

“I just… Is it something I did to you? Is it something someone else did to you? What am I doing wrong, Victoria? Please tell me. I’m so tired of fighting you.”

Fucking _ow._

12.

“I thought maybe … maybe after all of that time, you’d meet someone else who was --- better --- for you, and then we could … fix… things. Not go back to how things were, I just --- … I don’t --- … I want my friend back, Victoria.”

2.

“Please.”

0.

“Max. I …”

The words wouldn’t come.

“You _what?_ ”

Max looked up.

Her eyes were puffy and red.

Her voice got harsh and severe.

It almost cracked on the last word – instead it just wavered. 

It sounded pathetic and intimidating at the same time and it was ripping Victoria’s heart to shreds.

Even in the process of calming herself down Victoria was fucking everything up.

“I didn’t mean to …”

Holy shit was that ever the wrong thing to say.

Max’s eyes looked like they lit on fire.

There was a deep anger in here, just waiting to be brought out to the world.

Of course Victoria stumbled onto the way to awaken it.

“You didn’t _mean_ to ignore me for years?”

The anger, the pain, the frustration, it was all mounting.

She could hear all of those years of neglect in every syllable.

It weighed down on Victoria’s throat and choked off her words.

The world was getting a little blurry.

She didn’t care.

She  _did_ care and that was the fucking root problem of everything.

“Well I – I meant –“

Victoria couldn't find her confident voice. The illusion was shattered, now.

“Why’d you even invite me to lunch? Did you just want to torture me for half an hour?”

Max sounded angry and sharp.

She should have.

“Max.”

Victoria tried again, but her voice was still unconvincing.

Max had enough.

She crossed her arms.

 

“No.”

 

_She finally learned what you do to people. You don't deserve her._

“I’m sorry.”

Victoria didn’t remember trying to force her mouth to move and get the words out, but they did anyway.

It was so quiet and miserable-sounding, though.

Max probably didn’t even hear it.

This is what she deserved.

Max upset at her.

Max showing everyone within earshot what a terrible person Victoria was.

Max standing up for herself.

Max shoving down the bully.

Victoria managed to make the nicest person in the world unable to accept her apology.

Victoria stood up and covered her face with her hand. She was crying. Probably. Whatever emotions she felt weren’t raw enough. Her feet couldn’t carry her away fast enough.

“Victoria.”

She looked up. Rachel was right there. Right in her way. Smiling as always. Was she just watching? Sadistic asshole. Probably about to rub it in.

Victoria opened her mouth to say something.

Rachel closed her eyes and bowed her head.

 

* * *

 

Victoria sat up with a wretched gasp of air.

Darkness was all around her.

Her heart was going a million miles an hour.

She was balmy and uncomfortable.

This comforter ---

Comforter. She was in bed. It was a dream.

 _Holy shit_.

What a vivid dream. Or nightmare. Or prediction? Yeah, what a way to figure out if you had magic powers.

She needed a goddamn cigarette.

Then she needed to make sure that day didn’t happen.

Not like that.

She didn’t deserve better, but Max did.

She didn’t know if she could live with herself if she heard that wavering pain in Max’s voice again.

Victoria found her goddamn cigarette and made her way outside. Cold weather be damned.

If Victoria’s dream-morning sucked, the actual one sucked even more.

If it was her actual one.

Maybe this was another dream too.

She’d ask Max to pinch her later.

But at least this time she was determined and not just idly freaking out.

She _had_ to apologize.

She _had_ to tear off the band aid and just deal with it.

Max could not buy it, Max could hate her, but if she got in an honest, straight-forward apology, without being a huge bitch beforehand, her conscience would be clear.

For the first time in like three years.

_That was your last warning, idiot. Stop fucking around and fix this._

 

* * *

 

Max woke up about an hour before her first class.

Max never woke up all that early naturally, but going to sleep at 10 probably helped.

She felt annoyingly chipper and thought it might be fun to do the same thing to Chloe did to her yesterday, since there was no way in hell Chloe was up this early.

The thought made her smile, but then she remembered her last contact with Chloe was her freaking out about Max being friends with _that_ Victoria.

She’d have to talk to Chloe today, but that would be a terrible way to broach it.

And Kate, while she was at it.

One way or another she was going to make all of this work, no matter how hard all of her friends tried to be enemies.

Max checked her phone.

Text from Victoria.

The timestamp was a little weird. What was she doing awake at 4am?

It wanted to know where and when they could meet up before lunch.

It wasn’t quite as demanding as the last one – she might even call it friendly.

That might just be chipper Max talking, though.

It took her a little while to find her agenda again. When she did, she quickly tapped out a message.

_I have an hour before lunch as free period on Wednesday and Friday. I’ll probably just be relaxing outside near my dorm. ^_^_

The reply came back almost immediately.

The speed of the reply had Max worried Victoria had been up all night.

Victoria was an early riser, but 4am was pretty extreme, even for her.

_Ok, will meet you at 11 there_

At 11?

Victoria must have really wanted to talk.

Max bit her bottom lip.

Was she going to be upset about Rachel?

Taylor mentioned that might be a pain point.

Or maybe Chloe?

Chloe certainly didn’t seem to like her, and Max doubted the feeling wasn’t mutual.

Victoria really didn’t have all that much to be mad about, Max decided.

 _She_ was the asshole.

 _She_ was the one who started ignoring Max.

 _She_ was the one who decided to deal with Max's bullshit feelings by her cutting her out of her life for good.

Max only hoped Victoria was just eager to patch things up, and not to stir up old wounds.

Her outburst to Taylor last night worried her about her ability to be composed about it.

Their relationship might be done for good if she lost her temper while Victoria broached it.

She _thought_ she was over it.

It's not like this was the first time she had thought about their relationship in all of these years.

It hadn't ever been quite so violent.

How long does it actually take to stop hurting after a heart break?

Maybe she was only numb since Victoria wasn’t around.

Maybe proximity with Victoria was stirring up things she'd rather try to forget.

But she couldn't spend all morning thinking about this.

Max considered being a lazy bones and enjoying being actually all rested up, but responsible Max had been biding her time and launched a coordinated effort to get her up and going.

It was almost like a second first day, since all of her classes were different on the alternate days. More new faces to meet.

She opened her closet again.

The Max that greeted her looked at least a year younger.

Amazing what some sleep could do.

She picked out more nice clothes.

She didn’t feel like she needed another shower, but she still had time to really comb down her hair again to get it to behave.

Today was going to be good, she thought.

Before Max really knew it, it was already 11.

She found a nice tree to lean against.

Victoria was usually pretty punctual, so she half-expected her to pop out from behind the tree and reprimand her for arriving at technically 11:02.

That’s not what happened, though.

A few minutes later, she saw Victoria leaving the girl’s dorm.

She scanned around until she found Max, then made a bee line for her.

Max was smiling.

Victoria stopped a few feet shy of Max.

Max almost frowned when she got a better look.

Victoria looked like she didn’t sleep very well – but probably only to Max herself, since she was freakishly good at covering up things like that with makeup.

“Hi Victoria.”

“Max.”

Now Max was getting a little worried.

Victoria’s tone was soft and gentle.

She didn’t keep eye contact.

“Can we go to your room? I want to talk privately. Nathan’s crashed in mine.”

Max looked around.

They were in public, sure, but it’s not like there was a lot of people hanging on their every word.

Still, if this sober Victoria wanted privacy…

They made their way back to her room.

Victoria didn’t say a single word until the door to Max’s room was closed.

Max decided to lock it, just in case Chloe thought it’d be funny to crash in on her room or something.

Like Max definitely wasn’t thinking of doing earlier.

Max slowly approached Victoria, who had made her way into the center of Max’s room.

“Your room hasn’t changed much.”

When Victoria turned around, she was softly smiling.

Max should have taken a picture.

Victoria’s soft smile with her perfect appearance and just the correct amount of light coming from Max’s mostly-closed blinds would make for a beautiful shot. Victoria’s facial expressions were so beautiful when she wasn’t trying to hide them.

“What’s this about, Victoria?”

Max tried to keep her tone as gentle as she could.

Whatever had Victoria more pensive and less bitchy she didn’t want to interrupt.

“I’ve been thinking.”

“Yeah?”

“For a while.”

“Yeah …”

“Max. I’m so sorry. I shouldn't have ignored you.”

Max closed her eyes.

She put her bag down, since that was still on her for some reason, and breathed out slowly.

She opened her eyes.

“I’ve been waiting a long time to hear that.”

Victoria bit her lip.

“I forgive you, Victoria, but … 3 years is a long time. What am I to you anymore? You have new friends now. You never wanted me for …”

Max trailed off. She took a few steps closer.

Victoria sat down on Max’s bed. She crossed her arms.

“I don’t know.”

Max flinched.

"But it's something more than a friend, and it has been for a long time."

Max felt a little breathless, but didn't have the words to respond.

She was trying to fit this Victoria in with the one that had fought with her and started to ignore her.

If it wasn't for that one night ... Max would have believed her instantly. 

Victoria continued.

“It was just so easy to not think about it, you know?”

Max considered her words some more.

She took a seat on the bed with her, and looked off at a wall.

She didn't know what she was with Victoria.

She really never thought about what she was with Chloe, either.

She was pretty sure you weren’t allowed to have crushes on your best friends.

She couldn’t really genuinely call any of her friends a “girlfriend” either.

Just the word itself made Max a little nervous.

Victoria was pretty damn close to that, though.

Maybe her relationships were destined to fall in areas where labels didn’t quite fit.

Maybe the labels didn’t really matter.

Life was just weird like that, she decided.

Something was eating away at Max.

Planting these awful seeds in her.

She had to know.

About that night.

“Okay. But... I want to know something.”

Victoria never stopped looking away from Max.

“What happened when I tried to kiss you?”

Victoria’s eyes widened.

Her face went white.

“Max, I --- That’s ---“

Max put her hands up.

“If it’s difficult, I’ll understand. I just … I’ve thought about it a lot.”

Victoria gulped.

Her eyes flickered around, looking for something in Max’s own.

Victoria’s arms uncrossed and she placed both of her hands in her own lap.

Max stayed quiet.

She gave her time.

Victoria broke eye contact to look down at the floor.

“I don’t have a good answer.”

“I don’t want a good answer. I want to know what happened.”

Max paused.

“Remember the first time we fought?”

Victoria laughed dryly and distantly.

“Not very well. Just that I was a bitch, as usual.”

Max tried very hard not to grin.

“A specific kind, though. You wouldn’t tell me what was bothering you. I couldn’t help you when you didn’t let me.”

Victoria sucked in a deep breath.

That damn line.

It haunted her in her dreams, but when the flesh and blood Max said it, it wasn’t an emotional bludgeon.

She was sincere. Warm. Caring.

Max deserved to know.

Max deserved so many things.

“I don’t think I ever deserved your friendship, Max. You’re the nicest person I’ve ever met and I’m just … Miserable. Awful. Mean.”

Max’s nose wrinkled.

“So you sabotaged it?”

“N-not consciously. Just it manifested in weird ways. I’d wake up, you’d be in my room, sometimes even my b-bed, and I’d have to spend like ten minutes reassuring myself that yeah, you were here, and yeah, you chose to be. I felt so funny around you during that last half of the year ...”

Victoria frowned.

“I ... knew what it was. I told my parents about it. They told me Chase women don’t feel like that for other women.”

Max sucked in a harsh breath.

“Assholes.”

She couldn’t help herself. The faintest of smile on Victoria’s face told her she hadn’t made a mistake, though.

“Yeah …”

Victoria paused.

It took a while before she wanted to talk again.

The silence was companionable.

Max wasn’t extracting this information out of her to gossip.

This was healing.

This was them reconnecting.

“So then you tried to kiss me, and … everything just came together at once. I couldn't feel like this for you. I didn’t deserve you. Easiest way out was to just fuck it up and make you hate me. I really want to say I didn’t mean to, but … Yeah, I fucked it up. I fucked it up so hard I spent the next three years wondering how I could be such an awful person to you.”

Victoria sighed severely.

"I just want to be able to talk to you again, Max. I don't really know how you feel about me ... b-but I want to be everything I can, to you. Whatever that is."

Victoria was having some difficulty keeping her voice even.

Max was stunned.

Not just from the revelation that Victoria had kept all of that from her for so long, but now, that she wanted everything back.

Max didn't know what to say.

“Victoria …”

Max's words were soft and gentle.

Victoria looked at Max again.

Max lost her breath.

Victoria had some tears in her eyes.

Any harshness in her face was totally gone.

It was rare to see Victoria so vulnerable.

She always put up so many walls, so many layers of contingency, so many threads of plausible deniability.

She wasn’t always like that.

When they first met, Victoria actually was trying to calm Max down after being bullied for being the awkward new kid.

She was helpful and kind. She taught Max how to dress and carry herself so others respected her.

But something happened.

Her parents kept turning up the pressure on her.

What first started as Victoria comforting Max soon became mutual. Victoria needed someone who cared as much as Max did.

Evidently parental pressure also caused Victoria to be afraid of this connection she felt with Max.

The less connected she felt to Victoria, the more she noticed the spines and walls. 

They’d been steadily growing and building as a defensive mechanism to the expectations, and were reinforced by her social groups.

It was painful to watch Victoria slowly shut off emotionally from the world and become so mean and bitter, particularly after they stopped talking.

It wasn’t the Victoria she knew. It wasn’t the Victoria she tried to kiss.

Victoria didn’t have to be that person.

Max wanted her old friend back, and these glimpses of vulnerability and gentleness told Max that it still lived within Victoria, desperate for another real emotional connection to let it breathe freely.

It’d be a little skewered from how curated Victoria’s spines were, but they could work on that.

“Can I hug you?”

Despite it all, Victoria gently smiled again.

“I think I’d like that very much, Max Caulfield.”

Max still wasn’t really sure what they were to each other.

At some point they had fell asleep on her bed nestled together.

No tense expectations.

Friends don't sleep like this, and she knew it all the way back in high school, but.

The labels didn’t matter.

They were people and they enjoyed being around each other, again.

Max could get used to this.

She woke up before Victoria.

Max really wasn’t all that tired anyway.

She made sure to get a selfie with them in bed, just carefree.

She always had a camera near her bed.

She hadn't really used it in a while.

Victoria still owed her another bed selfie, anyway.

The picture was nice.

The exposure wasn’t quite right. The focus was too shallow. How on earth did she manage that? Victoria had a dumb look on her face whenever she slept. Max’s hair managed to get messed up. Her smile was uneven. Max looked like she was stoned or something.

This picture wouldn’t see the light of day.

But it was nice. She was keeping it.

They still had time for lunch.

So that’s what they did.

They picked the first place that offered salads and didn’t have a crazy long line since they went to lunch far too late, and ordered the same thing. Caesar Salad.

Victoria didn’t even remember why she was upset at Max for being with Rachel last night.

It probably didn’t matter.

It wasn’t tense.

They both wolfed their meal down.

Victoria laughed at Max’s dumb jokes.

Victoria smiled.

Max made sure she got a picture of it this time.

There were too many people in the background. She hadn’t gotten the focus to blur them out entirely. She really should have shot wide open with a subject so close. It was too bright. Victoria had some food on her face.

This picture wouldn’t see the light of day.

But it was nice. She was keeping it.

 

* * *

 

Nathan woke up to a lot of weird shit in his life.

One time one of his idiot friends fell asleep ass up. It was hilarious to everyone else. They put little bunny ears on it. Glued a carrot onto his pants. Made an ass snowman.

It was funnier in the moment.

His friends were assholes.

Point is, he wasn’t expecting to wake up to V and Max sitting together on V’s bed.

Last night V was _pissed_ about Rachel being in Max’s room, and for their plan falling through.

She had him crash in her room just so she had something to vent at for the night.

It was fine. He needed her for that sometimes too. She always was better in the morning. So was he. He was pretty sure it was natural. Natural enough, anyway.

Max was staring at him. What else was new.

But V didn’t sound like she was going to do anything that she needed to today.

She was so negative.

There was no way she was going to work up the nerve to apologize.

She’d probably be a total bitch and ruin everything, without him. Or she'd chicken out at the last second.

She’d come to him.

They’d become more isolated from the rest of the school. Just like in that fucked-up dream he had.

This goddamn couch wasn’t comfortable.

He was up late last night since what else do you do late at night and she was tossing and turning in bed. Looked fuckin’ miserable. Nightmares, probably.

Max was looking into his eyes for something. She could keep whatever she found.

V probably didn’t even believe Max would accept it. V would think like that. No self-esteem.

Nathan wasn’t any better.

But he was doing that thing again.

Staring wordlessly.

He must have gotten up a minute ago, and hadn't moved or done much sense.

Max shifted around on the bed.

She hadn’t looked away from him since.

She wasn’t quite comfortable around him yet.

Most people weren't.

But she could deal.

V was looking at some photos.

They were those old-fashioned polaroid kind of photos. From like 19-fucking-80.

Since when did V take those? She’d probably spontaneously combust if she touched a vinyl record.

Max was nice. Too nice. Painfully nice. V was too spiny and broken for someone as innocent as Max.

But that was V and Max’s decision. If V wanted it, there was no chance in hell he was going to ruin it. 

“Did you guys fuck yet?”

He knew perfectly well V's attraction to Max.

It just seemed natural that they'd have some great make-up sex afterwards.

They both blushed.

Max was trying not to giggle.

That was good.

She looked terrified shitless earlier.

Maybe V had explained his weirdness to her already.

He had to make sure anything that got close to V wasn’t going to do more harm than good.

 _Fuck,_ maybe that’s how Max looked when terrified.

He saw weirder before.

He might encourage some things.

He’d be lying if he said he never thought about them being together again.

V said she was always really chaste.

Of course. V comes out as a lesbian and it’s with the most boring one in the universe. Not that he didn't already know.

She deserved to live more there.

No one could fuckin’ touch her at their parties.

Maybe Max would be a real live wire with some drugs in her.

He should tell V he liked men too, sometime.

Take a picture of her fuckin’ look.

It’d probably be priceless.

Not like she was going to have any room to be a bitch about it.

Not when she was attracted to this one-plaid-jacket-way-from-being-a-walking-goddamn-stereotype.

V looked up from the photos to shoot him daggers. He expected that. But then she softened. That he didn’t expect.

What was Max getting out of this, anyway?

V and him kept each other sane in this shit world.

What good did Max get to be exposed to that?

Maybe she was fucked up too, and good at hiding it.

Like Rachel.

Maybe Max’s kink was fucked-up people.

That Chloe girl had issues for days.

Fuckin’ Mohawk was hot though.

She was more like a dude than a chick.

Probably all of those skaters she hung out with.

Maybe everyone was fucked up.

Maybe being with fucked up people is how Max was so nice.

Knew what it was like to be in their shoes. Empathy.

V seemed to second-guess whatever vitriolic missile she had lined up to fire at him.

She hesitated for far too long.

This was new.

Max rubbed at V’s arm.

That was new too.

“No.”

Clothes, he thought.

Max probably got clothes out of the affair.

That’s something girls liked, right?

V said she dressed like ass before they met.

She looked fine now.

Little bit like one of V’s friends.

With a little work, V could probably wear Max on her arm at one of those fancy galleries.

The “no” was all that V gave him.

It wasn’t forceful.

It wasn’t mean.

It was flat, maybe even a little playful, and V even smiled gently afterwards.

He found himself mirroring.

She rarely smiled.

Never with anyone else around.

He was pretty sure she had botox’d the shit out of her face at one point.

But then she wouldn’t be able to scowl right, so he quickly dismissed that idea.

He could live with Max making V less of a bitch.

Maybe it’d do him some good, too.

Now that he had sat on it for a little bit, this couch was alright.

His parents were always saying he needed more “positive influences” in his life. Whatever the fuck that meant.

They probably weren’t imagining some clichéd little hipster dyke.

They were probably imaging goddamn Barney the Dinosaur or something.

Some asshole who’d always be on his case about his drugs and his twitch.

Fuck ‘em.

This was the only family he needed.

And it had a new member.

 

* * *

 

Max hugged Victoria goodbye.

They had classes to go to.

The contact and the general niceness of the morning had her all fizzy and giddy.

Victoria wasn’t mad at her.

Victoria didn't want to just be friends, anymore.

The thought made Max giggly and nervous.

She couldn't think about it for too long.

They were reconnecting.

Slowly recovering what they had lost.

Max was still raw.

Victoria was still scared.

But they were working on it.

Taylor waved her down before she arrived at her class.

Max walked over.

Taylor had the most stupid grin on her face Max had ever seen.

Her eyes were slightly lidded.

Her arms were crossed, and she was leaning against a wall.

“You will not believe what I saw at lunch today.”

Max felt a heat coming to her cheeks.

She had a feeling.

“Uh. Won’t I?”

“Nope.”

She uncrossed her arms and pushed off of the wall to get closer to Max.

“I saw you and Victoria together. Max, I almost died from how adorable it was.”

“Taylor ---“

Taylor raised a hand.

“Na-ah! I’m not done yet.”

Max frowned. Her blush deepened.

“Awww don’t get like that. It was great. Really. That was the happiest I’ve seen Victoria in years. Please tell me you worked it out with her?”

Max shifted from side to side on her feet. She sighed.

“Work _ing_ it out with Victoria. You don’t just flip a switch and erase 3 years of bad blood.”

Taylor opened her mouth to say something but it died in her throat.

Max smiled.

“But we’re making progress.”

Taylor smiled.

“She’s talking to me again. In a real way. It’s…”

“Bullshit.”

Max flinched. That wasn’t Taylor’s voice. She knew that voice.

Chloe.

Chloe came to stand off to the side of the two of them.

She had her beanie on today.

Torn leather jacket.

Her hands were up behind the back of her head.

There was a little bit of blue dye on an errant strand of her bangs. That was new.

Max frowned. Chloe would have normally told her about her dying her hair, particularly like that.

Taylor sensed this drama wasn’t meant for her eyes.

She looked between them, put her hands up.

“Oooookay. I’m gone. Text me later, Max.”

Taylor turned on her heel and waked away.

Max tried to give Chloe her hardest look. It was hard to be that mad at Chloe, but… damn it.

“Chloe, what the hell?”

Chloe lowered her hands. They rested by her sides in fists.

“Max, what the hell?”

“I ---“

“You _nothing_. Victoria’s bad for you and you know it. I can’t let you date her. I’m putting my foot down.”

Chloe stomped one of her boots. Max wondered if Chloe knew it was a turn of phrase.

“I’m _not_ … dating her, Chloe.”

“Then what the hell is it?”

“I don’t know.”

“How can you not know?”

“What are we? What were we?”

Chloe scoffed, put her arms back up behind her head, leaned back some, and looked away.

“I don’t know. Best friends, I guess.”

She finally relented.

Max’s arms crossed her arms. The last thing she wanted to do was fight with Chloe, but this was ridiculous.

“Best friends don’t have crushes on one another.”

Chloe flinched. She frowned, still refusing to look at Max.

Max sighed and rubbed at her forehead.

“Chloe. Please. I don’t want to fight about this. I’m seeing if Victoria can be a different person after all of this time. Everyone can change. I’m not going to let her back into my life just to let her hurt me again.”

This seemed to be what Chloe wanted to hear.

She looked back to Max, but her body was still pointed away.

Her expression was thoughtful.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I’m an adult now, Chloe. I can’t just … chase … after every crush I have.”

Max was grinning stupidly.

Chloe’s face did this contorting thing before she caught on and groaned viciously.

“Oh dude you did not just …”

Max giggled.

“I did. But I have class now. Can we talk later? I don’t want this to be bothering you, Chloe.”

Chloe muttered something under her breath. Sounded like curse words.

Finally, she broke out of her spell, turned to face Max, and allowed her hands to fall back down to her sides.

“Alright. We’re talking later. Sometimes you’re too nice for your own good, Max. Victoria is trouble. It’s not _if_ she hurts you again, it’s _when_. A year from now, you’re going to totally be all ‘Oh Chloe thank you, you were so wise and correct’.”

Chloe’s imitation of Max’s voice was unflatteringly high-pitched and feeble.

Max frowned.

She figured she should probably feel good Chloe was just trying to look after her. It should be nice to have friends that were willing to go to bat for you like that.

But it felt like jealousy.

Anger.

This didn’t feel like it was coming from a healthy place.

Chloe didn’t trust that Max could make good relationship decisions.

She said it nakedly: ‘You’re too nice for your own good.’

Chloe wasn’t looking after her like a friend.

Chloe was looking after her like a dog that didn’t know when to stop biting itself.

Then again, what was Chloe to believe?

She wasn’t there when she saw the pain and the regret in Victoria’s voice.

The vulnerability in her eyes.

Chloe only had war stories to go off of and Victoria’s general terrible personality.

They’d both been in this school for a year.

They probably ran into each more than once.

Chloe already had a good idea of who Victoria was.

Chloe might have even thought she knew Victoria better than Max did.

Max probably would have been worried in her shoes, too.  

Chloe left.

She didn’t leave happy.

They didn’t hug.

It put a worried pit in Max’s stomach.

She could see the storms brewing on her personal horizon.

It was a problem for later. Now, class.

Max turned around to come face to face with Kate. Max almost screamed.

“Kate! Holy … shazbot.”

Kate frowned, but then smiled.

“Sorry, Max. You’re kind of in the way, though.”

Max blinked. She looked towards the door leading to class.

She _was_ kind of right in front of it.

She looked back to Kate.

“How much did you hear?”

“Enough to know you should listen to your friends, Max. That woman clearly cares for you. Victoria doesn’t.”

Max flinched.

Did being close to Victoria meant she was going to spend all of her time defending that decision?

She then blushed.

Kate was still kind of a stranger to her.

It probably wasn’t good for her already to know the worst of Max’s relationships.

Kate might need more convincing.

Max didn’t really have anything to say in response to that, though, and realized she was spacing hard again.

She opened the door and walked in.

Music class was a nice distraction from the tangled-up mess that was her friendships.

Since the room that it was in was purpose-built, it could look much more lively.

No depressing grays anywhere.

There was a huge grand piano in the center, and concentric circles of chairs flowing out from around it.

Along the peripheries there was all kinds of instruments, some in their cases, some not. On the far end was a stage – for drama, probably.

There were posters around the class room for various musical and drama events.

They all had this chincy gold framing around them with needlessly elaborate designs embossed into them.

She thought about picking guitar since that’s something she knew she actually liked playing, but she also wasn’t an idiot and knew basically every single guy in the class played guitar too, probably better than she did.

Except Warren.

He played drums.

Or “percussion”.

He was the “god of thunder”, in his own words.

The thought of him banging away at some over-sized drums in a horribly exaggerated way made her smile.

She picked Violin instead. Kate played that. She said it was deeply important for her spiritual balance.

That sounded like a good thing.

Max could use some of that.

Plus, it meant she could sit next to Kate.

Music class came and went.

It was another good part of her day.

She could still talk breezily with Kate, and Kate had a deep interest in music.

Like talking photography with Jefferson, she could sense that Kate could talk about it for days on end.

Warren offered fun conversation in the rest periods, too. He sat a little too close for Max’s comfort, but at least he was keeping his hands to himself this time.

Kate was talking to her. She wasn’t ignoring Max. She wasn’t trying to push her away. If she was judging, then it felt like exactly like yesterday when Kate didn’t know anything about her and Victoria.

Victoria was wrong about Kate. Kate and Chloe were wrong about Victoria.

It’d just take time, effort, and a little bit of luck for everyone to really believe it.

 

* * *

 

Friday afternoon.

Max and Victoria had spent an entire school week now reconnecting and patching things over.

It hadn’t been the easiest on either of them.

Alone, things were better.

Victoria could tell Max was slowly starting to accept she was serious about this. Victoria knew exactly what she wanted out of Max, now. 

In public, things were more difficult.

While Victoria’s group of friends largely enjoyed Max’s company, and particularly the effect Max had on Victoria, the opposite was true wise-round.

Out of Max’s entire group of friends, Rachel was the only one who would talk to Victoria, and it wasn’t like Victoria hadn’t tried to fuck that up earlier, either.

Victoria knew this arrangement wasn’t stable. Something had to give. Later.

Victoria stared at her phone and tried to burn holes through it with her eyes.

Of course it didn’t relent.

It was just a dumb piece of plastic.

It had no idea about the larger concerns of complicated interpersonal drama.

In fact, it had no thoughts at all.

She had typed up a nice message to Max asking if she wanted to chill tonight.

She only rewrote it about a hundred times and agonized sending it for an hour.

This was an improvement.

She’d spent far longer agonizing over far more important texts trying to unfuck their relationship.

But after a week turned into a month into a few months into a year into three, that text was never sent.

Every day she hesitated she felt like it had to be that much more perfect to make up for the increased time.

Victoria didn’t even really know what they’d do together.

They only had one class in common – that she had to make damn sure of in the first place – and Max was probably busy making new friends or starting to get into the groove of studying. She probably didn’t want to see her right now.

Victoria had other things to do, too. Nate had a party ready to go. He always wanted to party on Friday nights. That’s really where Victoria belonged.

_With a bunch of people too high to know better than to be around you._

She sent it anyway.

Fuck her anxieties.

She started to experience _new_ anxieties she hadn’t before, though. A reply didn’t come instantly.

She groaned. She let her phone fall down on the bed and covered her eyes with her arm, just relaxing.

_She’s out enjoying herself without you. She only enjoys herself without you. Her other friends are much better for her than you are._

When she got a response back a few minutes later, she swore her arm never moved that fast before in her life to grab her phone and unlock it.

She then deflated a bit. Max was sad. She didn’t want to make Victoria sad too with her sad sadness.

Fuck. That. Noise.

If Victoria was going to be Max’s friend again, she had to be there for her.

_I’m coming. I’ll either make you happy or we’ll be sad together. Win either way._

This time, a reply came instantly.

_Ok. :)_

Victoria made her way to Max’s room.

She hesitated again on knocking.

_You’ll just make it worse. When have you ever helped Max? You just use her and throw her away._

The terrible part of her was so much easier to ignore when Max was around.

But she was _right there_ , so she was able to force herself into knocking at the door.

“It’s open.”

Victoria opened Max’s door, walked inside, and closed it behind her.

She locked it without really meaning to.

Her heart sank when she turned around. Max was sitting on the couch, slumped over.

Both of her hands were supporting her head. Her phone and earbuds were on the floor.

She looked devastated.

_You did this to her. Your fault. Your fault. Your fault._

Victoria’s breath waivered and she walked over to Max’s couch.

She sat down next to her.

Max didn’t move.

Victoria raised a hand up.

She wanted so badly to touch Max’s shoulder.

To rub it.

To hug her.

To comfort her.

_To fuck her. You want to touch her to fuck her._

But she couldn’t close the distance.

Turns out, she didn’t need to, anyway.

Max slouched in her direction.

Whether or not Victoria wanted to, her arms had to come around to support her, or Max was just going to flounder like some kind of hilarious fish.

“Hi.”

_Smooth move, Ex-lax._

“Hi.”

Max sounded drained.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Max groaned.

“Not really. It’s dumb and stupid.”

_She doesn’t trust you to help her._

Victoria closed her eyes.

She breathed in deeply.

She searched within herself for her best resolve to ignore the stupid part of her fucked brain for at least a few minutes.

Max deserved better than her.

Victoria did actually know what to say here. Max taught her.

“Max. I can’t help you if you don’t let me.”

“I …”

Max clearly wasn’t expecting that.

She sounded breathless.

Victoria shifted their position.

She scooted down the couch and slowly lowered Max onto her back, with her head pointing skywards on Victoria’s lap.

Her hands came to run through Max’s hair. Despite their time apart, the intimacy felt natural. Max didn’t resist a second of the way down.

If Victoria tried, she could imagine them back in Seattle.

This was their favorite position.

Back before everything got hard.

Max melted and sighed wearily.

But she smiled in the faintest of ways after a few seconds.

Victoria was helping.

Max clasped her hands together over her belly.

“Chloe’s upset at me. Because of me. She won’t listen to me. She thinks you’re only going to hurt me again. We had plans tonight. They c-canceled on me.”

_Your fault your fault your fault your fault --_

“That sucks.”

“Yeah …”

Victoria struggled to find the words in the correct combination that would work to make Max happy.

Maybe they didn’t exist.

Well. Something came to mind, anyway.

But it was impossible.

It required her to swallow her pride.

A Chase always carries herself with pride.

Fuck it.

Max deserved better.

“I’ll talk to her.”

_Max won’t let you. She doesn’t trust you alone with Chloe._

“Wh --- “

Victoria knew Max was going to protest. She quickly shuffled a hand over to put a finger on her lips to shush her. Max’s eyes were wide open, looking straight up at her.

Pleading.

Wavering.

_Your fault._

“Max. Please. She’s upset because of me. Not you. You didn’t do anything. I did everything. You’ll just sound like you’re blind to my … downsides … if you try and convince her. She needs to see it from me. Hear it from me. She won’t believe it otherwise.”

Max sighed and closed her eyes.

Victoria moved both of her hands back to raking through Max’s hair.

She knew how relaxing it was to Max to pet at her hair.

_You’ll make Chloe even more mad. You’ve never been anything but a bitch to her. She won’t believe you._

“I-I don’t know, Victoria. I don’t know if I can take it if you make her even more upset. T-this is already pretty rough on me …”

Max sounded so raw.

Victoria bit her lip.

_Chloe won’t believe you. You’ll just prove her right. Max will have to choose. She won’t choose you._

Victoria moved one of her hands over to grasp for one of Max’s.

Their fingers interlocked easily.

“Please trust me, Max. I won’t.”

Max spent a few minutes just relaxing under Victoria’s touch, in her lap. Breathing deep.

_Considering if she’s going to throw her life away for you._

She squeezed Victoria’s hand.

“Okay. I trust you.”

It came out so slowly. So painfully. Max was risking a lot in trusting Victoria like this.

Max deserved better than her.

She didn’t deserve to have her entire social circle fall apart because for some unfathomable reason she still trusted Victoria.

Victoria could fix this.

She had to fix this.

But for now, she had to fix Max.

Victoria had an idea on just how to do that.

“Do you want to watch some terrible horror movies, Max?”

Her lips curled up in a smile.

“Do I get to rest in your lap some more?”

“If you want to.”

She did.

“Deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're already read this chapter, I've edited it in a few places to fit more coherently with the previous story in the series. All of the plot points are the same, but I've changed some dialogue around here and there to fit better, and added in some more of Victoria's inner demons during the lunch scene.


	3. Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max keeps Victoria from floating away.
> 
> Victoria deals with her nemesis.
> 
> Chloe is speechless.
> 
> Rachel struggles to understand.
> 
> * * *
> 
> End of Act I.

Victoria had another nightmare.

She was starting to think she had premonitions or something. Maybe this was the last vestiges of her conscious throwing everything it had at her to make sure she didn’t fuck this up. Max deserved better than her.

This time, she didn’t wake up by jolting upwards. There was another body entangled to hers, keeping her safely tethered to the ground. Keep her from fucking floating away or something.

She didn’t need a cigarette.

Max.

She could feel Max’s arms around her, with her hands loosely clasped about the middle of her back. Max had tucked her face into Victoria’s neck. Victoria had a few inches of height on Max, enough so that she could naturally rest her chin on Max’s scruffy hair. They fit together like a lego brick.

Taylor would have called it cute. Good thing Taylor wasn’t around.

She didn’t need a cigarette.

Victoria’s heart was jittery. She had a cold sweat. Her skin felt itchy all over, like it was a few sizes too small for her body.

She tightened her grasp on the other body in the bed.

Max made a dreamy murmuring sound.

She could feel Max’s breath cascading down her neck and shoulder blades.

Calm. Slow. Relaxed.

She didn’t need a cigarette. Anymore.

The nightmare was already starting to fade. She knew it was about Chloe. She knew it was bullshit. She couldn’t fuck this up. She wouldn’t fuck this up.

She fell asleep again.

When Victoria stirred next, Max wasn’t there. Victoria started to panic.

It was pretty early in the morning. The sun was just starting to peak through her window. Despite the nightmare and all, she felt pretty well rested.

Max’s phone was on Victoria’s night stand.

_Calm down, Idiot. She has to be nearby, still._

Her bad side was surprisingly helpful this morning. She managed to calm herself down with a deep, weary sigh.

Victoria found her own phone. Saturday.

She knew what she had to do today. She swallowed hard.

Victoria got up and out of bed, and got dressed. She saw Max’s discarded clothes on the ground. Her closest had a night gown unaccounted for.

They didn’t …?

No. She would have remembered that. She hoped. It was probably just more comfortable to watch movies that way. They probably would have slept naked if they did _that_. Victoria still had her underwear on when she woke up. She didn’t see any of Max’s on the ground.

Good. Victoria probably wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she had exploited Max’s emotional vulnerability for sex. Victoria was thirsty as fuck but she considered herself to have _some_ class. Max would never trust her again if she did that.

But that’s not what happened.

Her conscience was clear.

She wasn’t the worst friend in the world.

Victoria started the elaborate, painstaking process of putting on her makeup and styling her hair.

About half way through, Max came back into the room. She took special care in not making any noise from her foot steps and to close the door as gently as possible.

She gasped when she turned around and saw Victoria up.

“Victoria. Good morning.”

Victoria smiled, and put down her comb and hair product. Max had seen her without any make up on at all, several times. Right after showers, even. She wasn’t going to be scandalized by a half-finished hair job.

She turned around.

“Good morning, Max. Did you sleep well?”

Max had an adorably warm smile on her face. Her eyes were lidded half way. If Victoria didn’t know any better, she’d say Max got into some of her – Nathan’s -- weed.

Max had on that missing night gown – it was too long on her, but that really only made it function better as a night gown, anyway. Her hair was messy. It was a silly combo with the dainty, silvery fabric, and elaborate floral trimmings.

But it was cute and endearing and Victoria would die a happy woman if she woke up to this more often.  She should have a picture of it, sometime.

“Yeah. I did. Thanks, Tori. For … everything.”

Victoria’s breath hitched twice. Once, because of the pet name – the one pet name she allowed Max to use all of those years ago – twice, because Max was peeling off that night gown and had absolutely no shame in doing so.

She really didn’t have any reason to, Victoria’s brain reminded her. Being naked felt less exposed to Victoria than not fully having her face and hair done. Max was easily in the group of people who could see either exposure without difficulty. Max probably felt the same way.

Even the terrible part of Victoria didn’t have any smart-ass remarks ready to go. Maybe it hadn’t woken up yet.

Still, she could see Max’s cheeks flush.

Victoria started breathing again when Max started to talk next. Her skinny jeans were about half way on. She had the most adorable look of concentration when she was trying to get them on.

At least she had underwear on.

“Nate, um, Nathan, came into your room a little while ago. He woke me up --- not intentionally, at least I don’t think, anyway. I thought it would be a good chance to talk to him, to know him a little bit better. I feel like all of your friends know me so well, but I hardly know any of them…”

“Yeah. I met all of them after we stopped talking, but they _had_ to know about you.”

“He’s uh, … nice.”

“Does he creep you out?”

Max froze. She gave Victoria a helpless look.

“A-at first. His eyes do this … thing. I feel like they’re stripping me down or something. I don’t know if he realizes he’s doing it --- b-but then you told him who I was, and he …”

She looked for a word on Victoria’s ceiling. She finished putting her jeans on.

“He changed. I don’t fully understand what he says sometimes. It’s like he’s having five conversations and I’m only part of one. He switches between them so effortlessly. I can’t keep up.”

Victoria nodded.

He was easiest to talk to in short bursts. He could seem almost … normal, that way. In extended conversations, particularly with just one person, he could seem borderline incoherent and ranting. She wondered if that’s just how he thought. Maybe that was the thing that gave him insight to skip all of his classes but still pass them easily.

Max had found probably the most charitable way to describe this. Victoria’s friends just called him crazy, at least when they thought Victoria wasn’t paying attention. Otherwise he was “unique”. Fucking sycophants.

Maybe that’s because her friends were assholes who only tolerated Nate because she forced them to.

Victoria turned around to continue doing her hair.

“He thinks differently than I do.”

Victoria admitted, slowly. She made a deal with herself a long time ago that she would never describe him in a way he would to object to, even if he wasn’t around. She did this with Max, too. Taylor teased her about it sometimes. Courtney would just give her a knowing smile.

“But he’s one of the only people who really care and look out for me. I met him my first year here. If you think my parents are assholes, wait until you see his. They treat him like a fucking robot that just needs the right parts shoved into him until he produces the effect they want.”

Victoria could see Max flinch in her mirror. They both continued anyway.

“Mine are just a mix of three-quarters ambitious and one-quarter asshole. They don’t fully understand what they’re doing when they want me to be so perfect.”

Victoria paused. She didn’t tell Max something about the kiss story.

“After I exploded on you, my parents were happy. _At first_. But then I was miserable, and they noticed it -- changed their tune. They wanted you back, and they knew it was better for me.”

“It took about a year, but… they cared, eventually. I-I think the damage was already done, but they tried. I think they thought life would be easier for me if I wasn’t … like t-that.”

Victoria swallowed and steadied her voice.

“Nate’s just don’t care. Not until he embarrasses the family, anyway, then they just shop him around to another psychiatrist who will do what they want – assign another batch of fucking awful drugs to fix his brain. Nate turns into a fucking zombie for a week. He finds a way to get off of the drugs. The cycle repeats. No one’s learning the score.”

Max finished putting on her clothes. She sat patiently on the edge of Victoria’s bed, absorbing the information.

Victoria was just like her, Max suddenly realized. Victoria couldn’t stand to see Nathan suffering like that and connected with him. She did what she could to keep him alive and productive. She was trying to make the world a better place, in her own, sometimes misguided ways. It felt a little easier to believe she could genuinely convince Chloe.

Victoria saw Max spacing again, so she decided to be quiet and let her do her thing while Victoria finished her hair.

Eventually, she finished and put her instruments away. Max spoke up.

“Were you serious about talking to Chloe, last night?”

Victoria answered without hesitation.

“Yes.”

Victoria turned around to face Max again. Max protested.

“But she doesn’t even want to talk to you. You’re … Icky Vicky, the Evil Witch of Cascadia.”

Victoria raised her eyebrow. She’d been called a lot of things, but “witch” wasn’t one of them. Icky Vicky wasn’t new, though. That _fucking_ cartoon ---

“I’ll get to her to talk to me.”

“How?”

“I’ll make her an offer she can’t refuse.”

Max didn’t know what that meant. Victoria delivered it with such finality. She had a sly, confident grin on her face. She had a plan. She was thinking about this. She was going to honestly try and make a difference. To do the right thing.

“A-alright.”

“Max.”

“Yeah?”

“It means a lot to me that you trust me with this.”

Max went silent. Her hands were shaking. Her next breath came out too hard and shaky.

It made Max really nervous to think of what this would make them if Victoria pulled it off.

“Y-yeah.”

Victoria crossed her arms and leaned back.

_She doesn’t trust you. She’s just too scared to say “no” to you._

“I should get back to my room, now. I-I do actually have things to study and homework to do.”

Max’s swerve game could use some work. That was a terrible excuse to use on a weekend. No one did fucking homework on a Saturday fucking morning. The sun wasn’t even fully out yet. There were roosters less diligent.

Victoria was okay with it – most of her, anyway – she just needed to Max to know. Victoria knew she needed to earn her actually accepting it.

Victoria decided to play ball with Max’s unconvincing dodge.

She groaned.

“We need to teach you how to live. You need everything cleared by Friday night so your weekend is just coasting.”

Max considered the words.

“I’ll try next week to do that, then. But today …”

Victoria peeled an arm away to gesture vaguely in front of her. She put on her best teacher voice. For some reason, her teacher voice sounded British.

“Today you may leave, Miss Caulfield. I expect a report on the movies we watched no later than Sunday night.”

Max giggled.

They hugged, and lingered on that hug.

Then Max left.

Victoria sighed.

Victoria really needed to do this on her own, anyway. If Max was right by her side, it’d be much easier to do it, but it would also taint the impact. Chloe would just think she was doing it because Max was twisting her arm. It wouldn’t seem genuine.

Victoria left her room and started stalking the hall ways.

On the other hand, she knew Max was right. Victoria had actually accosted Chloe after Taylor told her about the incident on Wednesday. Chloe didn’t listen to a word she said. Just kept right on walking. Like Victoria wasn’t even there. Like she didn’t exist. Without Max by her side, Victoria was much easier to just cast aside and ignore. At least for Chloe.

_She knows you’re just going to manipulate her._

Victoria had a lot of capital. Political capital, people capital, cash money capital. Chloe was above, or below, all of that. All of the circles she moved in didn’t care about any of that. Skaters, punks, anarchists, drifters, losers, drop outs, burn outs. All of them would be either immune or find it hilarious that Victoria was trying to butter them up.

Well, almost all of them.

This wasn’t going to be easy. At least, not as easy as getting some other people to see things her way.

And Victoria, to fix the shit she brought on Max’s life, needed to patch things up with her arch-nemesis.

Perfect McPerfectface.

_She’ll see right through you, like she always does._

She had to try. Max deserved better than this.

 

* * *

 

Chloe couldn’t find Rachel and it blew. And sucked. But mostly blew.

Nah, it was alright. Rachel did that sometimes.

Rachel had this weird tendency of being everywhere and nowhere at once. It was kinda freaky. She’d show up right when Chloe was getting a little too anxious about her being missing and then --- _fwoop ---_ she’d be gone not a second after Chloe was good again.

She’d even just appear sometimes when Chloe was about to do something stupid. She had a really good knack for Chloe’s inability to handle some things, mostly relationship issues.

She was like a super hero. How the hell did Chloe end up with her?

Like with Max. On Tuesday, Chloe couldn’t find Max _or_ Rachel and she was _this_ close to losing it because _no_ one was answering their fucking phones when Rachel’s hand found her in the middle of the goddamn field outside of the dorms.

Chloe still couldn’t figure out how the hell she snuck up on her like that. Chloe was a little distracted sometimes but she’d be able to see someone coming in the middle of a goddamn field. Her weed wasn’t that strong. She was sober when she was around Max, anyway.

She said Max was sleeping in her room, passed out. Chloe didn’t question it at the time, but her insight was hella weird to think about. It made Chloe’s brain hurt. She was right, of course. Max was exactly where she said she would be. She even knew the door would be open, even though Max usually locked it.

At the time, she said she just went to get tacos. Rachel always invited her when food was involved. Chloe knew it was bullshit. But Rachel had tacos. Not like she could just materialize them out of thin air. It had to have been where she was. Chloe was being paranoid. Rachel wouldn’t lie to her.

Justin and Trevor were tearing up the skate park. They weren’t supposed to be here. It was abandoned years ago. Just about every square inch of the pipes and pools had been tagged. The anarchists like to hang out around here sometimes. Who cares. Not Chloe.

Especially not a Chloe that just finished making out with Mary Jane. It was much easier to deal with Rachel’s weirdness like this. She was way better at skating when high, anyway. Justin and Trevor said so.

Then again, they probably just really wanted more people to be high with them.

They were cool. They just wanted to skate, smoke pot, and eat food. It was a really relaxing life style.

Rachel could learn from them. Just stay in one place for a while. Slow down. Not be everything to everyone for once.

The weed also made it easier to believe Chloe was doing the right thing. Max would come around eventually. She was just blinded by hormones or something. Victoria was probably a really good lay. The really stuck-up ones were always the best. Kate was probably a huge freak. Whips and everything.

Chloe picked up her skateboard. She got a running start. She really need a distraction right now and Rachel wasn’t it.

“Awww killer! The big C is on the whirlpool!”

 

* * *

 

Victoria could never find Rachel when she most wanted to. Rachel only appeared in class or rarely when Victoria was tearing into one of Rachel’s friends. She always knew _exactly_ what to say to unbalance Victoria or to get her to reconsider what she was doing.

Word for word. Action for action. Breath for breath.

She was goddamn perfect and Victoria was jealous as fuck.

But she needed to find her, or Victoria would have to do something stupid and irresponsible, like hijack the school’s intercom. She could get away with it too, in fact –

Fucking Rachel fucking Amber’s hand grasped at her shoulder. Victoria almost wasn’t surprised at this point.

She carefully turned around. Victoria kept her face flat because out of all of the people who deserved to see more emotion out of her, Rachel wasn’t one of them.

“I hear you’re looking for me.”

_Bullshit._

Victoria didn’t tell a soul about this. Even Max didn’t know. If Chloe knew Victoria was trying to butter up Rachel, it wouldn’t work. Rachel wasn’t telling her something.

Her fucking perfect grin and her perfect hair and her perfect eyes were just taunting her. Perfectly.

Still, she needed Rachel’s (perfect) cooperation here.

 _Swallow your pride, asshole. This is about Max, not your insecurities_. _Don’t fuck this up._

“Rachel. Hi. Yes. Yes I am. I am indeed looking for you. That is what I am doing.”

Every word was so painful and so slow coming out of Victoria’s mouth. Rachel was hanging on every word. She was loving this, of course.

Finally, Victoria sighed, and steeled herself. Rip off the band aid. Get it over with.

“I need to talk to Chloe. It’s about Max.”

Rachel’s grin never went anywhere. It was unsettling. Is that what Victoria looked like? Some kind of doll? She couldn’t even tell if Rachel was paying attention. She should play poker sometime. With Rachel’s luck, she could be a millionaire overnight.

“Mmmm, that’s a tough sell, babe. What’cha got?”

Victoria sighed wearily. At least Rachel was predictable. She was perfect, except in one way.

She was a fucking addict. Even worse than Nathan.

She wondered why she hooked up with Chloe of all things – Chloe was just a weed burnout. Every so often she’d borrow some more from Nate to sell to all of the idiot skaters down at that stupid skate park, but Chloe was a small fry in the drug world.

Rachel was far worse. Nate said she took drugs like a goddamn horse. It didn’t matter what it was. Hayden – her circle’s resident burnout --- was in a perpetual state of awe around her for it. His hero.

She’d eventually have to end up with someone like Nate – or god forbid, Frank – Nate’s dealer, super creepy guy – just to sustain her habit. There’s no way a college student could afford all of this.

But at least this was an angle Victoria could work with. If Rachel wanted drugs, Nathan had those, and Nathan would do whatever Victoria asked of him. Particularly if he knew it would help Max in some way.

“Ask Nate for whatever you want. Tell him ‘Victory comes in the morning’. He’ll probably not trust you at first since --- yeah --- but he’ll let you have you want. He might even do it happily if you do it this Friday. He loves it when you trash his parties.”

“Killer. You sure do know a way into a girl’s heart, Victoria. I can see why Max likes you so much.”

Victoria grit her teeth. _She doesn’t like me because I hook her up with drugs, asshole._

“I’ll ease up Chloe. I know what she wants to hear. You’ll ‘accidentally’ meet her while I’m around. She won’t want to look like a bitch in front of me, particularly when she’s trying to take the moral high ground. You’ll get your talk.”

Victoria had to admit this was a plan that could work. Chloe looked at Rachel like a little puppy that had been kicked too much and found someone who finally pet it instead. She wouldn’t want to seem like she was being unreasonable about this right in front of Rachel, while Victoria was trying to fix it. She’d at least stop and fucking talk to her.

Was Rachel thinking about this too? Was she just waiting for the right moment to approach Victoria about it? There’s no way she just came up with that on the spot. Rachel wasn’t telling her something again. It pissed her off. Victoria spent hours this morning thinking up of what to say and what to do. Rachel just materialized it out of thin air.

Rachel then crossed her arms. For a second, that grin went away, replaced with something sober. She moved another strand of hair away from her face.

“Just … don’t fuck it up, please? Chloe’s really on a tear about this. It’s kinda hard to talk to her now. Max is suffering. She doesn’t need that in her life. If you’re not serious … if you don’t really care for her, just fuck off, please.”

Victoria sighed. At least Rachel cared about Max. Maybe it’s a good thing to have someone so undeniably perfect watching out for her. Like some kind of goddamn guardian angel.

“Not this time, Rachel. Max is more important than my bullshit.”

Rachel’s smile came back. It felt more natural this time. Victoria was probably just seeing things.

“I’m glad to hear it. That’s what Max needs. Gotta go. I’ll text you when I’ve got Chloe ready. Tomorrow at the latest. Don’t try to talk to her before then.”

Victoria crossed her arms, closed her eyes, counted to five, and then opened them again. She looked around.

Rachel was gone.

How the fuck did she do that? It was like playing hide and seek with someone who could turn invisible.

Victoria never gave Rachel her number. It didn’t matter. She knew Rachel would have it when she needed it, anyway.

 

* * *

 

Chloe found Rachel back in their room. In hindsight, it was a pretty obvious place to look.

In Chloe’s defense, Rachel was only ever in their room later in the night. Usually she had some kind of thing to do or person to see. It wasn’t all that late yet.

“Chloe.”

Rachel smiled. Chloe sighed contently.

“Rachel.”

They hugged. Chloe tightened it. Rachel giggled.

“If you squeeze the air out of me then there won’t be any girlfriend left for you later.”

Chloe growled.

“I’ll squeeze more out of you than just air.”

The hug turned into a giggly wrestling fight. Fighting for dominance, for power. Eventually they ended up in the bed, with Chloe’s arms pinned above her head, and Rachel straddling her.

“No fair. You cheated.”

“I’m taller and I work out more than you. What exactly makes you think you’ll ever win these?”

“Maybe it’s just really hot to be wrestled to the bed.”

They both shared a laugh. Rachel softened her pinning to just rub at Chloe’s wrists. She leaned down to kiss at her.

Chloe reciprocated. But her heart wasn’t into it right now. She squirmed until Rachel broke away, giving her a cryptic look.

“What’s wrong, babe?”

“Where were you all day? I missed you.”

“Kicking Max’s ass. She’s been a depressed sack of shit all day.”

 _Fuck_.

Chloe was sober right now. The guilt was impossible to ignore and it rested uneasily as a nervous ball in her stomach. That was like the one answer Rachel could have given that wouldn’t have made Chloe more upset at her.

“What about?”

“What do you think, smart ass?”

Rachel didn’t look happy about it. Chloe frowned.

Rachel sighed and rolled off of Chloe to lay down beside her on the bed.

She was definitely pouting.

This was Chloe’s fault.

“You think I’m doing the right thing, don’t you? Victoria’s a bitch. She doesn’t really like Max. Victoria is just manipulating her with sex.”

“ _Chloe_. Max is a _virgin_. You told me yourself – they had a fight when Max did so much as try and kiss her. You think Max has had the balls to get all of the way to sex in a week? With you making her depressed as all hell for half of that? Victoria’s not even that horny even at parties when there’s people doing all kinds of stuff around her. Not everyone has your libido.”

God damn it Rachel.

But she was right. She was always right. Chloe was the asshole.

“What if Victoria does it again? I could have… we could have… prevented it.”

Chloe felt lamer and lamer by the second. It sounded a lot better in her head.

“I don’t know, what if Max’s best friend just decides to have a hissy fit over her new girlfriend and decides to ignore her? And gets her all super mega sad? Maybe Max shouldn’t have stayed friends with that best friend. It could have been prevented.”

 _Ughhhh_.

Chloe’s hands came up to shield her eyes. She then slowly raked them down her face. She applied a lot of pressure and made sure her nails made at least a little bit of contact.

“Alright. Fine. You win. I feel like the worst friend ever, now, thanks. What do you want me to do about it?”

“We’ll find Victoria and talk to her tomorrow. You’ll talk to her, I mean. You haven’t done that yet, right?”

“No…”

“Even though she’s the reason you’re upset.”

Chloe groaned.

“Yes, yes, I’m a fantastic asshole, I get it. No. I haven’t talked to Victoria yet. I figured she was just going to manipulate me or something.”

Rachel frowned.

“Do you have like no trust in Max’s ability to pick her friends?”

God damn it Rachel.

The fight just about left Chloe entirely. She sniffled.

She looked away from Rachel, towards the ceiling. It was the same stupid pattern that was on every ceiling, but it was still interesting enough for now.

“I just… I just wanted to protect Max. You don’t know how _hurt_ she sounded after Victoria did that, Rachel. It was the worst thing I ever heard in my life. It tore my heart to shreds for like, a week. And she had the worst anxieties about any relationships she had for months afterwards. Always second-guessing whatever she did, whatever anyone said to her.”

Chloe gulped.

“I’m not good at … helping her like that. With emotions and stuff. It was lame to the extreme. Afterwards I promised I wouldn’t let that happen to her again. I can’t … fix her but I can sure as hell scare off any weak-sauce-bitch-ass who tries that.”

Rachel sighed, but smiled. She inched closer, interlocked one of her hands with Chloe’s, and laid her head on Chloe’s shoulder.

Chloe melted and squeezed the interlocked hand vigorously.

“I understand, Chloe. Your heart was in the right place. Max is a really nice person. You’re really close to her. You don’t want to see your friend suffering needlessly.”

“Yeah …”

Chloe’s voice was breathless and dreamy.

“But Max isn’t a kid anymore. She’s a woman living in the adult world. We all get to make decisions. Sometimes we make the wrong ones. But that’s how we learn and grow. You can’t baby-proof Max’s life for her, or she won’t really grow and mature.”

“Plus, have you even seen them together?”

Chloe frowned.

“No …”

Rachel giggled.

“Oh my god Chloe. It’s the cutest thing. Max has this distant, giggly look on her face all of the time. It’s like she has permanent bedroom eyes. And Victoria …”

Rachel shifted.

“I don’t think Victoria has had very many healthy relationships before. I can’t imagine a better person than Max for her. I’ve never seen her so happy before.”

Chloe groaned again. She closed her eyes.

“I’m the asshole, aren’t I?”

“Yeah, you are. But you’re my asshole. ---”

“Gross.”

“--- And you’re doing the right thing tomorrow, right?”

“Yes, mom.”

“Good girl. I’ve got you so whipped.”

“Ugh. Rachel …!”

Rachel bit down on Chloe’s shoulder.

Chloe moaned eagerly.

“Oooh. Rachel …”

 

* * *

 

Sunday.

This was the longest Rachel said it would take.

Victoria was pacing nervously in her room.

This had to go right.

_Rachel is playing you for an idiot. She and Chloe are just going to humiliate you as soon as you turn up._

Nathan took a sip from a soda can. He belched freely.

Victoria groaned and rolled her eyes.

But she didn’t offer him any spines or spiteful remarks.

He smiled.

“I think if you walk in that line anymore you’ll burn a hole in the rug, Vic. Sit down.”

Victoria sighed wearily.

She paused for a few moments, turned to look at him, and took a seat on her bed.

She put her face in her hands.

“What am I going to _do_ , Nate?”

Her voice was severely muffled by her hands on account of them being right over her mouth, rubbing at her nose and cheekbones.

“Talk to Chloe.”

“Not ---“

Nathan didn’t let her finish.

“You’ll talk. To Chloe. Then this will be done with, and you’ll feel like an idiot afterwards for worrying about it so much.”

Victoria looked up to peer at him.

He was still smiling. Sitting wide on the couch as he often did. He was leaned forward with that can of soda in one of his hands.

“Look, I know you hate the shit out of Rachel, but she doesn’t want this to go over poorly. It can’t be doing her much good to have a fucked-up Max just moping all day. And Chloe’s her girlfriend, right? You think she wants to have a pissed-off girlfriend all day long?”

He took a sip.

“I wouldn’t. So. She’s going to do exactly what she said. She wants both of her friends happy. You want your girlfriend happy. This all works out for everyone.”

“She’s _not_ my ---“

She still couldn’t get a word in edge wise.

“Right, she’s just someone who sleeps half-naked with you every other night. My bad. I totally do that all of the time with my not-girlfriends.”

Victoria could feel the tremendous heat on her cheeks. She hated it when Nathan was right.

But she also liked it.

He _was_ right about all of this. She was probably worrying over nothing. Her stupid bad side was just getting the better of her again.

She straightened her back. Her arms came down to her sides to rest her hands lazily on the bed.

She smiled.

“Thanks, Nate. I needed that.”

“Anytime, V.”

She hesitated.

“Is it really that obvious?”

He sighed, rolled his eyes, and put his soda can down.

“Do you want the honest answer or the easy one?”

“I --- “

Her phone interrupted her. Text from some random number. She thought about ignoring it, but then remembered that it was probably Rachel.

She picked up her phone.

_Meet me outside the dorms in 5 mins to talk with Chloe xoxoxo_

Well. That about settled it.

Victoria stood up.

“We’ll… have this conversation later. Rachel just texted me. It’s party time.”

“Go get ‘em, tiger.”

Victoria made her way outside of the dorms.

She walked slowly so she wouldn’t have to wait very long. Victoria didn’t like waiting. Especially when she was nervous.

She carefully sat down on the stairs leading up to the dorm’s entrance.

She didn’t have to wait very long.

Walking from one of the nearby buildings towards the dorm was Rachel and Chloe, hand-in-hand. Chloe was busy talking to Rachel about something.

They were laughing and giggling.

For the moment, Chloe and Rachel looked so happy and care-free.

But Chloe eventually looked forward and saw Victoria.

She frowned and stopped in her tracks.

Victoria’s breath hitched. That stupid nervous part of her belly kicked up again.

_You’ll fail. She won’t believe you._

But Rachel leaned over and whispered something into Chloe’s ear. She grimaced, then visibly sighed.

She started walking towards Victoria again.

Rachel was keeping up with her end of the deal.

This was going to go alright.

Victoria stood up. She kept her arms crossed since the posture made her feel more confident.

They made their way over. Rachel stopped a few feet short, unhooked their hands, and pushed Chloe towards Victoria in a rather unceremonious fashion.

It was awkward.

Chloe looked anywhere but towards Victoria. She rubbed at the back of her neck.

Rachel was giving Victoria an expectant look. More like a glare, really. Details.

Victoria sighed. Peel off the band aid. Max deserved better than her best friends being literally unable to talk to each other.

She uncrossed her arms and walked down the steps until she was close to Chloe.

“Chloe.”

Chloe hooked her hands behind her head, pointed her elbows forward, and looked at Victoria. One of her boots kicked at the ground idly.

“Victoria.”

“I’m sorry.”

It was just two words, but it changed an awful lot about Chloe’s posture almost immediately.

Rachel smiled.

Chloe lowered her hands down to her sides. Her foot stilled. Her mouth was agape but she still hadn’t fully realized that yet so she didn’t have time to correct it.

She shook her head.

“What?”

Victoria bit her lip.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so mean to you.”

Chloe wore her shock openly. It was really the last thing she expected Victoria to open with, and her doubling down on it was even more unusual.

Maybe Rachel was right after all. Maybe Max was good for Victoria.

“Yeah okay. I forgive you.”

Chloe’s posture slouched.

“I don’t want to be mad at Max. I don’t want to fight with someone who might be close to her. Truce?”

“Truce.”

Chloe smiled. It was uneven, and a little dangerous, but it was still a smile.

“I want something out of you, Price.”

Chloe’s smile faltered.

“Uh. What?”

“I have a deal for you. I know you’re quite nervous about me hurting Max again. I want to …”

Victoria closed her eyes.

She thought back to all of the times she had been with Max recently.

Even in just these few short days, she knew exactly what she needed to do.

She steeled herself. It was now or never.

“I want to dispel the notion that that will occur _so thoroughly_ that you will not just be comfortable with me dating Max, you will give me your blessing to do.”

Chloe put her hands on the sides of her waist.

“Yeah? And just how ya’ gonna do that, Chase?”

She was grinning toothily though. She liked where this was going.

“I will offer you a contract. You give me your blessing to date Max. In return, if I break her heart, I’ll let you personally shave my head. Out here. In public. And then dress me for a week. So long as it’s actual clothes and not just making me naked, anyway.”

Chloe had never fully recovered from the apology from earlier but Victoria’s proposition had just about knocked her over. Her mouth was wide open. She was totally speechless.

Chloe knew that Victoria cared extremely deeply about her appearance. She simply couldn’t compute the Victoria she knew making a deal that would intentionally burn all of that just for Max.

Just for Max.

Max clearly meant something to her.

Shit.

Chloe was wrong about Victoria.

And here Victoria was, doing everything 110% like she always did, just to make sure that Chloe’s dumb ass really got the message and wasn’t going to be spiteful about the whole thing.

Sensing her girlfriend was actually broken, Rachel came over and none-too-subtly shoved her in the ribs. Chloe yelped, shook her head, and continued.

“Do I uh, want to know how I can trust you on that?”

Victoria rolled her eyes.

“Because I will have something drafted and overnighted to you. We will sign it and that will be it.”

Victoria smiled.

Chloe took some time to process the logistics of this. Victoria had like a lawyer all ready to go for this shit and everything. Just for Max. Just for her.

It was impressive.

She couldn’t help but smile and laugh at that. Just the idea of some stuffy-ass Chase lawyer getting this request and serving papers to a punk like Chloe.

It was a great mental image. She’d have to keep it for a while and bring it out on rainy days.

“Damn … you’re hardcore, Victoria. Shame we had to be enemies for so long.”

She looked to Rachel.

Rachel was still smiling wide.

“Are you seriously going to pass up a potential chance to shave Victoria?”

“Uh, _no_.”

She looked back to Victoria.

“Alright. You’ve convinced me. I’m still nervous about it, but she clearly means more to you than I thought. We don’t need a uh … contract. We can just shake on it. Like normal people do.”

“And what would I know about what normal people do?”

Chloe went speechless again. Rachel giggled.

Victoria could get used to shocking Chloe like this.

“That was a joke, Price.”

“Dude I fuckin’ --- _ugh_.”

Chloe crossed her arms and looked away.

She couldn’t meet Victoria’s stupid grinning face in the eyes. She was blushing madly. Being out-joked by Victoria Chase. This day really just couldn’t get any weirder.

Rachel squeezed at Chloe’s sides and she yelped again.

“Can you --- not! Thanks.”

“Stop staaaaaaaalling already!”

Rachel was an actual five-year-old right now with how giddy this was making her.

Chloe looked back to Victoria. She exhaled deeply and tried to calm herself. Her arms came down to her sides.

She extended her hand.

Victoria extended hers.

They shook on it.

It took a few seconds longer than it should have, since they did a dumb competitive game to see who had the firmer grip, but they shook on it.

They both smiled.                    

Rachel piped in after a quiet moment of appreciation.

“Can we tell Max about this Monday morning? I hear she’s really tired today. And for some reason…”

She looked to Victoria.

“I get the feeling you’ll want to talk to her right afterwards.”

 

* * *

 

Max didn’t have any classes on Monday.

So she could spend all of her Monday morning looking at this text from Chloe. Rereading it a thousand times.

_victoria is cool now. im soz for being a bitch. git some, maxironi._

Max sighed dreamily.

Victoria came through for her. She really did it.

Her friends didn’t hate each other.

Not only did Chloe not hate Victoria anymore, she was _sorry_. She didn’t just grumbly accept that this was going to be a thing. She was actively encouraging it.

Victoria must have tried really hard to prove to her that she changed. What on earth could she have said to her?

Max didn’t bother dressing or anything. She had on her large tee night gown and that was about it.

She was probably just going to be lazy today. She would do absolutely nothing and it would feel great since everything in her life was going well.

Until she heard a knock on her door.

She groaned.

“Who is it?”

There was a moment of quiet.

“’Tori.”

 _Oh_.

She put her phone on her night stand, got up, walked over to her door, and opened it.

Victoria gracefully entered her room. She closed the door. Max barely had time to register anything before Victoria’s arms were around her, tugging her close and tight.

But she _could_ register Victoria’s smiling face looking down at her. The distance didn’t allow Victoria to hide any inch of the natural flush on her cheeks.

“Hi.”

Max was such a nerd. ‘Hi’ was about the only thing that came to her mind.

She giggled.

“Hi.”

But she heard Victoria had a thing for nerds like her, and was willing to go along with her lame opener.

“I uh. Really want to kiss you right now. I can’t believe you got through to Chloe. What did you tell her?”

“The truth. That I wanted to date you and I didn’t care if she shaved my hair off so long as I could.”

Max reached up on her toes to close the distance between their lips.

It was a little awkward at first. Max pushed in too far. There were definitely teeth there. Something hurt. That might be blood. Their eyes were still both open.

But it was nice.

Max pulled away.

Victoria came down instead.

This time, it was smoother. They both closed their eyes. Max’s arms wrapped around and squeezed Victoria. Max lost track of time.

When they separated, Max was vibrating with nervous, happy energy. She felt fizzy all over, like a shaken up soda. And she was breathless. For this while, they didn’t need words. They just looked at each other and enjoyed the intimacy.

For a little while. Then something Victoria said really caught on.

“Did you uh. Really tell Chloe she could shave your hair off just so you could be my girlfriend?”

And the moment was broken. They were both giggling.

And neither of them minded.

Because there would be plenty of other moments not ruined.

Later.

Or now.

Max tugged Victoria deeper into the room, towards her bed.

Victoria groaned. She stopped just on the threshold of Max’s bed.

“Max, I have class. I just wanted to…”

“Are you seriously going to go to class right after making me your girlfriend? Really?”

Victoria crossed her arms.

“Is Max Caulfield telling me to skip class?  Who are you and what have you done with Max?”

Max raised up to kiss Victoria again, still relishing the fuzzy feeling she got after they broke apart.

“I heard some beautiful blonde came back into her life and made everything better. It’s a really cute story, actually …”

Victoria blushed, but allowed herself to be tugged down onto the bed.

“That sounds like a story I’d want to hear.”

There would be plenty of other moments not ruined.

Now.

 

* * *

 

Rachel was mediating in the quietest spot she knew of.

Some ways away from the campus, there was an old junkyard. It was adjacent to some older railroads and a beautiful, mostly untouched forest. The junkyard was Chloe’s favorite haunting ground, excluding any skate parks. The forest was Rachel’s.

She’d been here all morning. Waiting. Listening. She went in deep enough to the forest to only have the sounds of nature. Birds. Trees. Wind.

She knew that this morning Victoria would find Max. Victoria would prove her worth not just to Max, but to herself.

She hoped it would be enough.

If Rachel’s hypothesis was correct, then that would complete her mission, and she would receive the next one. In the loosest, most diffuse possible definition of the word “receive”. And thankfully, they all listened to her suggestion. She could be in the right place at the right time, without Chloe freaking out about her suddenly disappearing. Chloe wouldn’t be up for another few hours.

In order to receive, she needed the quietest environment possible. She needed to be able to listen for the faintest scratching of a voice in the back of her head. Almost inaudible. People like her couldn’t hear the voice unless they made a serious, conscious effort to.

There. That was it. The whisper.

She closed her eyes.

She froze time.

_\--- ferson._

_Jefferson._

_Jefferson._

But that’s all she got.

With a frustrated sigh, she rubbed at her forehead.

What the hell did that mean? Jefferson, one of the photography teachers? What did Fate want with Jefferson?

She needed more.

Rachel probably lived more of her life with time frozen than with it not. This is what she needed to do to be where she needed to be at the right time. So long as she was doing it for the right reasons, she could sustain it indefinitely. Even when she used it selfishly, she could still sustain it for hours without headaches or much difficulty.

Right now, she needed to corroborate with others who could hear the whisper.

And she needed to talk to them immediately after the whisper, or some of them might forget. There wouldn’t be another whisper any time soon.

This meant getting there with time frozen. And that meant there without using vehicles, or even things like scooters or bikes. It had to be just her.

She had a lot of practice just walking everywhere. She had all of the time in the world to think about things.

She made her way back to campus.

To a lot of people, Samuel was just odd. Difficult to talk to. Maybe even a little crazy.

There was a color to his words that Rachel found distinctive the first time she had talked to him.

She knew he heard the whispers too. His fate was intertwined with hers. His fate seemed intertwined with everyone’s.

He was a janitor, but spent much of his time outside, listening to nature. Talking to it.

She unfroze time to talk to him.

“Hi Samuel.”

Of course she was smiling.

He turned to face her.

“Oh. Hi there. The birds are lovely today, aren’t they?”

He never seemed to mind her sudden appearances.

Rachel nodded.

“They are. They talked to me in the old forest by the junkyard. Did you hear what they had to say?”

Samuel paused.

“Oh. Why yes I did. Strangest thing. One of the little ol’ birdies said ‘Max’. I asked them to continue, but that’s all they had for Samuel.”

He smiled.

“I’ll keep feeding them though, in case they say anything else.”

“Thanks, Samuel.”

“Of course, little doe. You tell me if they say anything to you, now.”

Out of earshot, Rachel exhaled in exasperation. Now Max was involved? She had literally just got everything back together again. And with Jefferson …?

She only had one more contact to tap on campus.

She froze time again.

He was a bit more difficult to talk to about this.

She unfroze time behind Nathan.

He was just getting out of his room.

She put a hand on his shoulder.

He turned around to face her.

The color had left his face.

She didn’t know if was out of shock or drugs. Probably both, actually.

“Jesus. Do you have to keep doing that?”

There was agony in his voice. It pained Rachel to talk to him like this about ‘business’.

He put his hands in his jacket pockets.

She closed her eyes and sighed wearily. Then she put on her warmest smile.

“I’m sorry Nate. Did you hear it?”

“Yeahyeahyeah you fuckin’ weirdo. All I heard was ‘Drugs’, ‘kay? Just ‘drugs’. Nothing else. When does this shit stop? You said you needed my help, once, last time. This ain’t once, lady, alright? This is twice. Once occurs one time, one, singular, not twice, double … u … lar – look, point is ---”

“Nathan.”

“Don’t you --- ‘Nathan’ me. I’m fuckin’ hearin’ fucking voices and you fuckin’ appear out fuckin’ of thin air like a goddamn wizard.”

He laughed nervously.

“I’m actually going insane. How do I even know you’re real anymore? You just show up and fix all of V’s problems? You’re probably just my imagination. Just what the hell are you, lady?”

“Nathan. You know what I am.”

She raised a hand and caressed his cheek.

He stilled and sighed painfully.

He then slumped against his door.

“Yeah. Time walker. I heard you. I’ll let you know when I can look that up in a fuckin’ dictionary and get something useful. Fine.”

He hesitated. He needed to know.

“Did it work? Does this mean V’s safe?”

“Yeah. When she whispers again, the last mission was complete. Victoria is safe. She won’t be committing suicide. I think her being able to prove herself to Max was enough.”

“Great.”

She sighed contently.

“Yeah. Great.”

He suddenly stood up straight again.

“Hey – please don’t –“

But she was gone again.

“Fuckin’ … bitch. Leaving me whenever she got what she needs.”

When he looked around, someone else was staring at him. Didn’t recognize the face. Name didn’t matter.

Fine. Let them stare. What else was new.

Maybe he was actually going insane, or maybe he helped Rachel in some weird fuckin’ way to make sure V was safe.

Whatever. He could feel good about it even if it was all in his head. V was safe.

And whatever shit the magic bitch was on now didn’t involve him anymore. He’d tell her to fuck right off next time.

V was safe. And happy, with Max.

His family was safe.


	4. Fate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel learns her fate.
> 
> Mr. Jefferson is annoyed.
> 
> Nathan comes clean.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Beginning of Act II.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Dark room. And, really, just, Jefferson in general.
> 
> This gets worse before it gets better. But it does get better. I promise.

Rachel spent months wracking her brain to figure out what the three clues she had so far could mean.

Trying to decipher Fate’s messages were maddening.

The last whisper, months ago, was even worse.

All she got was _Blackwell_. She hadn’t yet found anyone else who could hear the whispers.

But she knew where to look. Back then, she had to skate around town, looking for homeless people – downtrodden and out of their luck.

She would give them her ear. Buy them some food. Give them some money. Validate who they were. Grieve with them with their loss of self, family, or possessions.

Only after they trusted her could she broach the subject of whispers. And most of them would stop talking to her about then.

It wasn’t like she didn’t get anything out of it. It felt amazing to do what she could to mean something to all of these people. But she rarely got any clues. And if she did, it wouldn’t be timed right. They would hear it too late or too soon.

They had to have heard it within the hour of when she heard hers.

Eventually, she found someone who gave her the clue “death”.

Between the two clues, she was unsettled enough to start attending Blackwell directly.

Rachel guessed Fate probably made these clues so vague and unhelpful so as to get the effect she wanted in a roundabout, indirect way. With her agents fulfilling it organically.

Case in point, in order to figure out _who_ might be dying, she had to befriend pretty much every living soul in Blackwell. She had to know the up-and-up of everything everywhere and try and intuit a failure of her mission.

Then she had to pray to Fate for another chance. Things would start again. The dice would be re-thrown. Little variables would be tweaked here and there. She couldn't do it too often or ask for too far back, though.

Being everything to everyone was exhausting. If she wasn’t able to pause time while sleeping to get an unnatural amount, she would be far too tired to do what she needed to do.

But she knew she was doing it for the right reasons.

She had to keep doing it.

She later figured it out it had to have been referencing Victoria.

She wasn’t able to live with herself after ruining her relationship with Max for good, by proving that she really wasn't capable of changing.

And Victoria did something hasty.

Rachel shivered.

Now, with her last mission completed, she had just the three clues for her next. ‘Jefferson’, ‘Max’, and ‘Drugs’.

If she couched the discussion correctly, she could actually have a weird sort of conversation with Samuel about it.

_Sometimes little birdies need an opportunity to learn to fly out of their nest._

In retrospect, it wasn't all that helpful or practical for her, but it was still nice to be able to talk to someone about this.

Nathan wouldn’t talk to her anymore. He started making the Roman cross with his hands whenever she was alone with him.

It was funny at first, but then just kind of sad. She had pushed him too hard for information. That was her fault. She made a mistake.

She just needed more time to figure out what Fate wanted out of her.

In the meantime, she kept a careful eye on Jefferson and Max.

 

* * *

 

Mr. Jefferson was annoyed.

This had to have been the third time he found Rachel and Max snooping in his files.

He didn’t out-right catch them, though. They would always do it right when he would leave and not be able to return for some time. Rachel’s timing was impeccable. Sometimes he would miss them by seconds.

But he had cameras. He saw everything.

He was a certifiable genius. They would not be able to outsmart him. No one could outsmart him.

Rachel deserved to be punished.

Not just for being impure, but trying to make Max impure.

Max was not impure.

She was the purest creature in this school.

He would have her.

She would look so wonderful under his camera.

She would be the perfect assistant.

She was so calm and tender.

She had the right eye for shots.

One of her projects even imitated his style.

She gushed about the way he framed his shots. The composition. The layers.

She was in love with him.

He was flattered.

With his guidance, she would be able to make wonderful works of art.

Not like Nathan.

Nathan was fidgety and imprecise.

He would ruin something eventually.

He was a liability.

His turn would come.

But not before Mr. Jefferson taught Rachel a lesson in purity.

She deserved to be punished.

Nathan would be useful to him for a little while longer, yet.

 

* * *

 

Max had the worst headache she’d ever experienced in her life. Her vision was blurry beyond all comprehension. Her body felt too stiff. It wouldn’t move. She couldn’t ---

“Ms. Amber. You’re looking lovely tonight.”

Max knew that voice.

It was different. Detached.

Max heard the whir of a camera motor.

“Mmnn…”

Max thought she knew that one too. But it was also different.

Muffled. Terrified. Helpless.

“It is really a shame. Why do the pretty ones always have to be so nosy?”

“Mmmm!”

Another camera sound.

“If you had just kept to yourself, none of this would have happened. I wouldn’t have you, and I wouldn’t have Max. This is your fault. You did this. You ruined everything.”

“Mmmm! Mmm!”

Several camera sounds in quick succession.

“But filthy whores like you can’t help it. I have too much prestige. I am too attractive. I am too smart. You just can’t help it around me.”

Max’s eyes focused. She was bound. There was tape surrounding her wrists and ankles.

She opened her mouth to scream.

Nothing came out. Her mouth was covered.

Max tried to get her eyes to focus even further, to see what was going on past her. Maybe she could find some way out of this situation.

Mr. Jefferson was in front of Rachel. Taunting her. He had polaroid pictures he was forcing her to look at. Rachel was duct-taped to a chair. There was a camera behind them on a tripod. Jefferson had a remote for it in his other hand.

The scene was set up for taking portraits, Max knew from experience. He had lights all around her to ensure the lighting would be just correct.

Max was off to the side, on some kind of bed. She could barely even feel the fabric. It felt like concrete.

She was freaking out. Jefferson was absorbed with Rachel right now and didn’t notice Max had woke up.

Yet.

Then, what would he do to her?

Max could see medical instruments on a sterile table near Rachel’s chair.

Mr. Jefferson wasn’t a surgeon.

There was a long moment where all Max could do is lay there and watch as Jefferson taunted Rachel with picture after picture. Max could hear her crying, but she couldn’t see the front of her face.

She was in some kind of hospital. She thought. The walls were all sterile like some kind of medical lab. Her head still refused to really turn around, her body was so stiff. It simply wouldn’t move.

She heard a horribly loud sound. It reverberated painfully along the walls of the lab – like the sound was constantly shouting at her. She had to close her eyes. She wished she could move her head towards it to see what on earth was generating it. It was overwhelming.

It ended. She was hyperventilating.

“Police!”

Max’s heart jumped.  The police were here. She’d be safe. Maybe. She noticed the gun Mr. Jefferson had on him. This might turn into a fucked-up hostage situation.

“No …”

Jefferson frowned.

His voice was so flat even after he knew the gig was up.

With an exaggerated sigh, he put the pictures and clicker down on a nearby table. He patted down his shirt, fixed his collar, pushed up his glasses, then pulled out his pistol. He pulled the slide back, examined what he saw inside, and allowed a round to eject onto the floor.

He looked up when the slide snapped back into place, and grinned.

Max would never forget that face.

“I’m afraid you won’t live through this, Ms. Amber. Neither of us will. You cannot be allowed to continue. No matter how hard you try, Max will remain pure. My death will be justified.”

Max’s eyes widened.

What on earth was he talking about?

He couldn’t be serious, could he? He was going to murder-suicide? Suicide-by-police?

“We’ve got a body here! Gunshot wound!”

“Contact! Go!”

Max could hear the booming voices of the police offers and the plodding stomping of their boots, but the scene with Rachel and Jefferson had her attention transfixed. Just as well, her head still couldn’t move.

Mr. Jefferson pushed the tip of the pistol against the side of Rachel’s head.

Rachel made a sound that Max also wouldn’t forget. Some kind of horrified, mewling whimper.

Rachel paused. She calmed herself down. She bowed her head.

 

* * *

 

Max woke up with a shaky gasp.

Victoria was wrapped tightly around her.

Max sighed wearily. It was just a dream. It was just a nightmare. It wasn’t real. Victoria was right here. They were just fine.

Max slumped against the bed. Against Victoria.

For a few months, Max’s life at college was just about perfect.

Victoria and her still had some issues to work out. Victoria’s relationship with her family was terrible. Most of her relationships with her friends weren’t healthy. Max still had some relationship anxieties. Okay, a lot. They both had doubts about their future and self-worth.

But Max could spend the rest of her life working them out with Victoria and never feel like it was time wasted. And she knew from every smile that she earned out of Victoria, that she felt the same way.

Things were going well with Rachel and Chloe, too. Chloe talked an awful lot about commitment these days. Max thought it was sweet. She always pictured Chloe as a hopeless romantic, really eager to get into things like that.

Rachel was being a bit weird to Max, though. She had some kind of issue with Jefferson. She didn’t trust him at all. She’d always encourage her to try and sneak around and find something incriminating. They never did really find anything, but Rachel was convinced. For some reason, Max had to be involved with this. Rachel wouldn’t do it alone.

Max furrowed her brow. Maybe Rachel was onto something. The way Jefferson acted in that dream made her skin crawl. But she couldn’t really judge him based on how an imaginary version of him acted in a dream, could she?

She tried to think of the last time she had a nightmare quite like this. One so vivid, and real.

Only one time prior came to mind. Before her date with Victoria, months ago.

It was the only time she had nightmares these days.

It put a worried pit in her stomach.

Nate was staring at her from the couch across Victoria’s room.

What else was new.

Max learned he didn’t sleep very well. He had gotten even worse recently.

At first, it creeped her out. He’d just … sit perfectly still, for hours at a time, doing nothing. Staring. Thinking.

But she saw so much agony in his eyes. There was something in there that was eating him apart. Tearing him to shreds. Just like the problem she had with Victoria.

Still, it took her a long time to get comfortable with Nathan being in the room so casually, particularly as she got closer to Victoria, and spent a greater ratio of her nights enjoying Victoria’s much nicer bed. And Victoria herself, of course.

The staring was accidental, sometimes. He wasn’t always actually paying attention to what he was seeing. He never really meant to make Max uncomfortable.

If Max tried really hard, she could almost get a weird, twisted sense of comfort out of it. Nathan wasn’t going to hurt either of them. And he wouldn’t let anyone try to without going through him, first. He meant well.

Max forced her tired brain into working.

It was ass o’clock, but maybe he had a nightmare too. He didn’t have anyone he could really be together with like she did with Victoria to calm his nerves down.

Max felt sorry for him. She was never really sure if she took Victoria away from him like that, and Victoria never said.

She carefully extracted herself from Victoria’s grasp, and moved to get up and out of the bed.

With a blush, she remembered she was naked.

“Um… Nate, can you …?”

Max quietly whispered.

It took a few seconds for Nathan to process what was happening. He looked down to the floor, at one of the night gowns, then back up to her. Sometimes it was like the gears in his head just stopped entirely.

He sighed and got up. He picked up the offending article of clothing, tossed it at Max’s face, and turned around.

“Let me know when you’re decent. Ain’t like I haven’t seen worse before tho’.”

“Thanks, Nate.”

He was right, but Max always felt extremely vulnerable when naked. It wasn’t just for him. Victoria understood.

There wasn’t any pressure for her to dress any way at night.

She got up out of bed, cupping her own breasts with her hand to keep what she could decent to the nobody that was looking. She put on the night gown and carefully walked over behind Nathan.

Her hand raised. She hesitated.

She almost touched him on the shoulder.

But he never responded well when she did that. He always looked like he just saw a ghost.

Instead, she reached for his hand, and interlocked her fingers with his.

He relaxed.

Sometimes, he needed physical contact like this.

They kept their voices just above a whisper so as to not wake Victoria.

“Are you okay?”

“Fuckin‘… no. When am I ever?”

She squeezed his hand.

“ _Nate_.”

He sighed despondently and turned around. The movement broke their hand contact.

“I had a dream, Max. And it scared the shit out of me.”

Max bit her bottom lip.

“Can we walk and talk?”

They left Victoria’s room and went into the stairwell. It was the closest they could get to privacy, sometimes. The walls in this campus felt too thin, but there was a reassuring thickness to the way their voices echoed in the stair well. Plus, whenever someone entered or exited, the doors would make a dreadful whining sound. They would know when to censor themselves.

Nathan was fully dressed.

Max actually couldn’t remember when he wasn’t. She wondered how often he washed that jacket.

He walked towards the railing, looking down at the descending stars. He leaned against it.

“It was about Rachel.”

Max tried her best to keep her composure. She didn’t like where this conversation was going, but she had to know. If not for her own curiosity, then to make him feel better.

“It’s all my fuckin’ fault. She shows up, I push her away like the asshole I am, then these nightmares start up. She’s gone. I did it. Jefferson’s little bitch. When do I ever do anything right?”

When Nathan was stressed, Max found it particularly hard to make sense of what he was saying. It wasn’t helping that she was still waking up.

But she had to try.

“Nathan. How is this your fault? It’s a dream. You didn’t do anything about that.”

He gritted his teeth and made this pained, nervous laughing sound.

“You don’t get it. I didn’t get it for a while, either. Not until I talked to Rachel. Not until V fucked up with you.”

Max was confused. When did Victoria …?

 _Oh_.

_The dream._

_When did Nate know about that dream?_

The worried pit in her stomach became intractable. Max forced herself to continue.

“What does Rachel have to do with all of this?”

Nathan gave her the most vulnerable look she’d ever seen in her life. His breathing was shallow. His eyes were wide – not from drugs – and his face was pale. His mouth was slightly open.

He tried and failed to start a sentence several times. Finally, he pushed off of the railing, and got close to Max again.

“M-max. You can’t. I can’t. You need to believe me when I say what I’m gonna. It’s going to sound FUCKIN’ crazy but I just ---“

He groaned viciously and looked up towards the ceiling. There wasn’t anything interesting up there.

Max grasped at both of his hands. She squeezed them tightly.

And counted down from 20.

Nathan counted with her.

“0.”

Nathan looked back down to her. His breathing was more even. There was more color in his face. His eyes focused a bit better.

“Please. Max.”

“Nathan. I trust you. Please tell me.”

Nathan couldn’t resist anymore. Not with Max looking at him like that. Not with her trying her hardest to soothe his damage.

“Rachel can control time.”

One of the things Max learned from Victoria was a better sense of how to control her face. She didn’t use it a lot, but it was useful when she absolutely could not have her emotional response ruin a moment.

This was one of those moments. She had to give what Nathan said a few seconds to rest over easy in her brain. She kept his hands in her grip, even when he got nervous about the silence and tried to break way.

Max remembered something.

Rachel was always the one ending her surreal dreams. Always in the same way. Like she was praying.

Nathan wasn’t crazy. Something weird was going on here somehow.

“I believe you.”

He looked skeptical. This was a joke that had gone over cruelly with him before.

“Why?”

She swallowed.

“I saw it in one of my dreams. I think. Back when …”

She swallowed again. _Keep it together, Max._

“Back when I was still trying to reconnect with Victoria, I had this weird, surreal dream. I’ve never had a more vivid or _real_ dream since – not until tonight – but anyway, in this dream, Victoria took me to lunch. You know that lunch? When we were first getting back together? She was a huge bitch. It went over awfully. I yelled at her. She ran away. Then …”

Max closed her eyes. Now or never.

“Then Rachel just … appears. Like she just popped out of thin air. She stops Victoria. She gives me this _look_ that I still can’t really understand. She looks like she’s praying. A-and then the dream is over. I’m awake.”

She shifted on her feet.

“I-I was so tired though, I went right back to sleep and mostly forgot about it. The next morning, I had so much else to think about. U-until tonight, anyway.”

Max bit her lip.

“Nathan. What’s Rachel’s connection with these dreams?”

Max allowed him to finally break away from her grasp. He went back to leaning against the railing. He looked at the floor.

“I-I think it’s part of her powers. She called it ‘rolling the dice’, whatever the fuck that means. She said it was like some kind of alternate reality. Like a warning for what could happen in this one. People learn from them or something. I don’t know. Bitch sounded crazy at the time.”

Max blinked. Her nightmares had actually happened? That meant …

“Why did she tell you all of this?”

He grimaced. He kept looking at the floor. His voice was quiet.

“Why do you think? She wanted some asshole she could share her burden with that no one would believe if he went and ratted her out.”

Max gulped. That didn’t sound like Rachel, but she wouldn’t be surprised if Nathan’s interpretation of events was scathing and uncharitable. She was quiet for a while.

He looked back up to her. His eyes were pleading.

“Max. You have to stay away from Jefferson.”

“Nathan, I have classes with him, I just can’t ---“

“ _Max._ ”

Max composed herself.

“What’s with Mr Jefferson?”

“He…”

Nathan hesitated. Something in his brain clicked. He continued.

“He wanted to buy drugs from me.”

Max’s eyes went wide.

“Y-yeah I know, I’m an idiot, I’m an asshole, I fucked up, I ---“

“ _Nate_.”

“R-right. Anyway. I couldn’t go through with it when he was actually about to buy them. He didn’t want the usual party drugs. He wanted the fucked up stuff I got from Frank. You know? Beach asshole with the dog? Anyway, I squeezed him for why he wanted the fun time stuff and he dodged.”

He grimaced.

“I said no. I wouldn’t sell him the shit. Asshole knocks me out and takes it anyway. When I come to next, there’s this fuckin’ --- “

His voice hitched. His breathing became uneven. He steadied himself.

“--- woman’s body near me. He says he has pictures. I have to fuckin' help him now. Who’s going to believe me over him? It’s all my fault. I just had to sell this awful stuff and ---“

“Nathan. What’s ‘fun time stuff’?”

Nathan paused for a long time. He looked down to the floor again. His voice softened.

“It’s a date rape drug. A special kind. They’re still conscious, they can still feel everything, but they’re more-or-less a doll. Three guesses what you use it for if you’re known for taking fucked-up photos of lifeless women.”

Max’s jaw dropped. The dream. Her dizziness. Her inability to move.

She almost threw up. But Nate was right here, and that’d probably be about the worst thing she could do for trying to comfort him.

“Yeah! I know. I’m an idiot. I’m an asshole. Look, I bought the stuff months ago, before I met you, before V … got better. I was … am, a terrible person, Max. I’m fucked up. No one likes me.”

He then took in a deep breath.

“Well. Almost no one. I’ll … understand if you don’t want to talk to me anymore. No one ever does.”

Max walked back over to him and gave him a forceful, compressing hug.

This was a lot to take in. She didn’t really know how much she could trust.

But she knew Nathan risked a lot in telling her what she did.

He had to know she still cared. No matter what he did.

He could still be better. No one’s fate was set in stone.

Plus, it helped her to settle her queasy stomach.

He paused for a long time, then sniffled, and returned the hug.

“I’m such a fuckin’ pussy, crying about …”

“Shhh.”

Nathan went quiet. He rested his head against Max’s.

And just cried for a long time.

Max skipped her class with Mr. Jefferson.

 

* * *

 

Mr. Jefferson quietly watched Rachel.

He was inside the rest room for staff and faculty.

His arms were crossed, and he was leaning against a window frame.

Rachel was outside, breezily talking with friends.

 _Today_ , he thought.

Today he would correct things.

Today Rachel would be punished.

He smiled.

“Nice day today outside, isn’t it, Mark?”

He didn’t look away.

“One of the nicest days I’ve seen.”

 

* * *

 

Rachel woke up with a wretched gasp.

Chloe was right by her in bed, fast asleep. She didn't wake up.

Rachel looked to Chloe, then just allowed herself to just melt wearily against the bed. 

She knew tears were coming, but she didn't know what to do with them.

Chloe wouldn't understand this at all.

No one that she could talk to would.

Rachel hated everything.

Life wasn’t fair.

She reflected on what had just happened.

She had tried a few times now to avoid Mark, but every time he found her, and she was met with the same result.

She would pray for another chance, to roll the dice again, but every time, she was met with the same result.

She knew what her fate was now, and she wasn’t going to be able to complete her mission.

She sighed severely.

She just needed a moment to collect her thoughts.

She considered her options.

Rachel knew exactly what Jefferson wanted to do, and her fate was with him.

She could theoretically avoid him for infinity, but that would require her to live the rest of her life with time frozen, and that really wasn't an option.

She had tried several ways to make herself scarce and avoid him, but none of them really worked.

If she tried to avoid him too hard - like just getting in her truck and fucking off or something - then it would just mess up even more things; fate would correct her arrogance one way or another.

The punishment might not even come to her.

It might come to Chloe, or Max.

She shivered. As unfair as all of this was to  _her_ , this was even even more unfair on them. Neither of them deserved to feel any consequences of her time chicanery.

Yet the most logical option to her inevitably roped them both in.

Just like in that one time, where Jefferson had caught Max and Rachel, and killed Chloe.

She would probably never forget that night for as long as she lived.

She couldn't let Chloe die again.

And she couldn't just keep on trying. Fate would eventually stop heeding her prayers. Her powers would wane. She'd be in even more trouble, then.

With another sigh, she decided that right now she wouldn't be able to come up with anything useful. She'd already been thinking about this a lot.

She'd sleep and look at it with fresh eyes, tomorrow. Or today, whatever.

But she didn't sleep very well.

 

Going through her classes really didn't help much.

She made it through most of her classes today on muscle memory alone.

She lost track of how many times she'd done this, now. Like some kind of fucked-up version of _Groundhog Day_.

In one of the break periods she had between classes, she saw Max casually talking with Nathan along one of the hall ways. 

This event had already happened in several of her attempts, but she'd always just continue walking and let them have their conversation.

Nathan didn't really want to talk to her. That was fine.

But this time, she decided to see what Max was doing talking to Nathan, since what the hell, why not. Not like she had anything better to do.

She walked up to them.

Nathan still didn't like Rachel.

He sneered at her.

Rachel was expecting that. It didn't break her smile.

But at least he was around people, so he wasn't going to viciously disengage from her. He had an image to maintain.

So he just crossed his arms and leaned against the hall while keeping the harsh look on his face.

Rachel was about to call this a loss, but then.

Max rubbed his arm. That was new. Rachel blinked.

He took a moment to just look at Max. There was a softer look there she hadn't ever seen from him before.

He then put his hands up to drag them down his face.

And groaned all while they were applying pressure, until they came to rest by his sides.

He looked back to Rachel. Softer, this time.

"Look. I'm sorry, alright, lady? You just freaked me out, is all."

It took her a moment to really appreciate that Nathan was being serious.

Rachel wasn't expecting an apology at all - if anything,  _she_ was the one who expected to apologize for pushing him for info about all of this.

He was clearly nervous about the situation.

But Max wasn't letting him get too jittery about it.

She then noticed Max was giving her a harsh, expecting gaze. Something of a glare.

 _Right_ , she probably should accept his apology.

So she did, as well as apologize herself, and try to make pleasant small talk.

Afterwards, Rachel walked away in something of a stupor. 

Did Max care about Nathan?

Did she get through to him?

Was she helping him now?

It made Rachel think.

By the time her last class was finished, she had came up with a devious idea.

Rachel's fate was screwed, but Max's wasn't.

She bowed her head, and asked Fate for another chance.

Not for herself, this time. Her fate was determined.

But for Max. Max had the right temperament.

She cared about everyone. She wouldn’t use it selfishly.

She was the only one.

Rachel was a loyal servant of Fate. She knew that Fate would not ignore her prayer now.

Max would be able to intervene with Jefferson. Somehow.

"Max", "Drugs", "Jefferson". Jefferson had drugs. Max would stop him.

Max would be able to keep Chloe away. Then Chloe wouldn't die.

It was the only way she could make sense of it, now.

Rachel's mission wasn't to stop Jefferson.

Her mission was to help Max stop him. To enable Max to do more good in the world.

Even if the cost of this help was severe.

 

* * *

 

Rachel woke up again.

It never got easier to wake up after everything reset. She'd always have to spend a few minutes recomposing herself.

But because she woke up like this, she knew her prayer had been heard.

Max had a chance to deal with Jefferson, now.

Rachel didn't exactly know how this chance would manifest, but she asked Fate to make Max an agent. Just like Rachel.

Rachel wasn't really sure she could do that, but the fact that everything reset told her that Fate accepted it all the same.

Rachel made her way to the junkyard. She had to make sure Max knew.

She sent a text to Chloe, asking her to come with Max to pick her up at the junkyard. She said she wanted to get breakfast with all three of them.

That wasn't actually her plan. Or at least, it wasn't the whole plan.

Rachel hid herself among some of the dangerous abandoned oil cans.

She had make sure Max knew.

Rachel didn't know about her own powers until she was put into an impossible situation where her will summoned the ability for her unconsciously.

Unfortunately that situation was quite dangerous for her. She could give Max an easier introduction.

If Max _didn't_ catch on, Rachel could freeze time or ask for another chance.

But she had a feeling that Max _would_ catch on.

Just like she planned, Max and Chloe arrived, and then split up to try and find her. They were calling her name.

Max knew about the fire pit. She’d probably check it before Chloe did.

It was a pretty logical place for someone like Rachel to end up.

Max did check out the fire place.

Rachel had to make sure Max knew.

Rachel waited.

She steeled herself.

She could hardly remember the last time her breathing was so heavy.

“Rachel?”

There. Max was right there.

She kicked one of the steel cans right over Max and ---

Max wasn’t where she was a moment ago.

The steel can fell down uselessly to nowhere in particular.

Max knew.

Rachel peeked out from the cans and gave a dopey wave to Max.

“Hi, Max.”

“Rachel… what the _shit_?”

Max sounded like she had just seen a ghost. Looked like it, too. All of the color was out of her face.

If Rachel didn't know better, she'd say Max was a few seconds shy of passing out.

“We… should have a talk.”

Rachel jumped down, made her way over to Max, grasped at her hands, and froze time.

“Alone.”

Max looked around, dazed, and then back to Rachel.

“Rachel. What’s going on?”

“Max. I can control time. And so can you.”


	5. Asleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max learns about her powers.
> 
> Max remembers a seminal moment.
> 
> Mr. Jefferson is appreciative. 
> 
> Rachel goes to sleep.

The color drained out of Max's world.

She took a second to just look around and really take in what was going on.

Nathan was right. 

About everything.

The worried pit in her stomach grew a bit wider. It felt like it would become cancerous soon.

"Are you okay Max? You look like you're about to pass out."

Rachel sounded worried, and she had every reason to be.

Max  _did_ feel like she was about to pass out. Not just for Rachel  _literally stopping time_ but also her just  _holy shit reversing time_ a few seconds ago.

"No. I'm not. Can we ... please just sit down or something?"

The words came out uneasily out of Max's mouth and with considerable difficulty.

Rachel grimaced, but nodded.

"Yeah, alright, that's fair. This is ... an awful lot to take in, I know."

Max and Rachel very carefully sat down next to the fire place.

It was a bit awkward to do it while still holding hands, but they managed.

Rachel insisted she not let go.

Max stared at the naked smoldering ashes.

There weren't any answers for her in the smoke, frozen in time.

But it was not something you saw every day, and she was kind of in a stupor right now.

"Max, please. I really need you to be here with me right now."

Max sighed, and tore her attention away from her racing thoughts to Rachel.

At least her habitual spacing had a calming effect.

She didn't feel like she was going to pass out anymore.

But it wasn't making her feel any better about any of this.

"Rachel. What the hell. Seriously. You didn't tell me or Chloe sooner?"

Rachel frowned.

She then sighed, and looked down at the ground.

"No. I didn't ... Max, Chloe wouldn't be a good influence if she knew what I could do. She'd want me to use it irresponsibly."

Max frowned too.

But she knew that Rachel was correct. Chloe would probably think of doing stupid, but ultimately harmless things with it, like pranks or petty theft.

Max probably wouldn't want that constantly bugging her either, if she had them.

"Alright, fine. Chloe would be kind of a bad idea. But me?"

Rachel grimaced again. Her voice was quieter.

"You were just getting your life together. Victoria's so happy with you. I didn't ... I didn't want to interrupt unless I absolutely had to."

Max didn't miss Rachel's words.

_Unless I absolutely had to._

She squeezed Rachel's hand.

"So you have to, now."

Rachel nodded gloomily. 

"Yeah... Max, Ma --- Mr. Jefferson is about to abduct me."

Max sighed.

"I saw that in one of my dreams."

Rachel flinched.

"Dammit. I was hoping you wouldn't wake up ..."

Max narrowed her eyes.

"What?"

Rachel's eyes widened, and she remembered herself.

"Oh, right, um. When I do my thing. Give me like ... a second. Wanna' find a way to explain this that won't sound insane."

Rachel now stared at the lifeless smoke coming from the smoldering vestiges of the fire pit.

Despite everyone seeking it for wisdom, the frozen smoke still had nothing to offer.

"So. Max. I can pause time. It runs in my family. We're 'time walkers', loyal servants of the goddess of Fate."

Max stayed quiet, but didn't look away from Rachel. Rachel couldn't meet Max's eyes.

"We listen to her for what she requires of us. It's ... difficult, and a little maddening, but her whispers always result in more good of the world if we listen to them. So we do."

She then looked back to Max.

"But I'm different. My parents can _only_ pause time. I can do that, but ... I can also ask her for things to be different. To try the day or week again, in a little bit different of a way. She takes the liberty of fulfilling a few other prayers that people have for her at once, so the world's a little different each time. But I can trigger the resets directly. Little variables are tweaked. People act slightly differently. But the world is mostly the same."

Rachel looked to the smoke and closed her eyes. She sighed deeply.

"When I first learned what Mr. Jefferson was going to do to me, I asked for another chance. I got in my truck and drove to the beach. Fuck 'em. He wouldn't know I'd be there. But ..." 

She frowned.

"This only made him even more angry. Instead of abducting me, he took you, and then taunted Chloe about it. He knew she'd just charge in without thinking. Chloe's... really protective, you know. And a little violent."

Rachel was quiet for a while. 

"He killed Chloe and used her phone to figure out where I was by posing as her in a text. Then he got me."

Her voice sounded distant by now.

"Then he just tortured me for a while for my arrogance."

She shook her head and looked back to Max.

Max noticed there was less color in her face.

"When I ask for another chance, some people will sometimes remember what happened, typically those with the most emotional involvement in the situation. It'll be like a dream or something. I was hoping you wouldn't have to ... experience ... any of that."

Max was speechless.

A lot of this was what Nathan had already told her, but it was still overwhelming. 

Plus, she could have a reasonable doubt of what Nathan had to say. His perspective was very negative, and he exaggerated sometimes.

But he wasn't doing either of those things, this time.

"So my nightmares ... they actually happened?"

Rachel nodded slowly.

"More-or-less."

Nathan told her the truth.

Max pursed her lips into a fine line.

"And... you want me to help you do today differently?"

Rachel nodded again.

"In a way. It'll take you a while to get used to pausing time probably but ---"

Max shook her head and squeezed Rachel's hand again.

"Uh, no, I don't, uh, pause time. I rewind it."

Rachel's mouth opened but nothing really came out. She blinked a few times.

Max felt embarrassed and self-conscious for no other reason than Rachel's scandalized look.

"Well. That's new."

Max frowned.

"You can't rewind time?"

Rachel shook her head.

"Not directly. Like I said, I just ask Fate to reset things for me. I just pause it."

Max groaned.

"So why the _fuck_ were you kicking oil drums on me?"

Rachel giggled tiredly, despite it all.

"Max Caulfield, cursing like a sailor. Victoria's influence on you is so healthy."

Max sighed and squeezed Rachel's hand again.

"Rachel. This is serious."

Rachel frowned slightly. Her voice came out halting and unsteady.

"Y-yeah... I know, I just..."

She looked to the floor.

"I'm coping with my own mortality the only way I know how. But ... anyway."

Max flinched. She didn't even think how hard this must have been on Rachel.

All Max did was rewind a few seconds and her head already felt like it was going to jump off and run away without her.

She already felt so tired. Is this what Rachel felt all of this time? Is this the burden she was just carrying?

Max felt like an enormous asshole for getting upset at Rachel.

Which was impressive, given that Rachel just tried to kill her a few minutes ago.

Rachel steadied her voice.

"People can have their powers from Fate without realizing it. You need a moment of crisis where your survival instinct or will kicks in and demands the use of it. I ... I kicked it down on you so you'd have a way to do that without being in serious mortal danger. I'd just freeze time and ask for another chance if that failed, and find another way to do it."

Max was horrified.

Just what kind of fucked-up effect were these powers having on her if that was the first thing Rachel thought to do? First, abusing Nathan for information, now this?

This wasn't the Rachel she knew.

"You'd just try to kill me first without even telling me or anything?"

"I ..."

Rachel was speechless. She couldn't meet Max's gaze again.

"Rachel. How many times have you seen me or Chloe die?"

Rachel bit her lip.

"Rachel."

"... more than once."

Max's mouth went wide open. Rachel looked back up to her. Her eyes were pleading and her voice was quick. She was jittery.

"Look, Max, please. I didn't ... Not like that. You need that emotional involvement in the situation. The powers won't come to you otherwise. You have to remember that moment and use it to know how to use your powers in the future. It'll be kind of shitty at first, but it'll get easier the more you do it."

She bit her lip.

"Just um, uh. Don't use them too often or too selfishly. You need more affinity with Fate before you can use them for extended periods of time. She controls all of the powers. If you don't have any goodwill with her built up, they'll... start consuming you, directly. A lot of agents --- people who have powers from Fate --- go insane from their disassociation with their lives after they use their powers too much. They end up being unable to tell who they are anymore, since the powers change them so much."

Max was still struggling to process the information that Rachel had seen them die a few times. Was it all because of Jefferson?

What else was this asshole ruining?

Rachel sucked in a deep breath.

"I've lost you, great, okay, I'm a sociopath, I get it, I just --- "

Max squeezed Rachel's hand.

"No, I'm just ... thinking. About Jefferson, about this weight you're carrying, about what all of this means..."

Max sighed. Rachel looked slightly more at-ease, but she still hadn't recovered from Max's piercing question earlier.

Good. She shouldn't. 

"So. What does this mean for now? You've already tried a lot to avoid Jefferson, and you just can't?"

Rachel nodded, slowly.

"My fate is with him. I can't avoid it too much, or like I said, Fate corrects my arrogance in increasingly painful ways. I can't ... I don't want to see Chloe die again, Max. And I don't know how much goodwill I have left with Fate to use on this."

Max nodded as well, albeit very numbly.

"So what do you want me to do?"

Rachel sighed severely.

"Jefferson wants me. I'll ... I won't resist this time."

Max opened her mouth to say something, but Rachel cut her off.

" --- and you'll keep Chloe away from the bunker. She can't know about this. About what will happen to me. Just let her believe that I went missing, or something. I don't know."

Max gulped. She was terrible at lying to Chloe. Rachel was asking a lot.

"And Jefferson?"

Rachel frowned.

"Use your powers to make sure he's stopped for good. You'll need to practice. And that practice..."

Rachel sighed hopelessly. She just looked at the ground and slumped down.

"Will mean you won't be able to save me from dying. You'll need at least a month or two to figure out everything, like where Jefferson is hiding out ..."

Max tried and failed to start a few sentence a few times.

Eventually,

"Rachel --- I can't --- you --- _no_. I can't let you die. I can't ... _lie_ to Chloe like that. I _can't_ ..."

Max hoped the pain in her voice was more convincing than the substance.

Rachel frowned. She looked back up to Max.

There were tears in her eyes, now.

"Max. If you try and save me, Jefferson will have you, and he will kill Chloe. The world will be an objectively worse place. Whatever happens, you _can't_ let Jefferson win. Stalk him and call the police on him the next time he abducts someone or something. Rewind if he gets too suspicious of you. I don't know, just ..."

Max wondered if she was in shock or something. She could see Rachel crying, hear her voice becoming halting and fragile, but Max wasn't fully processing that emotion.

It was weird and unsettling. It felt like nothing mattered in the world anymore. She couldn't _feel_.

Max looked to the sky.

Even getting all of the answers from Rachel didn't satisfy.

Her world was suddenly much more complicated.

She was quiet for a long time.

Max considered her options.

She didn't like anything about this.

She didn't want these powers.

She didn't want the responsibility. 

She didn't want the pain she heard in Rachel's voice.

Or the weight she carried.

Or the distance in her eyes when she was casually talking about  _trying to kill Max_.

But Rachel had already tried to do this several times. 

Rachel was far more comfortable with her powers.

What could Max do?

"Okay."

She could listen to Rachel.

And do what she could to make sure Jefferson wasn't going to do any more harm past her.

She'd practice religiously. 

She'd keep Chloe safe.

Max couldn't lose Chloe. 

They stayed with the time frozen for another good long while.

Max had no frame of reference of how long, exactly, while in here, with time frozen. Her phone didn't even work. 

But it was nice to have a moment to just stay in this frozen world.

To listen to the blood rushing her head.

To the heavy breathing of her and Rachel.

To the end of her world, as she knew it.

 

* * *

 

Breakfast wasn’t comfortable.

Max looked at her food awkwardly.

She wasn’t all that hungry.

The worried pit in her stomach felt it was consuming most of her chest now.

It probably wasn’t healthy.

But the staring was very obvious, and Chloe knew Max was never one to skip breakfast.

Max was never one to just stare at her food, either.

Max was never one who could fucking control time.

Chloe shoved Max’s plate towards her.

“Dude, eat. You look like you’re about to pass out.”

Chloe sounded concerned.

Rachel gave Max a dangerous kind of look.

Max frowned.

She hadn't told Chloe.

She was going to tell Chloe.

And it was going to tear her apart.

But she could at least eat. 

And she could watch Chloe doing her silly antics to try and improve their moods.

It helped, in some tiny, inconsequential way.

Max needed all of the help she could get.

 

* * *

  

Max's camera clicked and whirred, contently producing another Polaroid for her.

She picked out the picture and shook it gently.

The squirrel, her subject, felt slighted, and immediately vacated.

That was okay. It had already done that earlier.

She just rewound time to try and get a good picture of it.

And it was a pretty good picture, all considering. Nothing was obviously wrong with it.

This was Max's idea of getting practice in with using her powers.

As a side effect, it was deeply important to soothing the tremendous anxiety in her gut.

Nature photography was so relaxing and so disciplined.

She could cheat a little bit, now that she could control time, but ...

It still counted.

And she did find what Rachel said to be true. It _was_ getting easier to use her powers the more she used them.

She had used them in various ways to try out different conversations.

And once or twice to try something creative with Victoria, since she could always rewind if it went over poorly.

Max wondered for a while why Rachel didn't use her powers to make herself filthy rich or something.

To just fuck off with Chloe somewhere far away.

She talked about using her powers 'selfishly'.

Max couldn't figure out exactly what it meant.

It probably meant no making yourself filthy rich, actually, but nothing Max did, yet, seemed to qualify.

Maybe the universe would decide to fuck her over too if she kept using it for frivolous things. 

Maybe Rachel didn't know everything.

Maybe they had different rules to follow.

Rachel seemed she could use her powers effortlessly and indefinitely. The entire time they were having a conversation with time frozen and Rachel was none the wiser.

Max couldn't rewind for more than a few seconds without feeling like she was going to pass out.

And she could tell the nature of her control was different, somehow.

She could take pictures while time was reversing and her phone worked - she checked.

Nothing seemed to work in Rachel's time pause. Not her phone. Not nothing.

Max saw a deer off in the distance.

She had to get a close-up shot of that.

Max always liked deer.

 

* * *

 

Max didn't fully appreciate how much her body was keeping her  _functional_ and  _coherent_ until she laid down on her bed, tonight.

She fell apart.

It was like all of the emotions she should have been  _feeling_ in her conversation with Rachel hit her, all at once, magnified.

Max wasn’t sure if she had ever cried so much before in her life.

She cried until the tears stopped coming. Until every part of her body ached, until she could barely see.

She'd all but moved out of her room and into Victoria's.

Her own bed felt strange and empty now.

But she wanted to be alone.

She wanted the peace and quiet.

Her life was over.

Rachel would be gone soon.

Chloe would be devastated.

She'd probably go on some vindictive witch hunt to try and find Rachel and do unspeakable things to whoever took Rachel from her.

Max's personal life would be in shambles again.

Chloe was still a hugely important friend, and provided her with a lot of balance in her life.

Chloe's energy and general happy vibes always made her day a bit brighter.

She was a good friend.

Chloe didn't deserve this.

Rachel was a good friend, too.

There was more distance between them and Max felt a little awkward being on her Mr. Jefferson witch-hunt - at first - but Rachel was genuinely one of the nicest people she's ever met.

And she always knew exactly what to say or do to make things better.

The reason why was obvious, in hind sight.

Max wondered what Rachel would be like, without her powers.

Rachel didn't deserve this.

Max didn't deserve this.

These powers would come with _stupid_ responsibilities that she didn’t _want_ or _ask_ for.

She wasn't a super hero.

She couldn't change the world.

She was just some dumb college kid who lucked herself into some amazing relationships.

No amount of crying in the world was making her feel any better about it.

And when the tears stopped coming and the numbness came, she still didn't feel any better.

She just curled up on her bed and felt miserable.

For what had to have been hours.

Then, just right when she was about to fall asleep,

_No._

A sudden, dangerous thought bubbled up from the deepest parts of her core.

 _No_.

Rachel was not going to die.

Chloe was not going to die.

Max's life wasn't going to fall apart just right when she got it together again.

Rachel was blinded by her experience with fate. By the big picture. Max heard it clearly -  _the world will be an objectively worse place_.

This was a zero-sum game to her.

But it wasn't.

This was a series of little pictures that made up the bigger picture.

And Rachel not being in these pictures made the bigger picture not worth having.

Max still couldn't use her rewind powers for more than a few seconds. 

Her practice  _was_ making it easier to use, but she was only going from two seconds to five, not seconds to minutes, or hours, or forever.

And Rachel thought Max wouldn't be able to save her since Max needed time to figure out Jefferson and her powers.

Well, Max already knew how to rewind, and it's not like she could do much else.

And she wasn't just her powers.

She had friends that could help her.

Like Nathan, who was blackmailed into helping Jefferson.

He would know where Jefferson would take her.

Max would go there.

With Chloe.

They would save Rachel.

Max wouldn't let Chloe just charge off and die like Rachel said she would.

Max could steady her.

Max would rewind until everything went just right.

What did Rachel say?

That Max's powers would 'consume' her if she used them too much?

Fine. 

Let it do that.

Chloe didn’t deserve this.

Rachel didn't deserve this.

Max didn't deserve this.

Max was more resolved than she’d ever been.

Tomorrow, everything would change.

Tomorrow, she would find Rachel.

Tomorrow, she would get her life back.

Or she would die trying.

The storms on Max’s horizon had her dreaming of the last time her life changed so severely.

Max wasn’t sure if it qualified as a nightmare.

Anymore.

 

* * *

 

Max stared at ceiling in Victoria’s old room, in Seattle.

She was laying down on Victoria’s bed, trying to not be a huge snoop and listen in to the arguing going on outside the room.

But she was, so she did.

Resistance was futile, anyway. Their voices were raised and she’d have to be deaf not to hear it.

“What did we tell you about your grades, young lady?”

“Dad! It’s just a ‘B’. It’s not going to tank my future.”

“Do you think the president of the united states gets a ‘B’? Or how about the chief of medicine of Seattle Regional?”

“ _Dad_ … there’s never been a woman president.”

“And there won’t be, if every young lady has your attitude.”

She could hear Mr. Chase sigh severely.

“Victoria, Chases don’t get ‘B’s in classes. We’re leaders. Trendsetters. You’re going to be something, someday, and you’ll be thankful you had such a rigorous up-bringing.”

Max was conflicted about Victoria’s parents.

Her dad wasn’t upset just because Victoria got a ‘B’. He was upset that she got a ‘B’ because he thought that would seriously hurt her down the line in trying to be something big and impressive.

He wanted the best out of her. He cared. But there was a mismatch between his expectations and reality, and the only way he seemed to know how to deal with this was through discipline and stern talking.

And that’s not what Victoria needed. Max wasn’t sure that’s what anyone needed.

Max came to appreciate the way her parents were always supportive, even if her grades were less-than-stellar at times.

She heard the door to the room opening.

Max sat up on the bed, and gently kicked her feet back and forth off of the bed’s side. She tried her best to look very interested in the pattern on Victoria’s wall.

“Oh. Maxine. Good afternoon.”

Max kept her composure. She had told Mr. Chase several times her name was “Max” and not “Maxine”, but he insisted. She looked back towards the door to meet his gaze and tried to give him a warm smile. Victoria followed in right behind him.

Mr. Chase was a tall, broad-shouldered man. He always wore dress pants, a dress shirt, and at least a tie, if not a full suit. His hair had an oily darkness to it and was kept short. He was cleanly-shaven and had a hard-set jaw.

If it wasn’t for his awful personality, he’d be attractive.

But Max couldn’t really meet his eyes for very long. There was an intensity to them that made her uncomfortable and the way he’d always lock onto her and stay fixed only exacerbated it.

“Good afternoon, Mister Chase.”

He made a flat grunting sound.

Max gulped.

“What are you doing here?”

Victoria looked up.

“Dad! I inv--”

He looked to her. Max couldn’t see quite what Victoria did see, but she could see Victoria flinch and shrink underneath his gaze.

“Quiet, young lady.”

Victoria slowly lowered her head, crossing her arms. This was a different kind of posture to her usual one, her arms were more hugging herself than projecting.

Max bit her lip.

He looked back to Max.

Max had been spending an awful lot of nights at Victoria’s house. Max’s parents didn’t mind at all – they were happy she was making friends, especially ones she could be around so often. However, Victoria’s parents, in particular her dad, didn’t care for Max in the slightest. Max couldn’t really figure out why, but it was getting worse instead of better, no matter how kind and warm she was to them.

“I uhm… I brought my guitar over. I was going to help Victoria with her music class.”

Max nodded to the end of the bed, where she had rested her guitar.

He crossed his arms.

“Is that so.”

The words were a question, but his tone of voice made it a fact. He looked over to Victoria.

“You told her that was the class, didn’t you?”

Victoria didn’t say anything.

“Answer me.”

“No, sir. Max is good at music. I needed help.”

Victoria’s voice was flat and unfeeling, now. Max always hated this effect that her parents had on her.

But this seemed to satisfy him, at least.

“Fine. Maxine, you will help her until no later than 10pm. Victoria, we’ll talk about this, later.”

He uncrossed his arms, turned on his heel, and walked out of the room.

He closed the door a bit too loudly.

Victoria flinched.

Max sighed.

It was quiet for a few moments.

Victoria didn’t move.

Max texted her parents to tell her to come pick her up at 10 since there was no way she was going to give Victoria’s parents any ammo whatsoever to hate her with.

When Max was finished, Victoria was still looking at a wall.

Max frowned, and got up off of the bed to walk up behind her.

Max gingerly slid her arms around and hooked her fingers together around Victoria’s belly.

She was stiff and unfeeling at first, but eventually sighed and loosened her shoulders and posture.

“Max…”

Since early in their relationship, they had a lot of physical contact. Max didn’t know quite why yet, but it always felt so natural and easy.

This was not usual. Even just hugging Chloe for a while would begin to feel awkward, and Max was pretty sure she had a crush there.

Max could lay in bed beside Victoria for hours and never feel awkward or self-conscious, even when tangled up with her.

It was nice.

“Tori.”

“Please, just, let’s …”

Her voice was halting. It broke Max’s heart. Victoria tried to move, but Max made a whining sound and tightened her group.

“Not while you’ve got sadbrains again.”

“ _Max_. This is serious.”

Max rested her forehead against the back of Victoria’s head. She breathed down her back and neck. Victoria shivered.

“I’m being serious, too.”

Victoria sighed and allowed herself to be hugged for another minute or so. She craned her head upwards a bit so as to press her head against Max’s forehead and just generally try to relax.

Eventually, they made their way over to her bed, and sat side-by-side.

Victoria looked at the ground.

“Feeling better?”

“No.”

“Want to talk about it?”

Victoria sighed.

“No.”

Max frowned.

Max considered her options.

She snaked one of her hands over and interlocked her fingers with a set of Victoria’s. She shrank further, but the grip was steady.

Max could see the relationship with her parents was tearing Victoria apart. She needed to know just how much Max cared for her. Max could soothe Victoria’s demons if she just let her.

But Max couldn’t put the words in the right order or have them come out in the right way. She tried several times, but always chickened out and dodged to something else.

Max scooted closer until she was practically flush. She rested her head on Victoria’s shoulder.

“Hey.”

Victoria didn’t respond.

Max couldn’t put the words there, but maybe she could _show_ her. Words came difficult to her. Intimacy with Victoria didn’t.

Max kissed at Victoria’s neck. She’d done this once or twice before and knew how much Victoria liked it. She shivered.

Max’s heart was going faster than she thought it would when she started to slowly raise her face up to try and kiss somewhere else.

She closed her eyes.

She ended up kissing Victoria’s finger, instead. Max’s eyes shot wide open. Victoria had raised up the finger at some point and had pulled her face away so as to divert Max’s attention.

“Max. No.”

Max couldn’t believe it. Her jaw dropped.

She didn’t really know what to do with her hands or, actually, any part of her body, right now. Victoria’s other hand dislodged itself from Max’s and pushed away.

“I …”

Max deflated. She looked at the ground. She placed her hands in her own lap and just tried to stop the tears or sniffling before they came.

Victoria stood up. Her voice was wavering, quiet, pained, desolate. Max could go her whole life without hearing it like that ever again.

“Max. I can’t … be friends with … a girl who … likes me … that way.”

Max’s heart sank.

What did being a girl have to do with any of this?

_Oh._

Max slumped a little bit further. Her arms came up to hug at herself weakly.

She wasn’t sure if she just looked hella gay or something.

Chloe said she did, but Chloe said lots of things.

It seemed alarmingly easy for everyone else around her to ferret out that there was more going on between her and Victoria than just being friends. Even her own mother had sat her down to have a conversation with her that Victoria might not be the same way.

Max didn’t believe it, then.

She’d even heard the word “girlfriend” a few times – usually from Chloe -- but Max made a point of not thinking about that. That word just put all kinds of anxious butterflies in her stomach.

It seemed so obvious to everyone, yet here Victoria was, contradicting it in the most painful way possible.

Victoria cleared her throat and steadied her voice. In private, she always gave Max more time to just space out and think. She understood.

“After tonight, I don’t want to see you, ever again.”

Max’s eyes widened. She had to do _something._

“Tori I ---”

“ _Don’t_ call me _that_ \---”

Max flinched but continued on anyway,                                                                        

“Victoria, please, I can’t … I don’t … without you…”

Max trailed off. She didn’t have the words again.

Victoria was quiet for a few moments.

“I know.”

Victoria walked out of the room. Her head was bowed the entire time.

The tears came freely, now.

She’d fucked up and lost her only friend in Seattle because of her stupid emotions. Because of her stupid need to be close to people. To be close to Victoria.

Max didn’t know what she was going to do at school, tomorrow, without her. They spent basically every moment outside of classes together in some fashion or another, and usually went home together to one of their houses.

Max flopped back onto Victoria’s bed. She turned her head to smell at the fabric and enjoy the last vestiges of Victoria Chase before she was expelled from her life forever.

Max hoped she was just being dramatic because of the tension with her parents. This sometimes happened. Max and Victoria would fight; Max would be upset. Victoria would apologize. They would heal, and learn how to avoid this in the future. Max would always feel closer to Victoria if they dealt with their problems head-on instead of letting them fester.

Victoria wasn’t just being dramatic.

Later that night, she didn’t respond to anything Max did. No calls, no text, no IMs, no nothing.

Later that week, she didn’t respond.

Later that month, she didn’t respond.

At the start of the next school year, she didn’t respond.

Max gave up after that. She just watched helplessly as the only interesting thing in Seattle drifted away from her and became more damaged and spined.

Max poured her heart out to Chloe.

It only helped a little bit. Chloe was great at teasing Max and taking her from a bad mood to a good one, or a good one to an awesome one, but she wasn’t good with emotional vulnerability and damage.

Max was changed ever since that moment. She wasn’t going to make that mistake again. She wasn’t going to lose anyone else.

Especially not Chloe.

She wouldn't taint that friendship with her stupid feelings, either.

 

* * *

 

Mr. Jefferson calmly graded some papers on his desk.

It was late in the afternoon.

The project from Max and Victoria looked good.

Max had an eye for good shots. She was a natural photographer.

But she was naïve and refused to use the technology that would take her shots from just acceptable to brilliant.

She shot on ancient technology. It took too long to develop any professional shots.

They were difficult to recover or manipulate if they were slightly incorrect.

She often didn’t expose her shots correctly, and her camera was too old to take pictures in series with different exposure to compensate.

Victoria was the opposite. 

Victoria knew every little piece of technology in and out.

She was fantastically skilled on a technical level.

She could probably tell you what every little piece of the camera did, and how it could be manipulated to change a shot.

But she had no idea how to actually find an interesting thing to take a picture of.

All of her shots were sophisticated and technically breathtaking, but as emotionally involved as a blank piece of paper.

They worked well together.

They were his favorite students.

He wondered what they would look like, together, under his camera.

The thought excited him.

Rachel came into his class room. She was smiling.

She always was.

For the past few months, Rachel had made herself very useful.

She used the extra-circular work he gave her to snoop.

He knew everything.

But she found nothing, and he got more work done with her help.

Mr. Jefferson appreciated her efforts very dearly.

“Hi Mark.”

He frowned.

“Rachel. We’ve been over this. I am Mr. Jefferson to you.”

“Okay, Mr. Jefferson.”

She meant well.

But she was impure.

“Rachel. I need your help with something in the back room. I have a lot of photos to develop.”

“Okay, Mr. Jefferson.”

He got up from his desk.

She was a whore. Starved for attention and fame.

She deserved to be punished.

He just had to make sure it didn't happen like his dreams.

He shuddered.

He risked doing harm to Max by capturing her like that.

But Rachel couldn't outsmart him.

No one could out smart him.

He was a fucking genius.

 

* * *

 

"Sean."

"It's me."

"It's happening tomorrow night."

"I just need to make sure you'll be there in case anyone tries to stop it."

"Call it a ... premonition."

"Yes, just like that."

"Yes, he's doing fine."

"No, I couldn't get him to do that. No matter; I had someone in mind anyway."

"Thank you. You're such a good friend."

 

* * *

 

Rachel could hardly contain her composure. Her breathing was shallow and uneven. She had a cold sweat.

She had to do this. It was her fate. Her destiny.

Mark guided her out of the class room and into one of the specialized rooms just for photography classes.

It was very dark. There was only the faintest of red glow being cast onto the rows and rows of chemical baths, each with pictures eagerly awaiting the next step of development.

Developing analog photos was a tedious process. But some effects just had to be done on real film with real chemicals – the digital world hadn’t replaced everything, quite yet.

Mark instructed her to a series of photos that needed work on them still.

With great apprehension, she took to it.

 

_“You’re so nervous today, Rachel.”_

 

Jefferson's voice had an oddly ethereal quality to it right now.

She knew exactly what he was going to say.

She knew what exactly was going to happen.

His voice sounded like it was coming from within her head.

From off of the walls.

From his mouth.

It was everywhere. 

She closed her eyes.

She heard latex gloves being put on.

 

_“You’ve been nervous a lot, lately, actually.”_

 

She thought of the way Victoria had really pulled through for Max.

She could change.

She did change.

She was better, now.

More well-adjusted.

These past few months, she rarely even saw Victoria scowl unnecessarily.

Max would always be around to rub her arm and remind her that she didn’t have to be that person any more.

Victoria even smiled and laughed in public.

She was happier.

Rachel might have even seen her with Warren, once or twice.

 

_"I'm very concerned about your well-being."_

 

She thought of how much Max had grown up.

Victoria’s influence on her was healthy.

Positive.

According to Chloe, she used to be a nervous wreck all of the time.

She could hardly even finish a sentence without stammering or speaking haltingly.

Max was confident around Victoria.

Happy in herself.

Happy in who she was.

Who she became.

Chloe said Max started taking photos again, the first time in three years, after she had patched things up with Victoria.

Said she started to like how her photos came out. After Victoria started to help her.

Said she was starting to submit her photos, with Victoria, to places.

They were both so nervous about it, but they could be nervous about it, together.

Victoria and Max were going to be famous, some day.

 

_“Tell me Rachel, is it stress?”_

 

She thought of the way that Nathan told his family to fuck _right off_.

How he said he didn’t need their damn money anymore.

He had people who cared about him past that, now.

He was less jittery these days.

He still went to parties, but he did less drugs.

He drank less.

His voice was more even.

Rachel wondered how much of that was because of Max, and Max's influence on Victoria.

He had a healthy support structure, now.

What could a Prescott with a conscience do for the world?

The last one basically built this city. 

 

_“I hear that’s really not good for a young, nubile, developing woman’s body.”_

 

She thought of Chloe.

She thought of the way Chloe looked at her.

The way she got bashful when Rachel teased her – and only when Rachel teased her.

She thought of the way they moved in together.

And how Chloe kept her sane when the stress of being this superhero was unimaginable.

Chloe was so perfect

With all of her imperfections and all of her faults.

 

_“Chronic stress is one of the leading for people dropping out of college, you know."_

 

She thought of the way they kissed.

The way Chloe's hands knew their way around her body.

She thought of the way Chloe got down on one knee, late last week.

The way the diamond had to have been way outside of Chloe’s price range.

She thought of all of the tears they shared that night.

And all of the plans they made.

 

_“It can cause people to do all sorts of miserable things.”_

 

She thought of how she said _yes_.

And how she put her ring in Max's pocket when she wasn't looking.

So Jefferson wouldn't have the pleasure of taking it from her.

He wasn't going to take that from her.

He wouldn't be able to violate that part.

No matter how hard he tried.

Max would understand.

 

_“You should **relax**.”_

 

She thought of how her tears were going to ruin these photos.

But that one, she didn't care about.

Since Mark could fucking deal with it.

 

She knew the needle was coming.

It didn't make it any less shocking when it violated her neck.

When her body seized up, and the coldness traveled through her, she thought of how this universe had turned out.

 

Her conscience was clear.

Max wouldn’t be there when she woke up.

Chloe wouldn’t die by Mark’s hands.

Her sacrifice would ensure all of her work wasn’t undone.

 

Chloe would hurt for a while, but Max and Victoria would be there for her.

She would heal.

She would be a better person.

Chloe was tough like that.

Chloe had to be tough like that.

 

Max would stop Mark later.

She would make the world better with her powers.

She could do so much more

With the the ability to rewind.

Max could truly be 

Perfect.

Rachel couldn't think of anyone better to replace her.

 

This world wouldn’t be a worse place

No matter how hard

Mark Jefferson

Tried to fuck it up.

 

Rachel closed her eyes

And thanked Fate

For giving her the opportunity

To make this world as 

Perfect

As it could be.

 

Despite it all

When Rachel fell asleep

It was peaceful.

She was smiling.

Dreamless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.


	6. Timeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max trains.
> 
> Chloe is violent.
> 
> Nathan's conscience is clear.
> 
> Mr. Jefferson is a fucking genius.
> 
> Rachel is speechless.

Tomorrow didn’t come quickly enough.

Last night, Max woke up after her dream. 

She had made her way to Victoria's room since she wanted the reassurance that everything was okay.

Nathan found her outside of the room that night.

She told him everything.

She thanked him again for trusting her with what he did, earlier.

Jefferson asked Nathan to help him.

He cried. He didn't want to be another Jefferson.

But Max had a plan, now. She shared it with him. She asked for his help with it.

They had a plan, now.

Today, it was all going to happen.

Today, Max would train.

Today, Nathan would figure out what to do to get Max to Jefferson and Rachel.

And he would tell Victoria what she needed to know.

 

Victoria was worried. In her own way.

She probably didn’t think it was a good thing to be dropping her girlfriend off at some creepy junkyard in the middle of the afternoon like this.

She could deal, for now. Max was more assured of this than anything else in her life.

Max didn’t actually know how she was going to stop Jefferson, exactly. Rachel was unhelpful yesterday, too.

Like Max’s powers would just suddenly let her deal with a violent murderous psychopath breezily.

She couldn’t pause time like Rachel and just disarm him or something.

Max wasn't even sure if Rachel could, either. Maybe she couldn't even manipulate anything at all, and just had to "walk".

Max still didn't have all that much practice to constantly rewind.

She needed a good plan that she could fine-tune with her powers, not base her entire plan of attack on them.

He was much taller than her.

He had access to much more technology and money.

He was more connected.

By all accounts, he was more successful and stronger. 

In her dreams, the police seemed like it'd work, but Rachel wouldn't survive a police intervention. So that was a non-starter.

About the only thing she had to go off of was Nathan’s incessancy in explaining Jefferson’s ego as bigger than several celestial bodies.

And the weird thing Jefferson had for Max? That she was pure?

The idea made her skin crawl. But it was still something she could use.

A gun would equalize the power difference.

Max didn’t know how to shoot a gun.

Even if she did, she knew that if it came down to it, she wouldn’t be able to pull the trigger.

But she knew someone who would.

Chloe.

Rachel said what Chloe would do. She would rush off ahead.

Max could steady her.

She’d have to. Max couldn’t lose Chloe.

Not now. Not ever.

 

It was an hour or two into her training session when Chloe came to the junkyard.

Max didn’t know if she was expecting to find Max here, or if she just came on her own to blow off steam. Either way, it saved Max the trouble of finding her.

Chloe had tears in her eyes.

She found Max practicing hitting beer bottles with a baseball. Max would rewind whenever she’d miss or knock them all down.

So far she hadn’t knocked them all down.

“M-max. What are you doing here?”

“Practicing.”

The resolve in Max’s voice, the certainty of her confidence, unbalanced Chloe.

She gave Max a confused look.

“Wh … for what?”

“Saving Rachel.”

Chloe bit her bottom lip.

“You know she’s missing too, then?”

Chloe wiped a tear away from her eye. She hated showing her weakness to anyone, but Max wasn’t going to tease her about it.

Much.

“Yeah. I know where she is, too --- _wha_!”

Max didn’t finish her thought before Chloe bounded _right_ in front of her, grasped her hand, and shot it up.

There was a dangerous, anxious fire in Chloe’s eyes. Chloe was biting her lip so hard she had to have been making it bleed.

Max hadn’t seen this energy from her before. Not quite like this.

She had to look away. She couldn’t handle the pressure of the gaze. It was crushing, choking.

“ **Where**.”

It was just one word. But there was so much in it.

Chloe was almost hyper-ventilating. Her voice wasn’t even. Her nails dug into Max’s wrist.

“Chloe.”

Max tried, but her voice came out weak and unconvincing.

“ **Where**.”

“I’m on _your_ side.”

Max found her voice again. She looked up to give Chloe her hardest look.

Chloe hesitated. Then the cracks started to show.

She groaned loudly, looked up, and released Max’s wrist.

She took a few steps back. Her hands hooked behind her head and she kicked at some dirt. She sniffled.

“I’m sorry, dude. But. This … this isn’t happening.”

Her last few words were breathless and distant.

“It is happening, Chloe. But we’re stopping it.”

Max tossed the baseball up and down.

“Dude how? You didn’t even tell me where she is.”

Chloe looked back to Max. Her eyebrows were raised.

“You can still get access to your step-dad’s guns, right?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“Get one. We’re going to pay Mr. Jefferson a visit.”

Chloe spat at the ground.

“He’s behind all of this? Dude always rubbed me the wrong way.”

“Yeah. Come on.”

Max threw the baseball at one of the beer bottles. It shattered.

Only after it hit the ground, but, still. That counted.

 

They went back to Chloe’s house.

Both of her parents were working right now.

Max waited inside of the truck while Chloe went in and fetched a gun.

Max sighed. She put her head in her hands.

Her life was about to get a lot more complicated.

But if she did this right, then it would be worth it.

Everything would be better.

Chloe and Rachel would get to be together again.

Her life wouldn’t be ruined.

Rachel might even learn to better appreciate the effect she was having on other people.

It still wasn’t fair.

Max didn’t ask for this.

Her life was just going swimmingly, before all of this started. She didn’t need this curveball.

_He would have done this with or without your powers._

The voice in her head chimed in. It was right, of course.

_Only difference is you know him and you know you can stop him. Only you can and still save Rachel._

Max gritted her teeth.

If she thought about it, Max had an opportunity to stop a massive creep. To do a lot of good in the world.

It steeled her resolve.

It wasn’t going to happen like her dream.

Chloe deserved better.

Chloe came back with a six-shot revolver. She did a really stupid joke of pointing it – unloaded – at Max. It wasn’t funny the first time she didn’t, it wasn’t funny this time.

But Chloe was giggling.

“Chill out, Maxipad.”

She was smiling.

Chloe had confidence that Max knew what she was doing.

That was enough to get her through this.

 

Chloe drove them back to campus. She didn’t wear seatbelts because yolo.

Max texted Nathan to find out where he was.

Victoria’s room.

Of course.

He teased her for not guessing.

Max made her way to Victoria’s room with Chloe in tow. Chloe was just about bouncing from step to step.

Victoria answered the door _almost_ immediately after Max knocked.

“Max. Please. You’re being fucking weird.”

Max knew that tone. It was pleading. Victoria was worried. In her own way.

“I know.”

“ _Max._ ”

“Tori.”

Max sighed. She got close to Victoria, wrapped her arms around, and let her hands come to rest gently on the small of Victoria’s back.

She placed dozens of little kisses along Victoria’s neck.

Just like she knew she liked it.

Victoria shivered and squirmed.

“No fair.”

“Plenty fair. I say so.”

They both giggled. Max moved up her face to rub her forehead against Victoria’s – with some effort anyway since height difference was a bitch.

Nathan cleared his throat.

Chloe was grinning like an idiot with her arms crossed.

Victoria was blushing. Max probably was too, if she had any decency.

“Right.”

They separated.

“Did Nathan tell you everything already?”

“Yeah … You’re really going to do this, aren’t you?”

Max nodded.

“I have to.”

Victoria frowned.

“Please be safe, okay? If Nathan is right, Jefferson is an asshole who preys on women just like you. I can’t …”

She sighed severely and closed her eyes. There was a little waver at the end of her sentence that Max really couldn’t focus on right now or she wouldn’t be able to do anything but spend all day comforting her.

“I don’t know what I would do without you, Max.”

“I know.”

Victoria’s eyes went wide.

Max giggled.

“And I love you too and junk and stuff.”

“ _Ugh_ , you’re the worst, sometimes.”

But Victoria was smiling. And so was Nathan.

Max looked to him.

“Where’s Jefferson?”

“He sets up shop in some creepy old fuckin’ barn way the fuck outside of town. My family owns it. We’ll go tonight. That’s when he uses it. He wouldn’t have done much with Rachel yet. That’d all be tonight.”

Max looked to Victoria.

“What’s your job?”

She rolled her eyes.

“I’ll sit outside and uselessly call the police. Keep them on the line.”

“Use _fully_ call the police.”

“Whatever.”

Max looked to Chloe.

“I’m going to shoot the _bejesus_ out of Jefferson.”

Chloe was miming shooting her pistol. Victoria bit her nails.

Max looked to Nathan.

“I’ll deal with his guards.”

Max’s eye brows raised.

Nathan put his hands up.

“Not _that_ way, jeez, give me some credit. They’re all my friends. They’ll listen to me.”

Max nodded.

This sounded like a plan that would work.

The last thing Jefferson would expect is Nathan betraying him. Or a super-powered Max Caulfield.

This would work.

It had to.

 

* * *

 

Nathan drove the barn alone, earlier than everyone else.

Jefferson gave him the details. He’d stand outside and guard with the boys for most of the night.

Then he’d come in and help take pictures.

Tonight, he was supposed to learn how to use the date-rape drug.

Rachel would be his practice for both.

Asshole would probably get more pictures of Nathan doing something to Rachel.

But he had no choice.

Or at least, he didn't, before.

Nathan sighed wearily as he rubbed his hands along the edge of the steering wheel.

Max was some kind of fucking angel to remove this burden from him. For listening to him. For treating him like a decent human being.

He just had to not fuck up his piece.

He looked to the pistol he had, sitting warmly in the passenger seat.

He wouldn’t.

One way or the other.

 

* * *

 

Rachel was drifting in and out of consciousness.

Her resolve was steady.

But Mark was relentless.

“Whores don’t deserve anything you have.”

She could feel herself slipping away with every remark he made. Whenever she’d collect her thoughts to try and push his words away, he had a fresh batch ready for her, and he made sure she heard every single word.

It didn’t help that he’d tug her hair around and manhandle her when she’d so much as blink or try and look away.

She wouldn’t be able to handle the sound of a camera whirring in the same way ever again.

 

* * *

 

Chloe, Max, and Victoria all pulled up in Chloe’s truck after the sun had already set.

There were already a few cars here. One of them looked like Nathan’s. Max didn’t recognize the other two.

Nathan said Jefferson got very absorbed in his shots. He’d get into a trance, almost. They would catch him off-guard. He never noticed Max had woken up in her dream.

Victoria and Max exchanged one last kiss.

Max looked expectantly at Victoria and Chloe until they got the clue and hugged.

They were still uneasy friends, but Max wouldn’t have it any other way. They had something of a rivalry going on and so long as it remained pleasant, Max found it endearing.

Chloe loaded her gun. Her excited jittering had turned more anxious and nervous. This was becoming real.

Chloe and Max got out of the truck. Victoria dialed 9-1-1.

“Hello? Yes, I’d like to report an emergency …”

Nathan was right. The barn was fuckin’ creepy. It looked like it hadn’t been maintained in centuries. It was in the middle of a forest, several miles away from civilization. That’s why Victoria had to call the police _now_ , so they could get here in time.

If her nightmare was predictive, then Rachel wouldn’t live through a police intervention. But if everything failed, they’d at least stop him.

Several slants of wood along the barn’s edges were uneven, frayed, and missing. The paint had worn unevenly, and was almost gone entirely. All of the exterior lamps had broken several years ago and were non-functioning.

But there was a dim light coming from within side the barn. Max could see it. She could hear activity and voices from within.

The front of the barn was barred. It was about the only thing on it that looked modern. Some kind of steel contraption. It wasn’t going to be opening easily.

Nathan said there’d be a door on the left-hand side.

There was.

It looked new, too.

Chloe pulled out her gun. Her hand was shaking.

“We go in on one.”

Max nodded.

“Three.”

Max clenched her fists.

“Two.”

Chloe cracked her neck.

“One.”

Chloe opened the door and rushed inside. Max followed right behind her.

The sight of a gun barrel being immediately pointed at her made time feel like it was stopping.

It didn't, really. It was just a stalemate. 

There were two men in front of them. Max recognized them casually as coming from Blackwell, but no names came to her.

Chloe's gun was raised.

Their guns were raised.

No one wanted to shoot first.

No one wanted to die.

Max could hear the severity of Chloe’s breathing. The stress she was carrying.

Max couldn't help but notice how the lights in here danced around from the ancient lamps.

They illuminated the decrepit machinery in here in some fascinating ways.

In another context, it would be a good place to take some pictures.

“Let them through.”

Max knew that voice. It brought her back to reality.

“Wha ---“

One of the men turned his face to look in the direction of Nathan’s voice.

Nathan moved to stand behind them. His gun was out. Pointing at the two men.

“Nate?! What are you doing?”

“Something I should have done a long fuckin’ time ago. Let. Them. _Through_...”

One of the men shook his head. The other looked scandalized.

“Aw, for fuck’s sake, Nate…”

They both groaned and dropped their weapons, putting their hands up high.

Chloe was elated.

She punched the sky.

“Score. You’re awesome.”

With a skip in her step, she bounced over and picked up one of the guns. She rapidly pulled on the slide until all of the rounds had been safely ejected.

She did this, right in front of the man whose gun it was, with a stupid smug grin on her face.

She wore his sneer proudly.

She then tossed it away. She put the second gun in her waist line.

“Max. Earth to Max. Come on.”

Chloe bounced back over to shake Max’s shoulder excitedly.

Max nodded.

They walked over to Nathan. Like Chloe, he was shaking and full of anxious energy.

It'd be more surprising if he wasn't, actually.

It wasn’t every day you planned the murder of a vicious creep.

Max smiled.

“Thanks, Nate, for everything.”

He looked away, at the ground somewhere. He couldn’t meet her gaze. But he was smiling.

“Yeah.”

Max didn’t settle for this. She got right next to him and hugged him in the harsh, compressing way she did when she wanted him to know everything was alright.

She had to do it from the side, since his gun was still up, but she was still able to circumnavigate most of his body with her arms and she knew the squeezing would feel reassuring.

He sighed.

He could close his eyes for a moment and just forget about the world.

“Thanks for doing this. See you on the other side.”

His voice sounded distant, but unusually calm, Max realized.

Max didn’t know that Nathan’s conscience was finally clear after months of agony and quiet suffering.

He could change.

He did change.

Jefferson was fuckin’ wrong.

 

Nathan cleared his throat and nodded back towards a large hole in the barn’s floor.

Unlike the rest of the barn, the metallic stairs that lead underground were modern. High-tech, in fact. This had to have cost some serious money.

There was an even more serious-costing door blocking their access. It had a keypad off to the side.

“Fuck.”

Chloe pouted and crossed her arms.

“Think I can shoot it off? Those hinges look pretty weak.”

They didn’t.

Max rolled her eyes.

“I got this.”

Nathan had told Max the door combination earlier. Max made her way over to it to enter it in.

The door opened, but it was loud. Way too loud. Everyone on the premises would have heard it with how loud it was.

Max recognized this noise. The one from her dream.

Nathan should have known about this.

Jefferson would have to have known they were coming.

 

_No._

 

Chloe raced along forward anyway.

 

_No._

 

Max muttered under her breath and followed her.

 

Chloe really needed to control herself. This was exactly just how ---

 

Max’s heart stopped when she heard a violent bang.

 

Chloe’s eyes were wide. So were Max’s.

 

The shot was perfect. Right in the side of Chloe’s head.

 

Chloe crumpled onto the floor lifelessly.

 

Max fell onto her knees.

 

She couldn’t force her body to move or her brain to think of what to do.

 

This couldn’t get any worse.

 

She had failed.

 

She lost Chloe.

 

It was overwhelming.

 

Then she heard a hoarse, guttural, primal cry. It turned into a scream, then petered off into broken, unsteady sobbing.

“NO!”

She knew it was Rachel.

“She knew that was going to happen! She came anyway! You said you told her to stay the fuck away! Ugh! What is _WRONG_ with you?”

She knew Jefferson had just made Rachel watch as he killed Chloe. And he didn’t sound happy about it.

Fucking …

This was too much.

Max just needed to rest here for a moment.

She just needed to close her eyes.

She could gather her thoughts and figure out what to do.

What her plan would be to fix this.

She'd need a plan to tell Chloe when she rewound to keep her steady.

She just needed… to close her eyes.

 

“Max. Why’d you have to listen to that worthless punk? Why didn’t you listen to Rachel?”

She opened her eyes with a gasp.

Jefferson was standing right above Max. His pistol was inches away from her head.

Max had been spacing for too long again.

At least a minute had passed. Probably a few.

She’d only rewound a couple seconds at time, before.

“Rachel told me all about the plan. Did you honestly think you could out smart me? I’m a fucking genius.”

This was too much.

She couldn’t do this.

Max covered her face with her hands.

She felt like she was going to collapse.

She failed.

Chloe was dead.

Rachel would be dead soon.

Probably Max as well.

Her life was over.

The world was over.

It was all her fault.

Max could feel the tip of the gun press against her forehead.

She breathed in deep. It was uneven.

He hesitated.

“Max …”

Max was overwhelmed with a memory.

 

* * *

 

Max was back in her room, in Seattle. It looked pretty much the same as her dorm did, but it was roomier and it had more period pieces in it.

She was crying despondently, and she knew why.

No one at her new school liked her.

They made fun of her clothes. The way she spaced out. The way she could never finish sentences without stammering or looking away. Her general social awkwardness.

Everything sucked. Seattle was terrible.

She heard a knock on her door.

“Sweetie, Victoria wants to play.”

Max breathed through her mouth and swallowed. She tried to sound like she wasn’t crying.

“O-okay, mom. Can you let her in?”

“Sure thing, honey.”

Max placed her hands in her head. She slouched forward.

Victoria quietly opened Max’s door, and closed it behind her.

She was still for a few moments.

“Max.”

Max couldn’t look up. She couldn’t let Victoria see her like this. At least, not her face. It’d only make her pity Max even more.

Victoria was everything Max wasn’t. Popular. Well-dressed. Successful.

Victoria was Max’s only friend here, and Max knew very well that this was entirely out of pity.

Max had stormed out of one of her classes after being bullied. Victoria had found her afterwards crying uselessly in the girl’s bathroom and insisted they exchange numbers.

That was about a week ago.

Victoria sighed and came to sat down on the bed next to her.

“Max. Please. What’s wrong? You haven’t answered your phone all day long.”

Max sniffled. She peeled her face away from her hands, but didn’t look at Victoria.

“N-no one likes me. I’m a total loser. Why did I even come to here? Why did my parents fo ---“

Max tried to continue, but Victoria came and placed a finger on her lips.

“Shh. Max. _Here_.”

Victoria shifted down the bed. She brought her hands on Max’s shoulders.

“Lay down, please.”

Max allowed herself to be guided by Victoria’s firm hands. She ended up with her head face-up in Victoria’s lap, with nowhere to look but at her.

She felt tense and jittery. Her whole world was blurry, she shook her head and raised her hands up ---

But Victoria placed her hands in Max’s hair. She ran her fingers through it, slowly, gently, carefully. Affectionately.

Max melted. Her arms collapsed by her sides. She looked up to Victoria with pleading, tearful eyes. It took her a while to form words.

“W-what, Victoria? What do you want out of me?”

Max knew the pity party would end, eventually. She just didn’t know when.

“You’re not a loser, Max. You just don’t know how to express yourself yet.”

Max bit her lip.

_What does that mean?_

“For example… if you don’t care about how you look in public, people will notice, and assume things. We’re going shopping tomorrow. I’m personally picking you out two-week’s worth of clothes.”

“I can’t aff—“

“I’m buying.”

Max’s breath hitched.

“You have such a beautiful way of seeing things, Max. When you’re around with me, you’re so kind, and gentle, and warm. I’ve never seen pictures like yours before. We just need to show everyone else who you really are.”

“H-how?”

Victoria closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. Victoria never tripped over her words. It was like she was always reading from a script.

“Sometimes you really just need to focus, Max. Sometimes it feels like you’re a million miles away, so deep in your own thoughts that no one can reach you.”

Victoria opened her eyes to look down at Max directly.

“Let me tell you something my dad always used to tell me. Whenever you start feeling your thoughts cascading out of control, I want you to breathe in deep. Focus. Concentrate on what you’re about to say, so you don’t end up stuttering or stammering. When you have your next sentence ready to go, then puff out your chest. Say it loudly so that everyone can hear it. Just do it.”

She smiled.

“And my addendum --- Fuck your insecurities. You can change the world if you believe in yourself, Max.”

Max considered Victoria’s words for a long time, just allowing herself to be pet in the alarmingly comfortable position.

“D-do you really think that? That I can change the world if I try?”

Victoria nodded.

“C-can I hold your hand?”

Victoria nodded after some delay. One of her hands came away from Max’s hair to grab at her hand. It was awkward at first, but she managed to figure out how to get them to interlock from this position eventually.

Max would never forget the way Victoria’s thumb gently paced back and forth on Max’s hand as she talked.

“We’ll buy some clothes tonight. Not the whole shebang, but enough to get you through tomorrow. Then, you’re staying with me the entire day, got it? You’ll practice until you can do it. You’ll walk and feel like you own the school before you know it.”

“O-okay. B-but …”

Max trailed off. She closed her eyes.

“Can we just sit here for a while?”

“If you want to.”

Max smiled.

She did.

Max stopped sobbing. She could change the world if she just believed in herself. Victoria was going to show her how.

 

* * *

 

Max could change the world if she believed in herself.

“Max.”

Jefferson sounded quieter now. He lowered his gun. Was this his fucked-up idea of sympathy? She probably looked pretty pathetic right now. But there was a fire burning inside of her now.

“Join me. Help me take pictures of Rachel. You do have a marvelous eye … you just have some hormones that you can’t quite control. I will be able to fix that. Trust me.”

She shuddered. _Fix her_. Like she was a robot.

 

 _No_.

 

She pulled her hands away from her face.

She stood up.

Her body ached. She didn’t care.

The fire burned brighter.

“Max …?”

His voice had a dangerous edge to it.

Max raised her hand.

 

 _No_.

 

Not like this.

She had to do this.

She had to change the world.

She would fix this.

Time started to reverse itself.

Jefferson moved away.

Max steadied her breathing.

She had to walk back to where she was before.

She saw Chloe rise up and run in reverse back into their position, in slow motion. It would have been funny in literally any other context, though Chloe’s expression was heartbreaking and Max couldn’t look at it.

Max had difficulty concentrating. Her head felt like it was splitting in two. The whispers of the world were deafening. All of the voices weren’t talking _to_ her so much as _at_ her, like a wall of sound, trying to overwhelm her.

She started to walk back towards her position before Chloe had raced off ahead. She couldn’t let Chloe see her teleport around. It’d be too much to explain in too little time. A conversation had right in the bunker would certainly ruin any plan Max could come up with to deal with Jefferson.

Every step felt like she was fighting against an impossibly powerful current, trying to push her body back to where she was before she started the reversal. The farther she got away from her anchor point, the more the waves violently cascaded against her.

A particularly forceful wave crashed against her. She lost her balance and had to steady herself against a wall.

But she didn’t practice for no reason.

 

And she knew what she had to do.

 

She closed her eyes.

 

She thought to every time Chloe and Rachel were together.

 

She pushed off of the wall and took a step.

 

She was hunched over and holding herself with an arm, but she was moving.

 

The fire kept on burning.

 

She thought about how happy Chloe was whenever she’d gush about whatever inconsequential things Rachel did that day.

 

Rachel could do literally nothing but smoke pot and hang out and Chloe would still find an impressive amount to gush over.

 

It was so adorable.

 

She took more steps.

 

Her legs felt like they were going to fall off.

 

She thought about the way Chloe got bashful whenever Rachel teased her.

 

Chloe never got bashful like that when Max teased her.

 

She kept going.

 

She thought about the ring Chloe showed her on the car ride here.

 

How Chloe couldn’t even talk about it without getting all choked up.

 

How Max got choked up when she found a matching one in her own pocket.

 

She knew what Rachel had done, then.

 

Always thinking a few steps ahead.

 

Max smiled.

 

Max made it back to her spot, and lowered her hand.

The voices stopped.

Her head ache didn’t.

She was able to stand up straight, at least.

Her breathing was still severe.

Chloe recognized she was different. She hesitated.

Max had to shove away the part of her that was overwhelmed with joy that Chloe was alive again, that Max hadn’t failed, that she didn’t lose anyone else.

She had a plan now, and she needed to get Chloe to listen.

“Um. Dude. You’re… you’ve got red on you.”

“Huh …?”

Max’s voice sounded weaker than she expected.

She raised a hand to wipe away at her nose.

Blood. Max’s vision blurred a little bit.

That’s not good.

She didn’t care.

She had to focus.

The fire burned a little bit more of her.

“Chloe, never mind me. Just stop for like five seconds.”

Chloe’s expression changed to shock, then confusion.

“Why, the door’s open, he won’t know, it ---“

“ _Chloe_.”

Max’s voice faltered. Chloe _needed_ to listen to her right now. Max couldn’t handle it if she saw Chloe die again.

“I … _Rachel_ …”

“Chloe. Please.”

Chloe sighed. She lowered her gun, and raised her head up with her eyes closed.

“Alright. Just tell me what to do. You’re the leader here, Mad Max.”

Max felt woozy.

She wasn’t going to last much longer. That was too much rewinding at once.

She couldn’t steady her breathing. She was hyperventilating. She was going to pass out.

 

 _No_.

 

She knew she was pushing herself too hard.

The aching in her head was unbearable.

The thought of Chloe charging off and dying was on constant replay in her head. It was paralyzing.

The edges of her world were blurred and darkened.

But she knew what she had to do. She couldn’t stop now.

Max could change the world if she just believed in herself.

She breathed in deeply, and puffed her chest out.

And she believed in herself. Her plan would work. Chloe would listen. Jefferson would believe. Rachel would be saved.

“I’m going to walk in, alone. Jefferson won’t expect me. He’ll be caught off-guard. He ... he wants me to help him. I’ll act like I will.”

The strength in her voice was back. Chloe’s eyes were wide.

“I want you to hide …”

Max turned towards the open door and pointed at a wall demarking the threshold between the entrance and the bunker’s interior proper. Mr. Jefferson was on the other side of the wall.

“Right there. When I say ‘Chloe’, you’ll pop out and… deal with him.”

The color had left Chloe’s face. She looked nervous.

Chloe hesitated.

“Are you sure, Max? If you die right here, right now, I’ll …”

Chloe gulped.

“I will never forgive myself.”

Max nodded.

“I have never been more sure of anything in my life. Just be ready.”

The ache in her body be damned.

 

Max made her way into the bunker.

Chloe followed behind her.

They timed their steps together so it sounded like one person coming.

Chloe immediately pressed her back against the wall that Max had instructed her to.

Max closed her eyes.

She thought of Victoria.

She turned around the corner.

She opened them again.

Jefferson was by the far end of the room. He had his arm extended with a pistol in his hand. There was a camera pointing towards Rachel, and one pointed towards Max.

Max could go her whole life without having a loaded gun pointed to her again.

But Rachel was still alive. She was duct-taped to a chair right in front of him. Her hair was frizzled. Her make-up was running. But she was alive.

Jefferson had a harsh look on his face. It was all contorted into a pained grimace. He was sweating, visibly, and only had on a dress shirt without his usual blazer. His finger was twitching on the trigger.

Maybe it unsettled him that he was just about to shoot Chloe.

Good.

“Max?!”

Both Jefferson and Rachel said in unison.

“Max, what are you doing … I told you not to come.”

“Yes, Max, what _are_ you doing? Not about to do something incredibly stupid, I hope!”

Rachel’s voice sounded desperate. Jefferson’s was higher-pitched, tense, and jittery. It was the fastest she’d ever heard him talk.

She had actually only spent the afternoon practicing using her powers. The morning, she spent practicing lying to herself in the mirror. Victoria actually encouraged it, since “any girlfriend of mine needs to be able to swerve.”

She had practiced something she thought would appeal to Mr. Jefferson.

Then, she had no idea if it would work. It was a back-up plan in case she got captured, just like in her dream. Only her words could help her there.

Now, she knew it would work. She had seen herself a few minutes ago Jefferson’s insane ego. She knew he wanted her help. She knew from the dream he saw something in her that he didn’t see in Rachel or Chloe.

He would believe her.

“I had to see it for myself.”

Max said softly. She started to look around the bunker, but she wasn’t actually paying attention to what her eyes were pointed at. She kept looking at Rachel and Jefferson through her peripheral vision.

Max couldn’t keep pushing herself like this. She couldn’t do another few minutes of rewinding. The fire would consume her entirely. This was her only chance.

“Nathan told me about your amazing studio, Mr. Jefferson. He sounded so impressed. I just had to see… I begged him to let me in.”

Rachel’s eyes went wide.

Mr. Jefferson lowered his gun. He wore a shocked expression openly for a few seconds before he cleared his throat.

His voice evened out.

“Is that so?”

Max nodded.

“Yeah. It’s… beautiful. I’m so impressed. Can you show me how you take your shots? Mine always come out awful, and terrible. Nothing like yours. Yours are breath-taking.”

Max bit her lip. What did Nathan always said he muttered?

“I wish I could be as pretty as your subjects are …”

Jefferson exhaled an unsteady breath, then cracked his neck and grinned.

“I think that be arranged, Max.”

His voice sounded like the teacher she knew, and not the monster she saw.

Jefferson started to walk towards her. He tucked his gun into his waist line.

Max’s heart was going a million miles an hour. This was working. She was doing it. She was going to save Rachel.

She closed her eyes.

Max thought of the way Victoria giggled when Max kissed all along her neck. She thought of how much Victoria really believed in her.

She could change the world. She _was_ changing the world.

When Jefferson’s hand came up to caress Max’s check, Max opened her eyes.

“Just tell me one thing, Mr. Jefferson?”

“What is it, Max?”

“What do you think of **Chloe Price**?”

Max said the last two words at a near shout.

His eyes went wide.

 

For the second time tonight, Max heard the loud bang of a gun going off.

 

She flinched. She hoped she’d never get used to that sound.

 

Jefferson’s eyes rolled into the back of his head. He slumped over.

 

Chloe was shaking. Her gun was smoking.

 

She shot it again.

 

And again.

 

And again.

 

And again.

 

And again.

 

And she tried again, but the gun clicked uselessly instead.

 

It didn’t stop her from trying several more times.

Chloe was sobbing uncontrollably.

Max’s fire wasn’t going to allow her to break down like that. Not right now, anyway. Adrenaline was a hell of a drug. Some shock probably helped, too.

Max looked away from Chloe, back to Rachel.

Rachel was looking down at the ground. She sighed.

“Max …”

Rachel’s voice was distant and despondent.

“Rachel.”

Max’s was harsh and hoarse.

“You shouldn’t be here.”

Max made her way over Jefferson’s body. She didn’t look at it. She didn’t want to remember it later.

Chloe was still trying to shoot Jefferson some more with a gun that had nothing left to give.

“Max, I told you. My fate is ---“

“What if my fate is rescuing you from Jefferson?!”

Rachel flinched.

Max’s voice came out too loud. Too uneven. The fire was seeping into it. It just wasn’t fair. Rachel was _complaining_ _about being rescued from death_ because of her conceptions about her fate.

“What if your fate was just to get captured so I’d learn some … _bullshit_ lesson about how to use my powers? Why is your fate _dying_ , Rachel?”

If this was misusing her powers, then let them be taken from her. She couldn’t stand to see Chloe fucked-up from this for one more second. She couldn’t stand to think of what Jefferson would do to Rachel.

Or what he’d do to her, or anyone else, later.

Fuck anything that these powers would bring her.

She just wanted her friends back.

Chloe deserved better.

Rachel deserved better.

Max was shaking. The fire inside of her was burning away her ability to stay calm. The stress of the situation and the exertion she was placing on her body was taking its toll.

Rachel was quiet for a long time.

“I don’t know. I… I-I only had vagueness to go off of, I just …”

Rachel’s voice was quiet and thoughtful.

Max swallowed something that she hoped wasn’t blood and tried to calm herself down. She knew exactly how much tapping into her anger was going to burn her out later, and Rachel really didn’t need Max’s anger right now.

She counted down from 20.

Her hands were shaking less.

“Can we just… try? Just see if I’m right?”

Rachel smiled gently.

“I guess you’ve earned that, Max.”

Max kicked the cameras over while she made her way to Rachel. The more expensive they were, the better.

Rachel was still taped to the chair. Somehow, Max had totally forgot about that part of her dream. She needed a way to cut her free.

There was a scalpel on a medical table nearby.

Max pointedly ignored what it would be used for in this context and instead used it to reverse the damage it would otherwise do.

To cut Rachel free.

Rachel got up. She was a little wobbly, but she still hugged Max as firmly as she could.

“Max … thanks.”

Max smiled weakly.

Rachel looked around at what Max’s plan had achieved. She rubbed at her own wrists.

“You’re a real badass now, you know that?”

Max thought about protesting, since she was habitually awful at taking compliments. She found a way to accept it obliquely.

“Whenever I’d get down, someone always told me I could change the world if I believed in myself. I never thought …”

Rachel smiled knowingly. There was a certain twinkle in her eye.

Max smiled a bit wider.

Max looked back towards the exit, and Chloe.

“We still have to find out if I’m right. Um. How do we go about doing that?”

Rachel hummed thoughtfully.

“We’ll mediate in the forest tomorrow, together. We’ll see if your theory is right then.”

Max didn’t know what that meant, but Rachel sounded like she knew what she was doing.

Max tried to ignore the shiver in Rachel’s body as they both walked back towards the exit.

 

Chloe only finally stopped trying to shoot Jefferson for the 9 thousandth time when she saw Rachel. She dropped the gun.

“Rachel.”

“Chloe.”

They embraced. She could see Chloe immediately start hugging _too tight_ and she could see her nails making indents in the fabric.

Max smiled again.

“If you-ever-do-that to me-again I’m so-killing you. Like really kill. Like-super definitely- _hyper_ murder you.”

Chloe was trying to sound tough and composed, but Max could see her eyes were welded shut and she could hear the waver in her voice. She spoke too quickly. She was still crying from earlier. Chloe was broken.

But she would be okay.

“I don’t think we’ll have to worry about that again.”

Rachel’s voice was calm and even, and quiet, like it was only meant for Chloe’s ears.

Chloe breathed in deep. She rested her head against Rachel’s.

“Good.”

Chloe lost what composure she had left and buried her head in Rachel’s shoulder. She just needed a moment to cry.

Max was okay with giving her that.

 

She looked around, still ignoring the crumpled body on the floor.

This place looked really nice, despite it all. It was a really good studio. Max could recognize several high-brand cameras and absurdly expensive lenses stashed around the place. There was a pleasant leather couch in the middle. A love bed on the far end. Shaped like a fucking heart. A chair, of course. Several lockers. A computer terminal. Tons of posters of Jefferson’s work. The walls and ceiling felt too sterile. It was suffocating.

It had to have cost a small fortune to build. There’s no way Jefferson had the money for something like this. And what did Nathan say? That it was on Prescott family property?

Something about the whole thing just didn’t sit right. There were numbers not adding up.

Maybe it didn’t matter. Jefferson was dead. _Hyper-_ dead.

Max cleared her throat. She suddenly felt very dirty. How could she feel anything but disgust at this place? Jefferson was a monster. The sins of this place could never be washed away. She couldn’t stay.

“Let’s uh. Get out of here.”

“Yeah.”

Chloe’s voice sounded better, now. Drained, for sure, but she wasn’t crying anymore.

Chloe reached down and picked up her discarded gun. She wasn’t nervously excited, or anxious. Her movements were calm and collected, just like Rachel’s.

Chloe and Rachel wrapped an arm around each other’s shoulder as they walked up the stairs together.

Max followed right behind them.

 

When they got up to the barn again, there were police in blue uniforms everywhere. They quickly took Chloe’s guns.  

She protested, but it died when Rachel pinched her ribs. Now was not the time to be resisting uniformed police offers.

Several officers forced their way past Max, back into the bunker. They had on bullet-proof vests and more tactical gear.

Max could have used some of that.

_Focus, Max._

Nathan and his friends were on their knees. Their hands were secured behind their backs.

“Maxine Caulfield.”

Max felt a shiver go down her spine. That voice she didn’t know. Why did everyone have to use her full name?

She turned to face the front of the barn. The police had gotten the front door open and the light coming from outside was positively blinding.

She raised a hand to shield her eyes.

An older gentleman was standing about center of the barn with his hands behind his back, crossed there. His posture was tall. Straight. Confident.

His suit looked more expensive than Max’s college tuition.

Next to him was another police officer. She had several stars on her collar and a stripe going down the side of her uniform. Max intuited this person was in charge of the police here.

The older man took a few steps closer to her. Chloe and Rachel were escorted away from her, outside maybe.

She gulped.

“Do I know you?”

“Everyone knows me. I am Sean Prescott.”

Now that he was closer, Max could make out more details. There was a little bit of gray in his hair about his sides. Like Nathan, his hair was brown and styled immaculately.

If Nathan was a robot that wasn’t assembled right, Sean was an android with all of the pieces well-oiled and made of the highest quality to work exactly so.

His glasses were tinted, even though it was late at night, and it didn’t allow Max to get a really good bead on his eyes.

He smiled.

“You’re the reason my boy’s been staying out trouble, aren’t you? You’re the reason he finally stood up to me.”

Max gulped again. This could go very wrong very quickly.

She could probably rewind a few seconds of conversation if she needed to. Her head still felt _awful_ but this was important.

“Yeah. I think so. Nathan just needs some good friends.”

Sean nodded and smiled wider.

“That he does.”

He then flattened his expression.

“Consider what I am about to do here. I am about to discharge your friend from murder or manslaughter charges for Jefferson, and whatever accessory charges you’d carry. This whole dreadful place will be demolished and destroyed. You and all of your friends will go back to school like nothing happened.”

He paused.

“This is what we call quid pro quo. You should keep this in mind in the future when you deal with the Prescott family.”

He removed one of his hands from behind his back and extended it.

“All I ask is that you forget about all of this. Never talk to _anyone_ about what you saw here. This will be our little secret.”

Max blinked. Was going to try and cover up something with this many officers involved …?

And ... how did he know what they did with Mr. Jefferson? The other police officers were still going down to investigate.

There was no way he would have already gotten a report from them. The other officer near by even had a radio on her shoulder and hadn't heard anything.

Max had to know.

"How ... how do you know what happened to Mr. Jefferson?"

He frowned.

He then closed his eyes, sighed, and slowly lowered his hand.

"Couldn't just go along with it ..."

He spat at the ground, and turned to the officer near him.

"Take them away."

Max's eyes widened.

 

 _No_.

 

That wasn't right.

She raised her hand. 

Time started to reverse itself.

She was immediately rebuked with even worse agony. She was seeding deep aches in her body now. 

But it was only a few seconds. It was over almost as quickly as it started.

Sean was back to looking at her expectantly. His hand was still extended.

Max was so conflicted.

Sean clearly knew something about the whole thing, him even being here was suspicious as fuck.

There was something he wasn't telling her.

But what choices did she really have? He was right, after all. Chloe's actions were likely considered murder.

He was going to remove everything, likely any evidence that associated him with whatever was going on here.

But what good would that evidence do if the local police was working with him, anyway?

Could Max sacrifice the well-being of herself and her friends to object morally to what was going on here?

She felt a pulse of agony from the back of her head.

She needed to rest.

Sean would have his way. For now.

This might come back to haunt her later, but she just wanted her life back.

 

“Okay.”

 

She reached out and shook his hand.

His grasp was too firm.

Her hand hurt when they broke contact.

“Good. Take your friends and leave. We will handle the clean-up.”

This deal didn’t rub Max the right way. Nothing about Sean did. Nothing about this whole place did, or Jefferson’s connections to it.

But if she was honest, forgetting about this place and Mr. Jefferson could really only be a good thing for her.

She just wanted her life back. Sean offered her just that.

Sean smiled, turned back to the officer next to him, and had a pleasant conversation not meant for Max’s ears.

Apparently Nathan wasn’t kidding when he said his dad owned the police.

Max’s brain was starting to shut down from the stress and agony. Adrenaline and shock could only get her so far. The fire inside of her had consumed a lot and she had pushed herself too hard.

 She made her way outside numbly, trying not to wear the questioning looks of the police officers too heavily.

 

Outside, Nathan, his friends, Chloe, Rachel, and Victoria, were all standing around the cars.

Victoria immediately came over to hug Max. She was crying.

Max patted at her back. She’d probably be crying too in a few minutes. If her eyes had any tears to offer her, anyway.

“Max. You were amazing. Chloe told me everything. I was so worried.”

“Max is a super hero now.”

Rachel chimed in. She gave Max a stupid wave. Chloe did her best superman impression while still being on the ground.

Max smiled.

“Hi.”

Victoria groaned.

“Hi, you nerd.”

They put their heads together, and both of them closed their eyes tightly.

Max could almost fall asleep like this. Victoria was so warm. Max was so cold.

Nathan interrupted.

“Hey uh. I don’t know about y’all but I want to jet. Blow this fucking place.”

Nathan was shifting uncomfortably.

Victoria hesitated, but pulled away from Max and nodded.

“’Yeah Nathan, super good idea Nathan’, says no one.”

His own derisive tone was only mocking himself. He was just anxious that this was all finally over.

_It’s over._

He grumbled as he got into the driver’s seat of his own car.

Chloe and Rachel got into their truck.

Nathan’s friends had their own car.

Victoria and Max climbed into the back set of Nathan’s car. Max almost fell asleep the second she hit the leather of the seat.

Instead, she leaned down and rested her head in Victoria’s lap.

_It’s over._

“’m very sleepy ‘Tori. Please pet me.”

“I think I can do that.”

Nathan groaned.

“I am _not_ washing out anything that goes on back there.”

Max giggled tiredly.

Victoria just rolled her eyes and raked her fingers through Max’s hair.

All of the storms on Max’s horizon were clear.

This pain in her head could go away.

She fell asleep.

And hoped for no more nightmares.

_It’s over._

 

* * *

 

Max wasn’t really sure what day it was when Victoria started to shake her gently.

Can’t a woman get some beauty rest?

“Come on, nerd. Rachel wants to see you. She says it’s important.”

_Oh._

They made an arrangement. Victoria would take them to the junkyard in the morning. Chloe would pick them up later.

Max was quiet the entire ride.

She still had work to do. Unlike what Rachel thought, it wasn’t with Fate. There was still one thread she had to tie up in her social circle.

Rachel’s willingness to just let everything – including Chloe – go.

Max still had a headache. It wasn’t as bad as the time in the bunker, but it kept her pensive. There were deep aches in her body that would take days of sleeping to purge.

Just as well, Rachel seemed different after the incident with Jefferson. That smile came with more difficulty. She was quieter.

Maybe Max was over-thinking it. Rachel was allowed to be lost in thought every once in a while, too.

Max didn’t blame her, either way.

Max kissed Victoria goodbye as she got out of the car with Rachel.

The walk through the junkyard was also pretty quiet.

It wasn’t all that long ago she was back here, practicing for taking on the end of her world.

Even longer ago, playing pirates with Chloe. This was no place for kids. Chloe was not an ordinary kid.

 

When they entered into the forest, Max froze. She was awestruck by the endless expanse out in front of her. It looked like it went on for miles and miles.

Rachel smiled, but just tugged her along by her arm anyway.

As they walked deeper into the forest, the sounds of the world slowly faded away. It was difficult to really appreciate the ambient noise pollution cars and machinery created until you were separated from it.

For a while, all Max could hear was their feet compressing the foliage underneath them with every step.

Rachel eventually came to a stop. There were a few felled logs, a camp fire, and a few sleeping bags.

She gingerly walked over to sit down on one of the logs.

Max sat down next to her.

She breathed out.

“So.”

“Yeah.”

Rachel bit her lip.

“Max. I don’t…”

Max wasn’t sure she had ever seen Rachel speechless.

“Rachel. We need to … we can’t do missions. Not in college.”

Rachel’s mouth went wider.

“Max, my f---“

Max had heard enough of that line for several life times. Timelines. Whatever.

“ _Rachel_. Following your fate almost left you with a widowed wife before you even got married.”

Rachel flinched. She looked away, off into the distance.

Rachel’s pensive, exhausted gaze immediately made Max reach for her camera and take a picture.

Victoria insisted she starting shooting on a _D_ SLR. Victoria got her one. Said she had bought one a year or so ago as a birthday present, but could never find the will to send it. Max only had one short lens with it, but she could _already_ hear Victoria prattling on, “the nifty fifty is all you’ll need for a while, anyway.”

Max didn’t want to shoot on digital. She really liked the feel of polaroid prints. They compromised. Max would shoot on digital, and get fancy analog prints of any pictures she liked. Victoria didn’t tell her that’s usually how it worked, anyway, since Max thought she came out of this ahead and it was adorable.

Max liked the way the picture came out on the camera’s display.

Rachel, sitting on the log. The weight of the world on her shoulders. Her hands folded together near her chest, just below her chin. Just a little bit of her hair coming down to obscure the side of her face. The faintest hints of color coming out from her bright, feathered earrings. The distance in her eyes. That look of deep concentration.

And the infinite expanse of the forest, behind her, surrounding her. The gentle smoldering smoke of the fire pit nearby. The delicately hanging fog off in the distance. The background was blurred just enough to immediately draw attention to Rachel, but not enough so that it was meaningless bokeh.

Max liked her pictures more often these days.

She put her camera away and collected her thoughts. She kicked at some leaves since what else do you do with leaves anyway.

 

“I just … Can’t we live our lives without the time bullshit? I think Chloe deserves a wife who will be there for her.”

Rachel didn’t say anything. Max kept thinking.

Max occasionally paused for a few minutes as she continued talking to Rachel. This was as much venting and thinking aloud as it was a conscious effort to get Rachel to see things her way.

“You know; I’ve never seen Chloe quite so happy as when she talks about you.”

Rachel kept quiet, but Max could see a smile there. Max smiled as well.

Max looked away, towards the infinite trees.

It didn’t really matter what direction she looked in, it was all pretty much the same for miles.

Pause.

“Lord knows Victoria would have been worse off without me, and I, without her. That’s why I want to just chill with the freaky time-bending stuff. It’s so stressful and dangerous.”

She exhaled deeply.

Pause.

“I … I saw Chloe die. It was … I don’t have the words to describe the feeling of her dying and then popping right back up and talking to me like nothing happened. I don’t know if I can handle that kind of thing happening more often.”

Max hesitated.

“Do I even want to be able to handle it? What would that even say about me? That I’m so disconnected from reality because of these bullshit powers I can just watch someone die and feel nothing, since I know the powers will fix everything? That’s so _fucked_.”

Rachel’s look dampened a bit. Max wondered how often she had seen Chloe, or someone else she cared for, die. All in the name of Fate.

Pause.

“And when we … _if_ , we, start doing anything with fate again, they deserve to know the truth.”

Rachel bit her lip. Max wasn’t in any rush to try and explain this all to Victoria. Max wasn’t in any rush to start using her powers again, either.

Pause.

Max had a shaky laugh.

“Mr. Jefferson - of all people - actually said something interesting to me when I started talking to him, early on. He was particular to a John Lennon quote. ‘Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.’”

Pause.

“How much of Chloe’s life have you already missed trying to be this superhero? You’ve known each other for what, two-three years now? Do you guys even have a honeymoon planned yet?”

Rachel looked up to the sky.

Pause.

Rachel stood up. She started to slowly walk back in the direction she came.

Max thought, anyway. It all looked the same to her.

Max got up and started after her.

“Where are you going? I thought you wanted to mediate here.”

Rachel nodded.

“To listen for Fate. But I think… I think it doesn’t really matter right now. Whether or not I completed my mission. Whether or not you did. M-ma … Jefferson, is dead. I have a new wife. Those are the important things in my life, now.”

Max smiled and caught up.

Rachel turned around.

Rachel mentioning her wife reminded Max of something.

Max fished Rachel's ring out of her pocket and gave it back to her.

She heard Rachel's breathing hitch.

Rachel's hands were shaking as put the ring back on.

She then launched forward and hugged Max tightly.

In the way too tight, severe manner that Max knew Chloe liked them.

Only Rachel was taller and stronger, so this was an even worse experience.

“Max, Thanks. For … for everything. I … I don’t know …”

But Rachel needed this. In a way, so did Max.

There were definitely tears there somewhere.

Rachel's breathing wasn't steady for minutes.

It lasted too long.

 

But it was nice.

After Rachel slowly detached, they started walking back again.

“Double date for breakfast?”

Max wanted to put all of this stuff out of her mind sooner rather than later.

Rachel smiled and tried to steady her voice.

“ _Duh._ ”

 

They didn’t listen for Fate. If Rachel did hear anything, it was drowned out by the boisterous laughing at their table as Chloe tried to simultaneously eat three pancakes at once.

Rachel made a point of clanking her ring against the table or whatever surface she could.

So that people knew.

So that Chloe knew.

So that she knew herself.

That she wouldn't forget.

Ever again.

Rachel _was_ quieter that day, but no one could resist laughing or grinning around Chloe.

Chloe _did_ manage to eat three pancakes at once.

She won $20 for it.

 

* * *

**Epilogue**

* * *

  

Rachel was never quite as perfect again.

She didn’t do her missions.

She wasn’t following fate.

When she used her powers now, they’d exhaust her way more quickly.

She eventually stopped entirely.

Her life was different now.

She didn’t need them, anymore.

 

She told Chloe she wanted to be there for her more often.

She didn’t remember the last time Chloe cried so much.

But they were good tears.

They did have a honeymoon.

It was in LA, just like Rachel always wanted.

They didn’t come back to Blackwell.

Chloe couldn’t afford college.

Rachel was only there for her fate.

It was okay. 

Chloe was good with her hands.

Rachel was a natural model.

They would be okay.

 

Their lives weren't perfect.

Chloe was so nervous.

She tried to be such a perfect wife.

Rachel eventually told her what she learned from Max.

Rachel didn’t want a perfect wife. She wanted Chloe.

And Chloe didn’t want a perfect wife. She wanted Rachel.

They didn't want a perfect life. They just wanted one together.

That was the second time Rachel remembered Chloe crying until she had no more tears.

Whenever Rachel looked back at her time in Arcadia, she’d always wonder if “Blackwell death” that fate told her about was Victoria’s.

Or her own.

She’d always wonder if Max had it in her, all long.

Fate worked in mysterious ways, sometimes.

 

* * *

 

Chloe would eventually drag Rachel to Seattle, after a few years

After Max and Victoria had graduated.

There was a new exhibit at the Chase Space

That she wanted her to see.

It was called “Timeless.”

 

Rachel would never forget the way that Victoria would prowl around in her suit and eavesdrop on critical patrons.

Her glare could cut through steel, sometimes.

Victoria never lost her edge or her pride

But Max was good at buffing out the rough spots

Until she shimmered

Brilliantly.

Her spines no longer skewered

Others.

They were just protective

Of herself, and Max.

No one was going to stop Victoria from being the person she wanted to be

To Max

Not even

Herself.

 

Rachel would never forget the dreamy look that Max had on all night.

Her dress was so beautiful.

She had a little bit of glitter on

That would have been far too loud for Max

On any other night.

She spoke with such confidence

In her work.

She never tripped over her sentences

Or stammered

Once.

It was like she was reading

From a script.

Victoria told her to wear her hair longer

So she could style it more.

 

Rachel would never forget how much more well-adjusted Nathan looked in a proper, well-fitting suit.

How even his tone was.

Rachel never remembered him smiling much before.

Or going very far without his red jacket

Security blanket.

Rachel didn’t speak much that night.

But she found him just to tell him

That she wasn’t going to ask him

About the whispers

Ever again.

He said

Everyone was safe.

That’s all that mattered to him

Now.

 

Rachel would never forget the grin Chloe had as she wore the suspicious stares of the other patrons like a badge of honor.

Chloe was having a party now

Even if she was the only one invited.

There was no such thing as a drink limit

Or shame

When Chloe was around.

Max said

She still found Chloe’s behavior

Endearing.

 

Rachel would never forget the questions from curious patrons.

Did she know she was a subject of one of Max’s pieces?

How could she not. How could she forget that day?

Rachel knew what shot it would be

Before she saw it.

The one with her

In the forest.

It was a good shot.

It was the only shot, from Max’s first year

At Blackwell.

 

Rachel would never forget the knowing smiles from Mr. and Mrs. Caulfield.

They made a point of wearing adorable pride bracelets

That they would occasionally pull away

And let snap back

In unison.

It would always make Max blush and look away.

Embarrassed.

But they weren’t doing their job

Unless they had that effect

On her.

 

Rachel would never forget the way Mrs. Chase chatted pleasantly with Victoria and Max, all night long.

She could tell they both wanted to apologize

To one another.

Later.

Max would be

Overjoyed.

Mr. Chase could deal.

 

Rachel would never forget the way Mrs. Caulfield broke down and cried when Max introduced herself, her work, and her partner.

They were good tears.

Or the way Victoria got down on one knee and proposed to Max

Right in front of everyone

Victoria was always so

Dramatic

And confident.

Not even when doing something so nerve-wracking

Was Victoria anything less than entirely confident

That she knew what the answer

Would be.

 

Rachel would never forget the way Max couldn’t talk for the rest of the night

For how hoarse her voice was

After she shouted “yes”

As loud as she could.

Or how Rachel was going to pay $20 to Chloe _again_ because she totally called it.

Chloe knew that Victoria would wait until the moment was

Just right.

Or the scandalized look on Mr. Chase.

But he could freakin' deal.

Since no one was going to ruin

Tonight.

 

Rachel didn’t speak much that night.

Most of her words were for Chloe, now.

But she made sure to find Max and thank her again.

For everything she had done.

Max did change the world.

Or at least, she changed

Rachel’s.

Looking back, Rachel would only have one word to describe that night.

 

Perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, so.
> 
> This took a lot out of me. 
> 
> But it's over! You made it!
> 
>    
> Please let me know if you liked it in the comments below. 
> 
> I have a lot of other ideas, some in this AU, some not, and I will probably base how much I write based on the feedback, since I'm a terrible person and that's how my motivation works. Thanks to everyone who has commented so far, I've read every single one and they usually make me smile.
> 
> I also [have a tumblr](https://i-know-unkown-knowns.tumblr.com/) if that's your kink or you want to ask me things.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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